Girls on Board - any experience?

[PeachesVonBeach]

This initiative is being rolled out across DDs Junior School. I’ve read When Girls Fall Out written by the (white male 60-something 🙄) Founder and I’m really uncomfortable with it in principle, although I can see that he makes some fair points and I totally see why schools would be keen to adopt it to save time.

So far this term, the girls alone are being kept in for special meetings to discuss roles in friendship groups and the emphasis seems very much to be on letting the girls sort things out themselves once they understand whether they are a “queen bee” (this comes directly and be a rehash of the much older book Queen Bees and Wannabes) or a “girl in the water” or anything in between. They are supposed to understand the roles but not label each other?! Those not having problems are then supposed to use empathy and think about taking the “girl in the water” into their group. Boys don’t have to do this because apparently they are straight forward and don’t use exclusion. Unless there is clear bullying there isn’t supposed to be any teacher involvement, apart from when someone feels like they are “in the water” and a sort of “crisis meeting” of sorts happens and they talk through the same slide show again.

My youngest Dd Y5 (9) is really struggling to understand why they’re being separated from the boys to talk about “girl stuff” and why she keeps having to go to the same meeting!

I’m feeling pretty enraged about this all but can’t put my finger on what it is that’s making me feel so cross!

Man the Thinker.

Perhaps engage with posters making points about the content and the evidence for this approach rather than the odd one who commented on the sex of the organisation's founder, @Validus.

I also don't have a problem with people making money from their ideas. I do think that people who purchase their content need to be aware that profit is the motivation, and to review and judge the content and its proven outcomes before purchasing. There should be more guidance for state schools to ensure that content delivered on training days and to students is evidence-based and cost-effective, with measurable outcomes.

If it helps the book about boys in school he's done is not good either. Gave me the rage!

Coming back to add that the boys at my DD's school are also really respectful and well mannered.

This will also be partly down to the efforts of the Girls on Board founder when he was headmaster here. At her previous school the boys behaviour could be disgusting at times ( sexual harassment type behaviour even in Y7)

The boys and girls at her current school mix really well socially and she doesn't have the issues with boys making fun of her or making her feel stupid for getting things wrong in class like she had before.

I have never met the previous headmaster as he left the term before my DD joined but I have to say he left behind a really fantastic and well run school full of really well mannered and respectful pupils.

Do you think that the boy's behaviour was changed/improved by the girls being taught about girls friendship groups, about who is the Queen Bee and that girls without a friendship group are always a problem? Is that what sorted out the boys behaviour at this school?

No I don't think that at all. I'm just trying to say that whatever you think of this headmaster's ideas or this scheme that he is marketing to schools he was clearly excellent at his job and the difference in the behaviour and attitudes of the kids in his old school compared to every other school I've been involved with is stark. The atmosphere is lovely and it's not a particularly strict school either. I do sometimes wish they would be a bit left soft on the kids to be honest. But my daughter feels completely safe for the first time in her school life since starting here.

I don't think anyone was suggesting that this chap was a bad head teacher or that his previous schools were hotbeds of abuse.

I'm critical of the content of this training and of the lack of evidence that is is effective, and cost effective.

I know that when I was a teenager this sort of approach would have alienated me and would not have helped me at all.

@fedupandstuck I've not really looked that deeply into the scheme since my DD joined so don't have any strong opinions on the methods. The results for me are obvious though. Maybe it wouldn't work as well in another school, our school is very small which helps I'm sure (bullies would have nowhere to hide) My daughter has had issues with other girls being mean all through her school life but at this school she was welcomed with open arms by every other pupil and has made lots of lovely friends. Any "drama" between pupils is quickly resolved. It's been an absolute joy to see how well these kids look after each other.

Separating the girls out to teach them about some unscientific personality archetype voodoo woo should be a concern for parents of boys and girls at the school.

They don't need to be indoctrinated into sexist stereotypes of their friendships. Anyone can make some broad generalisations about personality types or roles and then have people - especially children - read it and identify themselves in the descriptions then start slowly internalising parts of it and unintentionally acting according to this nonsense in some ways.

Sounds like a terrible influence on your children and that parents should be calling an emergency PTA to raise it.

I'm a bit concerned about the queen bee label. To me it suggests a woman who, more than a leader, uses her influence over others to bully and exclude and make her followers obey. I'd be a bit concerned about any child being publicly given that label. As for "girl in the water" just yuck!

I think the author must have been a genuinely good headmaster but a lot of that down to personality and cannot be codified into a method

Our school have rolled this program out and I am finding the language shared with my children and the parents very worrying and misogynistic. They have not yet convinced me labelling girls only in a mixed gender school is helpful to prevent bullying. I worry about the longer term consequences encouraging "no more upset girls" in school. It's unfortunate as the idea behind it is supposedly about showing empathy, having discussions etc which could be helpful. However I've not observed this in the roll out or when questioning issues with the program. I'm very curious as to how this has been allowed in state schools as it is.

Have you let the school know, Muminamillion?

Yes, I have made my thoughts very clear and intend to continue to do so until I have the answers/ changes needed to protect children from inappropriate language that so far seems to be targeted at protected characteristics, i.e. sex.

Brilliant, well done.

• and sorry, Mumonebillion, I got your name wrong!

that's ok, sadly someone already had mum in a million :(
Have you also spoken to school or are you not involved with the program?