Laura Corkill - Her Son's Eulogy

[Dreamwhisper]

I'm just reading the article on the BBC about the experience of Leiland-James' birth mother.

I understand that there are two sides to every story, and that being honest and 100% factual about the complexities around a child being removed can be hard to unpick.

But the whole situation really shines a light on women who are losing everything, losing their children, due to the actions of abusive men.

I was so horrified and brought to tears (well I was crying the whole time) when I read the following:

"They even tried to write the eulogy," she says. The BBC has seen a draft copy of it sent by a social worker, which includes the words: "Leiland I am sorry I was not able to be the parent you needed."

How can this be? The article also suggests that several women have come forward to the charity involved to say that children had been removed from the care of the mother and place with the father accused of abuse?

What's going on here. The prejudice mothers who are also DV victims is appalling.

Like a PP said I still find it mind boggling that there can be enough evidence of a mother being victim of DV to remove her children from her care but not enough evidence to sufficiently prosecute the perpetrator of that DV.

It is a very "make it make sense" situation.

The trouble is, what if they rail against being controlled by the state? What if they don’t stay in the safe place? Or worse, bring the abuser to the refuge. Then they’ll lose the place in refuge and then what?

I don't think when the alternative is putting a child in the care system, these questions shouldn't pose insurmountable barriers to even trying to change the system.

No, it doesn’t make sense, I agree. I would comment that many cases that come to court do have other issues for the child as well - some of which may be intrinsically linked to the DV, such as parental mental health or substance use. But certainly in cases where DV is by far the main or only concern, there does need to be much more focus on consequences for the perpetrator.