postnatal depression/anxiety positive recovery stories please

[mumcity]

hi following the birth of my second child 14 weeks ago I am suffering with post natal depression, but primarily terrible anxiety. I have experienced a number of horrible panic attacks that seemed to come from no where......I tried dealing with it alone but finally relented and have started on fluoxatine (prozac). I have taken five days worth and have not noticed much change. I would love to hear from anyone else who has come out the other side and had positive results from anti-depressants following post natal depression/anxiety. I need reassurance that I will get out of this....

Terrible anxiety today, maybe I spoke too soon :(. Has helped to
Read this thread and see that people can get better within a couple if months.

Don't lose heart hairytale, I had a handful of dodgy days in first six weeks, don't read too much in to it, remember even people without an anxiety disorder have up and down days too. Try to stay positive, you will get through this. PM me if you want to, thinking of you.

Thanks mumble. I feel better today.
Had an anxious early morning but not as bad today.

We've come out for the day early and visited my sister and family and we're taking a picnic out for lunch, to get some fresh air.

I'm going to see GP about upping to 75mg of sertralene tomorrow.

Wow!! Out early visiting, picnic too. I know how massive even these things are. Well done and keep going. You are on the mend. Hope gp visit goes ok.

I guess I am. It doesn't feel like it when im lying awake at 6am worrying though :(

It's such early days, you are doing brilliantly. You are in recovery, you can't rush that, as much as you might want to. If you had broken your leg you wouldn't expect to get up and walk on it straight away, you would accept the support of the plaster and a few wobbles as you learn to walk again. Be kind to yourself.

Thank you mumble.

Mrswaldo how are you doing?

I am feeling better.I started taking the tablets last week. My GP said they would taken 2 weeks to kick in. Still have moments where I feel trapped but not so much now. I found that everything we did, or wanted to do, was a constant battle. Main issue is like hairytale, lying awake worrying. I've planned myself a very busy week this week and have forced myself to go to things like an NCT coffee morning and buggyfit. I find it helps to stay busy! Hopefully being so tired and so busy might help me sleep!!!
Thank you for all your kind words. I like the bit about "make the sunshine come back". That's how I feel, in a dark fog and def want that sunshine back!

Glad to hear you're starting to feel better . I am better when I'm busy too.

Hi all
I’m new to this group. I’m having really bad postpartum depression I guess. My symptoms are like this: constant lightheadness, shaky feeling, palpitations, short of breathe m, pressure on my chest, tinnitus, muscle ache everywhere and I have been going like this for 8 months. My LO is 8 months old. I’m frustrating 😩 I took all possible tastes but all came back okey. Any advise? Is it recoverable? Any positive news please?

Hi!
I’m writing to see you if you get this??
I’m going through exactly what you went through and would love some encouragement I feel like I’m going crazy!! X

@Jackie999 how are you now? My little one is 8 months and I’m going through the same and petrified to try antidepressants...

Hi @Mehripoop , I am going through this too just now . My little one is 16 months though! I stopped breastfeeding and bam one day I woke up as a completely different person , was hoping. Was just hormones balancing themselves out so I’ve waited a couple months but I’m not any better and have horrible thoughts and anxiety which I’ve never had before ! I have no choice now but to start antidepressants so I’m hoping the side effects don’t last long or be too awful! I am on day 4 today. How are you getting on? X

Hi @laurajm2601 I have some good days and some bad. I’m due to go back to work in May and I’m petrified about how I will cope. I still get all the symptoms on and off and god awful tinnitus and ear pain which is so unexplained as all tests come back clear. How can anxiety cause so much physical pain?? I miss the old me. I’ve had a baby before so none of this makes any sense as I have nothing to be anxious about but every little thing makes me panic. I get these head rush feelings every time I’m in my hallway and need to get my kids out- like there’s a racket but it’s in fact silent... I think I may have to try the antidepressants which are sat in my kitchen cupboard. How are you? What are your anxiety symptoms?

@Mehripoop oh gosh I was due to go back to work in September passed but have been on furlough since so I was lucky and was glad I didn’t have to go back and could stay with my baby longer until this happened now I’m not happy about anything! I feel like I have such a foggy head that I can’t seem to shake and have horrible thoughts too which is why I thought I have to give in and take the antidepressants. Today has been horrible on them and it’s only day 4 and my anxiety is bad and have just bawled out crying too! But yeah it causes physical pain doesn’t it like it actually hurts! I do feel worse on these pills just now so I don’t know how long I’ll be able to cope taking them for . I just get scared incase they don’t make me any better and all I’m doing is making myself worse! But they do say it can make you worse before feeling better don’t they but 4-6 weeks feels like a very long time! But then if they do help in that time then that would be good for you if you need to go back to work in May! X

@Mehripoop I had some good days and bad days too I thought but then I wasn’t sure if I was maybe just getting used to feeling like that rather than panicking so much in the beginning as I’ve never felt like this before . My good days weren’t even good days though , they were just a better bad day!

Youre right @laurajm2601. I’ve made myself so so ill with sinus and ear issues and it all stems from anxiety. I’m going to see a private ENT as I can’t take the feeling like I have a sneeze stuck every day and It’s making me more depressed

@laurajm2601 I feel the same. All bad days but some better! Everyone’s telling me to sort my anxiety before I create more health problems and I’m petrified of anti depressants because the first try gave me tinnitus. Which ones are you taking??

@Mehripoop oh it sounds awful!! Hopefully they can give you some answers. Just feels like it’s just not going away on it’s own doesn’t it . But don’t know what to do to get better! The doctor has given me sertraline (Zoloft) and to start on 25mg for two weeks then up it to 50mg. I’ve always been terrified of antidepressants and tbh I never ever thought I’d even need to ever take them I was perfectly fine before all this. It just seems so crazy! How long did you take them for the first time? x

@laurajm2601 I took 3 tablets of sertraline and my eye swelled up and then citalopram which gave me tinnitus. 😭 this is so hard.

@Mehripoop oh no your eye swelled up?!! it’s so difficult isn’t it ! it’s horrible like you can’t go on how your feeling but the stuff that’s meant to make you feel better only makes you feel worse it’s awful. I’m on day 6 now and yesterday I felt like i wanted to die , day 4 and 5 have been my worst days so far. Last night I managed to get a better sleep thank god but no appetite and haven’t eaten barely since day 4 and feel sick :( and still depressed and need to up the tablets to 50mg! it’s horrible when it makes you feel like there is no hope!! are you going back to the doctor ? X

I feel like my health anxiety has taken the mick with the doctor. I was convinced I had a major disease due to weird physical symptoms like burning arms, painful neck, legs. All sorts! I have a diagnosis for my ear pain finally (I went private) and it’s Eustachian tube dysfunction which can happen after having a baby. It’s bloody painful! At least I know I wasn’t making it up. Maybe I should go back to the doctor because I’m not really living am I? I just get through the day. The tinnitus has pretty much ruined any hope of recovery I had left. I miss the peace and quiet so so much. Maybe it’s an anxiety symptom that’ll go? I don’t wanna get my hopes up. Let me know how you get on. Try warm magnesium salt baths in the evenings. That’s one thing that’s really helped my evenings. @laurajm2601

@Mehripoop oh wow I’ve never even heard of that I’ll have a google! But yeah Atleast you know it’s something wrong rather than feeling like your going crazy! yeah I think going back to the doctor would be good as there are other options to try and it probably is worth it once you finally find something that works . I feel like my anxiety isn’t as bad today and it’s given me a glimmer of hope that’s it’s starting to work and I’ll get better! I feel like I have slight ringing in my ears too and the fuzzy head which I’m hoping will go away like a fog lifting ! I spoke to the doc yesterday and she was on about changing to a different one that was more drowsy if I wanted but I felt like I’ve got to this day so far and if it will make me better then I don’t want to start all over again on another one! I’ll take note of the bath thing! Right now I avoid baths as I feel like it’s just me and my thoughts then just thinking I’ll never get better and it will make me worse so I’ll have a bath when I’m feeling more positive! How long have you felt bad for ? I’ve never had this before in my life , yeah I’ve had down days but I’ve never been physically depressed I just find it all so crazy that it’s suddenly happened ! X

Tbh I’ve been such a stressy person all my life. I’m a teacher and I’ve had a rough decade in my personal life but I was strong and got through it all. Maybe because I bottled up so much emotion that my body now erupted? I had my son last May and I’ve been pretty down since then due to the birth trauma. The ear issue and ringing began around October. The sound sensitivity began then too. The ENT dr said it’ll settle but seems like it won’t. Awful pains in my face and head which can’t be explained either. I was referred to the perinatal team because my doctors are pretty useless and I’ve lied and said I’m taking eh anti depressants because I was so ashamed that I was scared to try another one. I feel like telling the Psychiatrist the truth but I look like such an idiot for lying....@laurajm2601