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Feminism: chat

Sorry, it's a pub toilets question.

7 replies

Internetwanderer · 17/12/2023 23:06

Sorry, I can see descriptions on here for schools but just wanted some feedback/advice on a newly opened bar I visited today.
The outer door was marked male and female. Very small space between outer and inner door. Pushed the inner door open to a very small space, which had 2 enclosed cubicles. One sink outside of these cubicles. Standing space in the sink area for approx 3 people including where one person would be using the sink.
No real queuing space.
I think I'm asking because I don't think I would feel comfortable queuing in the enclosed space directly outside the 2 cubicles with a couple of possibly fairly drunk males....its a sports bar and I'm used to seeing some pretty raucous behaviour in other sports bars.
One of the blokes I was with walked in to a woman waiting for a cubicle, apologised and left before realising, and they both then had a chat about finding it rather cosy and not being entirely comfortable. But others I was with have told me its the way things are now and I'm just outdated (but they also seemed resigned to it, no-one was OK with the set up).
Is this set-up OK? I'm partly thinking about the sink outside the cubicles. And a bit concerned about the rather squashed waiting space.
Thanks, and I am happy to be told I'm being picky.

OP posts:
greenbeansnspinach · 18/12/2023 07:45

Just that I’m very glad I don’t go to pubs any more as I would find that really horrid. Our local swimming pool, a very large one with lots of facilities, has mixed changing rooms with cubicles whose walls and doors don’t reach the floor. It’s a cramped space overall. I don’t like the feeling of being fussy or awkward, and I’m not shy, but I’ve only been once and am very reluctant to go again. Being at very close quarters with different genders all trying to get dressed and undressed made me uncomfortable. A man even tutted at me as I was stuck in front of the mirror while waiting for the one toilet cubicle, as he needed the mirror to style his hair.
Immediately outside the changing area, where the steam room and sauna are, there are a number of loungers. About ten. Mostly occupied by men surveying the scene, so you run the gauntlet as you’re going to and from the changing area. Again it just felt a bit weird and not comfortable.
Probably this is just the way things are now and we have to get used to it!
Anyway I haven’t been back to this municipal facility and have joined a hotel gym with a small pool and separate changing rooms like in the good old days. It costs about £40 a month and i feel quite conflicted about the whole thing - is this progress cos it doesn’t exactly feel like it.

Internetwanderer · 18/12/2023 08:00

At least I'm not the only one who isn't entirely comfortable. I think this was because it was just so very cramped and not especially well lit. It will be a bit of a squeeze past people to get around inside. And the one sink.
These were on the second floor, no toilets on the first floor, just a bar, and the ground floor did have single sex ones. Might stick to the ground floor if we return.

OP posts:
greenbeansnspinach · 18/12/2023 08:15

Internetwanderer · 18/12/2023 08:00

At least I'm not the only one who isn't entirely comfortable. I think this was because it was just so very cramped and not especially well lit. It will be a bit of a squeeze past people to get around inside. And the one sink.
These were on the second floor, no toilets on the first floor, just a bar, and the ground floor did have single sex ones. Might stick to the ground floor if we return.

Things are changing even though we don’t completely understand why and we have to go along with it I suppose. I spoke to the staff at the pool just to say I felt slightly awkward and they were sympathetic but clearly didn’t understand why I had a problem with it.

deydododatdodontdeydo · 18/12/2023 09:28

This set up sounds exactly like a bar I go to. But it's a small bar and I can't think of another way they could fit it in.
It's always been like that and I'm not aware of any issues.

Internetwanderer · 18/12/2023 12:27

Thanks for the replies. It wouldn't stop me returning, but I still think I'd prefer to avoid that particular toilet. I'm obviously just getting older/pickier!!

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 18/12/2023 12:58

I've come across tjos in a rather posh hotel. Sink area is communal but separate men and women cubicles. Apparently designed like that 100 years ago!

CatamaranViper · 18/12/2023 13:05

**Edited as I hadn't read OP's second post

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