Would you be able to spot the menopause?

[WarriorN]

BBC report. I've been wondering if I've got some peri issues at 45. Earlier actually but I had no idea about perimenopause.

But this report reads as if it's usually early 50s. Everything I've been reading seems to be saying you could actually quite commonly start seeing peri symptoms from 40.

I only recently understood that meno is when they've stopped for a year, for most women around 51. But the shenanigans can go on for 10 years prior to that.

Why is the word perimenopause not used?

When I was 40 I would have completely dismissed any thought of it. At yet it seems, from reading various bits and Davina's programme, that starting hrt is best in your 40s for many women,

I don't feel there will be positive change for women around this until the language and age changes?

As women don't seek help due to unawareness and Gp dismissal it's possible that peri menopause is more commonly found among a younger age groups than currently reflected in literature?

Also conditions such as fibromyalgia and cfs, more common in women, could be worse or actually linked to peri?

Girls go through puberty though. They have periods which for many mean a variety of unpleasant side effects every month.

I think the idea that the lack of understanding in society is due to credulous women, and feminism. Is an issue take.

Those are not the reasons I would point to for the lack of understanding / knowledge about peri menopause.

I think we are miles apart and so will need to agree to disagree.

'Similarly, people who think of themselves as young, who see all kinds of young looking women of 35 or 40 around, maybe have only just started having kids themselves, are surprised to start to feel the effects of age, to realise they are really on the downward slope of fertility.'

This part is about women again I assume.

Surely men are way worse for this! That's quite well known isn't it?

Given that we are talking about women's reproductive systems, yes, I am talking about woen specifically.

The same is true for men to a large extent but because of their different bodies, it plays out differently, but that's not really relevant here.

It is though because men don't in general go to such lengths to look young

And their behaviour around trying to feel young is so well known.

How men experience ageing has zero to do with how they deal with going through menopause.

When I was at school, we had a talk from the Tampax lady, a lesson on puberty, about a million lessons on how the baby develops in the womb, and later, a couple of lessons on contraception, which focused on condoms, because it was the height of the AIDS epidemic, though being a girls' school, there was quite a bit on preventing pregnancy as well as STIs. I don't remember menopause being mentioned at all, though I imagine that it did get a single sentence in the puberty lesson. However, I don't know I would have paid attention there had been more focus - even my mother didn't need to know yet, let alone me in my teens!

It is shocking that there's so little attention given to it in medical training. About half the population will go through it, and about 75% will experience perimenopausal symptoms. That's an awful lot to ignore, and even if some of those 75% won't experience severe symptoms; others will go through a really debilitating experience. It should be basic knowledge for GPs, but it isn't. And not just perimenopause - the fight some women have to get a diagnosis for endometriosis or similar conditions.

I'm 49, so the fact menopause and perimenopause seems to be fashionable, with companies introducing menopause policies and so on, is a good thing.

Would I recognise it? So far, I am still regular. I notice PMS more than when I was younger, but I suspect that has at least as much to do with not being on the Pill as I was through most of my 20s and 30s. Periods are heavier and clottier, but also I am heavier, having comfort eaten my way through various events. I don't know if this means I'm not really experiencing symptoms yet, or that I am not spotting signs. But what I experience or not isn't as important as the fact that many, many women do go through a bad time, and it seems to be down to pot luck whether you get a knowledgeable, helpful GP or not. It shouldn't be down to luck; we should be able to expect it.

Yes sure.

Thing is that when you say things like:

'All of this has fed into much of the credulity we see now, especially from other women,'

'. If you've ever traveled in a place where there is little access to or use of beauty products, you notice that people of 40 often look decidedly middle aged. You can see it in their grey hair, their teeth, body shape, etc. They can see themselves as elders. We, on the other hand, can manage to fool ourselves. People often think of themselves as young up until 30 or even 35.'

Neither of these even in context has anything to do with menopause.

The first says women in particular which means compared to men, are credulous.

I already pointed out that that sounds sexist.

The second as well, is singling out women around women (I checked with you) and seems to be a pretty negative comment about women while ignoring that men are prone to this.

I'm not sure why it's a bad thing to feel/ want to feel young until you're '30 or even 35'. This is about menopause. That is very young to go through menopause.

In the end I don't see that saying women are in particular... Gullible? Naive? Not engaging brain?

And that well all that other stuff about products etc.

Has to do with menopause.. they just sound like sexist comments and so yes I'm going to mention it.

I suppose it boils down in essence to women are dim and vain. I mean it's phrased fancier but that's what I read.

Yeah, that's not what I said.

I'm talking about women because this is a conversation about women's bodies and how they relate to them. The male experience is really not relevant.

If you really believe women are not affected by their cultural environment, have at it.

I don't.

I'm just interested in why you made points saying women were more credulous (than men) and talked about wanting to feel young as a negative thing for women, when men do it to.

And neither points have anything really to do with the topic.

Your point that feminism is why women don't know this stuff is also very unusual.

It feels like your point is that it's all the fault of women. I don't get that.

@NiceGerbil, thank you, I'm on it re GP, I was just adding my voice to those who didn't realise how little most of us knew about peri-menopause.
Interesting discussion going on here.

It’s good to see that the conversation around menopause is much more out in the open now but we’ve got such a long way to go! I see lots of women saying they are determined not to go on HRT even if they have terrible physical effects from menopause as if taking it is a sign of weakness.

I started on HRT when I was 48 which has been great but I still thought of it in terms of insomnia/hot flushes Abd that I might get “dry”, ha fucking ha!! Vaginal Dryness, now there’s a fucking euphemism that can get in the sea! Nobody mentioned vaginal atrophy to me, nobody said “actually in lots & lots of women, the loss of oestrogen will cause your labia to shrink, your clitoris to shrink or even disappear, the skin of your vulva and vagina to thin & itch constantly & sex will become agony”. No one mentions that so when it happens it’s a horrible horrible shock. I think of all those jokes about menopausal women going off sex and all those marriages that flounder in mid life because women’s sex drives plummet because no one tells you there’s a very good chance this might happen to you

Im now on topical oestrogen, progesterone & now testosterone but I haven’t had sex in nearly a year. Luckily my DH is very understanding but bloody hell. The menopause is so much more than hot flushes & feeling a bit grumpy

And breathe….