BBC Article about a celebrity surrogate's experience.

[CandlelightGlow]

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-64421478

I have been on the offense about surrogacy due to the bodily autonomy justification but have never been comfortable with the commodification of women's bodies and of babies.

The poor woman in this article shares her experience of almost being in a situation where she was pregnant to term with a potentially unwanted child, due to the celebrity in question having already used a surrogate, presumably (from the article) without even telling her another surrogate had already been sourced and was pregnant?

The callous attitude toward surrogates from this celebrity does illustrate further how unethical the process is.

It's so strange to me that in a country like America where so many aspects of female bodily autonomy and reproductive rights are so tabboo, that the selling of babies and purchasing of wombs is completely on the table.

Just read this and came to post about it. I'm glad to see the BBC has looked at the other side of this. I'm anti surrogacy anyway but I don't know how anyone could read this and not question the ethics.

Oh gosh, that should say on the fence* not offense! But yes, I'm so shocked to hear about the experiences of women who have been through this process. How transactional it is and how you could literally be a back up pregnancy.

I wonder how many other women have had similarly traumatic experiences but have signed NDAs and so can't speak about them

I can't understand a legal system that allows an NDA to hide an illegal action, such as a breach of contract.

I thought it was interesting that the woman engaged in surrogacy for a third time, with twins for another couple, so to 'wash away' the experience of the second pregnancy.

There's really nothing to stop commissioning parents to engage with several women at once and have multiple women pregnant at the same time, the contracts are fully weighted in one direction.

Absolutely; it's not technically legal and at least in the UK there is backlash against the fact that this happens. However I also wonder about stuff that isn't illegal but is poor treatment too, and would attest to the actual picture of what it's like to be a surrogate.

I found that interesting too, though I know that some women do love being pregnant and carrying children. I actually love it too and if I had more resources and no environmental concerns I'd probably have more kids! But the idea of giving them up would be awful.

There is also the fact that some people will get drawn into dodgy dealings, especially with non celebrity couples searching for surrogates. I remember reading about one couple who was swindled into giving a supposed teen mother money to support her through her pregnancy with the idea they would adopt the baby at the end; the girl wasn't even pregnant and had done this to multiple people. And then on the other end of the spectrum, women promising babies to couples but then not being able to bear to part with the child upon giving birth.

I genuinely don't know if this is an argument for or against surrogacy coming more into law - the same way one valid argument against limiting abortion rights is the fact it is known that illegal and therefore more risky abortions will still happen anyway. But morally I really really hope it doesn't become more normalised.

Your point is timely OP as it is becoming more normalised, social and in law.

The draft bill is due out soon. There has been a lot of discussion on this board (before the split) on how proposed laws would make surrogacy much more available and easier in the U.K.

What a shocking article. But glad to see Megha Mohammed covering it.

Meanwhile the BBC's Rome correspondent is posting on Twitter about flying back from Canada to Portugal where he lives with his husband with the baby they just bought. Surrogacy is illegal in Portugal so not sure how they're doing that legally.

Really good article. I do understand it's nuanced and some women truly want to do it and enjoy being surrogates, but I think highlighting the power imbalance is so important.

I thought it was telling that the examples of inappropriate behaviour from surrogates towards the celebs (as cited by the woman running a surrogacy agency) were so minor in comparison to the harms that the surrogates can suffer. The surrogate might ask the celeb to use their influence and connections to have the surrogate's cousin's screenplay read, oh dear. Yes, it's grifty behaviour, but the greatest harm the celeb might suffer here is a bit of professional embarrassment when the screenplay turns out to be shit. That doesn't seem remotely comparable to the physical and emotional risks the surrogate runs!!

Was that the one making a joke of some sort about the baby being 'hand luggage'?

The family courts in Portugal may not recognise the commissioning parents of this surrogacy arrangement but by the time the child is in the country it's a bit of a fait accompli.

Yep that's the one. They got a card from the crew too. Because everyone who takes an unvaccinated 6 week old on a plane deserves to be celebrated

Bloody autocorrect! Megha Mohan not Mohammed

Was reading this information:

www.ngalaw.co.uk/knowledge-centre/uk-surrogacy-law-history-reform/#:~:text=Non%20profit%2Dmaking%20surrogacy%20agencies,same%2Dsex%20and%20unmarried%20couples.

The UK’s surrogacy laws were written more than thirty years ago and are woefully out of date and out of step with modern understanding of families. Under the current law:
The surrogate and her spouse are the legal parents of the baby born
Surrogacy agreements are unenforceable
Parents who have children through surrogacy overseas are the legal parents in the country where their child is born but not in the UK
Parenthood is transferred to the intended parents through a court process which takes up to a year after the birth, and has problematic and outdated criteria
The law appears to restrict payments to surrogates to ‘reasonable expenses’ but in reality the courts routinely authorise compensation, and the rules are both confusing and unenforceable
In the UK it is illegal to advertise, and for surrogacy agencies to make a profit
None of this works well for parents, surrogates or – most importantly – for children

I wonder how they came to the conclusion that limited laws on surrogacy are first and foremost affecting the children involved..?

I do understand the emotive and empathetic argument - gay couples cannot naturally have children. I genuinely have unreserved empathy for this and don't think it should be made light of.

I am however concerned that the emotive argument of "what about people who can't have babies or conceive naturally" is being used to push forward these laws and amendments.

The same website states in their info about disputes, the following: Although people talk about a surrogate having a ‘right to change her mind’, this is not the reality on the ground.

I find that really chilling.

I agree, CandlelightGlow. I am genuinely torn on the topic of same-sex couples and I know that couples experiencing infertility must go through tremendous pain.

But it's shocking to me that even a very perceptive article like the one posted here didn't get into the potential negative effect on the children created through this process, and whether surrogacy is remotely in their best interest!

It is not same sex couples who can't have children. It's men.

They aren't infertile. They just can't have babies because they're men.

Children are not a right.

Here's another article from the BBC about the horrific surrogacy trade in Colombia. It's originally in Portuguese written for the BBC's Brazil website so please excuse crappy google translate.

www-bbc-com.translate.goog/portuguese/geral-64348575

Sorry I don't think that link works. Here's the original article: www.bbc.com/portuguese/geral-64348575 and you can put it into translate to read it (assuming your Portuguese is as rubbish as mine!)

I do understand, but my point was the argument is applied to anyone who can't conceive naturally - "she's too old, she had fertility issues, they're a lovely gay couple who would make great dads" etc.

The fact that those situations are sad and rightly garner sympathy as you say, doesn't make having children a right especially when the solution is surrogacy.

Horrendous. Can anyone figure out who Catherine is?

I will name and shame two "celebrities" who have horrendous surrogacy stories like this:

Zheng Shuang

Sherri Shepherd

Came on and name changed to share this. Glad it's been picked up by BBC and covered in a fairly balanced way.

I do so hate the mealy-mouthed (or is it?...) "Surrogacy is not for everyone. But for something this personal, if everyone involved feels happy and empowered, we shouldn't judge other people's choices," right at the end. How can everyone involved be happy and empowered? I imagine the helpless newborn ripped away from the only mother it's ever known at hours old feels fairly fucking disempowered, for example.

I’ve been seeing more about same sex couples or individuals choosing ti co-parent with a friend who also wants a child. Eg two gay men and a single woman choose to have a child together and co-parent that child. So there are other options for people to have children that don’t necessarily involve the removal of an infant from their mother for the benefit of wanna be parents.

I agree op- surrogacy makes me so uncomfortable. Especailly people travelling to countries with high poverty and/or very lax surrogacy laws to get a baby. It’s just baby trafficking isn’t it.

"we shouldn't judge other people's choices."

Yes we should, we judge the choices of adults all the time! I think much of our public indecency laws and child protection laws are built on judgement such as shaming and we also recognising children as human being who are vulnerable in society, even in a civilised one. Why else do we have prisons?

If it's a free for all and everyone can exactly what they want then we would be in chaos.

I believe adoption is far better than surrogacy. You are giving that child a better life that is beautiful. There are so many unwanted children in the world who are being handed over to SS because they don't want them.