Another appalling surrogacy case

[LordSnot]

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A 72-year-old Scottish man and his wife commissioned a baby in the US. COVID then hit and they were unable to ship him over so he was "cared for by a professional nanny with no contact from his birth mother."

The man's wife died last year and he petitioned the courts for them both to be named on the baby's birth certificate, which was granted.

How can anybody defend surrogacy?

Are there many studies on this trauma? Specifically relating to surrogacy? I'm obviously aware of adoption trauma from forced removal at birth however the adoption is often (but not always) due to things like drug misuse, alcohol misuse, severe domestic violence in the home etc, which the baby is exposed to in utero which could account for poor outcomes for the child, including trauma. Or the knowledge that the child was rejected from its birth mother and put up for adoption. But are there many studies which follow up children who were born to surrogates?

women have autonomy over their own bodies, or so we keep saying. Her body, her choice and all that.

Actually, not in all cases. You can't sell your organs for example which is a fair comparison. You are also not allowed to cut off body parts for money. There are limits to what you are allowed to do when it actively harms you or raises your risk of serious injury or when coercion might be in play.

The framework for surrogacy that is often advocated for is primarily focused on the buyers, certainly not on the goods (the baby) and a little on the one doing the heavy lifting (the birth mother), whilst the birth mother is the one putting her life on the line. Any women who advocates for the coercion, exploitation and manipulation of women in such a way is just kidding herself. Take a look at Made in India, that tries to balance the complexities in surrogacy. One of the worst lines: I am not exploiting a poor women in India, look she gets 7000 dollars

(btw, the pregnant birth mother only gets 2000)

The documentary is old (2011) and commercial surrogacy was later banned for this very reason. Where there is way to exploit poor women, there are people who will do it. The only way to stop this exploitation is to make it illegal.

I can't help with surrogacy. But there have been case studies done of children who were forcibly adopted or misleading adopted (birth parents told they were dead). Both in places like Spain/South America where they were removed from political enemies and in places like Georgia where they were stolen from hospitals to be sold to prospective adopters. In many of those cases the children were being removed at birth from healthy loving families and then essentially sold to other healthy loving families. It still caused massive trauma.

Do you think women and men should be allowed to sell their kidneys and other organs for money (their body their choice). If not, why not?

I think a person's right to autonomy ends at the point at which it causes harm to someone else and infringes upon their rights.
Until recently thoughts have been focussed almost entirely on the rights of the childless couple to have a baby and not much thought has gone into potential negative effects for the baby. The baby has right to a mother, to know who that woman is and to have a birth certificate which reflects truthfully who they are. It's not right to gather eggs from one woman, another to carry and birth the baby, possibly a third to raise it or two men who mix sperm so they don't know who the father is either. It's all about the feelings of the adults and not about the rights of the child.

Setting aside those women who actively want to do this for a sister or close friend, women who become surrogates are usually doing it for the money - I'm not sure how much autonomy there is in that, when a woman is in dire financial straits. Or she is seeking a feeling of validation, of being important. And that's exploited by people who want something from her! When they've had what they want, where is her support then?

You don't see many rich women becoming surrogates, which tells you all you need to know about autonomy.