Women 'hitting the wall'

[dietpepsi13]

I have seen an abundance of you tube channels and so many men online who seem to spend a lot of time bashing women pretty much over the age of 30, I've now learned that it's called the 'red pill' or 'manosphere ' and the more I read about it, the sadder I become that this level of hatred actually exists towards women now, that these guys should assign worth to a woman based just on how she looks and what age she is. Of course I'm aware that not all men think like this, but I was actually shocked to find these misogynistic communities online and I'm not even that old. Why do these men actually end up like this? I'm a lesbian so obviously don't have much understanding of relationships with men beyond friendship

I've never seen anything like this. How do you stumble across it on YouTube? I'm not saying it isn't out there but surely you'd have to go looking.

@Rosehugger I came across some guy who was anti feminism on you tube and discovered it from there

They are the sort that think women owe them pretty.

Could be related to a sense of entitlement originating in an overly-adoring mother relationship early in their development?

My exH adored me - that's how it felt - up to the point of late in my first pregnancy. I genuinely thought he loved me as a person. With hindsight, the adoration waned slowly up until the point I started to look middle-aged. Then he moved on to others. My value to him was solely my youthful attractiveness. Very sad individuals, these men.

I recommend reading a book called 'women don't owe you pretty', amazing book that really opened my eyes and has beautiful illustrations in it too

@dietpepsi13

I'd never heard of 'red pill' but since reading up on it, it made me think of a few men, from my past, who would feel very much at home with it.

I like the sound of the book you mentioned @kobacat1981

Similar men can also be found all over Reddit. It scares me to think how normalised this type of misogyny is becoming.

Misogyny is alive and well.

Keep calling it out, but don’t expose yourself to to much of it.

I've noticed it's quite common on some forums, which is why I try to avoid SM it's so depressing. How much the men saying these things really believe it is anyone's guess.

I used to work with a man who'd loudly proclaim that women were past their sell by date past 30and no use at all, although he talked adoringly of his wife who was in her 40s. Of course he was a pretty gross individual himself. I think it was a form of gaslighting or undermining of the women in the office. Like marking his territory "don't think we've employed you because of your talents" kind of thing.

I paid him little mind, he seemed like quite a sad man.

@UsernameNotAvailableHmm it's a wonderful book , I'll try to link a picture of the cover

Are they not just young lads though? It's normal enough for young men to not fancy women much older than them, statistically normal, rightly or wrongly its the way it is. But the majority of normal, well adjusted young men find a partner and happily grow older with her, even if they never stop fancying young women in their heads.
Thinking older women are past it is understandable, surely. I'm quite happy with age taboos as long as it applies both up and down the way
I also think using crude and disrespectful language is a subculture bonding thing, and I don't think the crude chat to violent misogynist pipeline is real, generally.

I've come across bits of this only so am not an expert.

crude and disrespectful language is a subculture bonding thing, and I don't think the crude chat to violent misogynist pipeline is real, generally.

The more we learn about the culture at Met Police, the more real that it seems and the implications of that are far-reaching.

[quote kobacat1981]@UsernameNotAvailableHmm it's a wonderful book , I'll try to link a picture of the cover[/quote]
Thank you, I'll get it

@EmbarrassingHadrosaurus

crude and disrespectful language is a subculture bonding thing, and I don't think the crude chat to violent misogynist pipeline is real, generally.

The more we learn about the culture at Met Police, the more real that it seems and the implications of that are far-reaching.

I think there's probably a lot of different dynamics involved. I've not been following the Met thing in any detail, so won't comment on that.

But there's - especially now- a lot of disapproval over certain words or discourse - it can lead into a subversive thrill and bonding exercise to say the naughty words out loud. It's not a hate thing against the subject of the words, it's predominantly a kick against the authorities that tell them not too. I suppose its like shouting Willy and Bum in a school yard.

A lot of these red pill men, especially youtubers, are grifters trying to sell courses to incel types or younger men struggling at dating.

It scares me to think how normalised this type of misogyny is becoming

Becoming You think it's a new thing that men hate women?

I don't think this is anything new.
It is interesting that there isn't really a female equivalent of the Incel/Red Pill brigade making similar YouTube (and other) videos.

@Brefugee

I don't think this is anything new. It is interesting that there isn't really a female equivalent of the Incel/Red Pill brigade making similar YouTube (and other) videos.

What's interesting is that the concept of incel (involuntary celibate) was identified by women and originally the discussion was around lonely people struggling to find love.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-45284455

As men dominated and (according to the 'founder') hijacked the word "as a weapon of war", it became something else altogether.

www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/25/woman-who-invented-incel-movement-interview-toronto-attack

The only vague equivalence that comes to mind is Valerie Solnas' SCUM Manifesto but you'll be aware of the controversies and discussions around that (and her attempted murder of Warhol).

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SCUM_Manifesto

Would Solnas make YT and TT videos today?

absolutely! and would be absolutely getting it in the neck in a way the Red Pillers aren't.

They’re just sad no woman wants them. It’s the classic ‘you’re ugly anyway’ response to rejection.

I thought red pill was part of incel culture? Is it a separate thing?

I had men calling me an "old maid" because I wasn't married by 25. That was still a common worry for women (In the US, 20 years ago) that they'd be unmarried at age 15, the "old maid" age.
I don't hear it as much now and I think the pool of men who think that way is shrinking. My best friend is happily in a relationship with a man 15 years younger. Misogyny just seems worse because the internet and media are exposing it more.
I was just on Reddit reading conversations in a section called Ex-Redpill. It was so refreshing to see men calling out misogyny and realizing how dangerous the Redpill group is. Maybe I'm too optimistic but I think things are getting better. Slowly.

Oops I meant to say it was a common worry for women that they wouldn't be married by 25 but I accidentally wrote 15.
...It wasn't quite that bad.

I don't know how to edit a post - or can you?

a lot of low-value men with too much time on their hands and nothing useful to occupy their time with. In the not so distant past, they used just to be drunk.

This misogynistic cliche has been around since the dawn of time hasn't it? "Men age like wine, women age like milk". Thankfully, in the real world, people can have happy fulfilling relationships with plenty of attraction involved regardless of how "old" they are. I almost feel sorry for these men - their skewed views of women and life in general is really holding them back, but they only have themselves to blame I suppose.