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Original poster

Insensitive GP

30 replies

WherecanIhide · 30/12/2010 21:11

Hi,

I went to the GP to ask to get different anti depressants (something soluble) and I saw a different doctor to who I normally see.

After explaining to him why I actually need anti - depressants through snotty sobs, he wrote a prescription and sent me on my way.

I am being over sensitive to be so upset about his lack of care/interest. It was so hard to explain everything (got a thread on 'relationship' forum)then just to be told to go without any supportive or kind words.

Also, just how bad/depressed feeling do you have to be before you get any professional support? Do you have to make a suicide attempt beofre anyone actually takes notice of what you are telling them?

OP posts:
Original poster
WherecanIhide · 30/12/2010 21:12

'before'

OP posts:
narmada · 31/12/2010 14:09

Oh you poor thing - I think the treatment you have received is awful. You are not being over-sensitive. Even if you were, you could not be blamed for it because you are depressed - it makes you oversensitive to everything, it's part of the illness. A good doctor should handle patients sensitively. This one really didn't by the sounds of it.

Some GPs are just crap (like the one you describe), others are fabulous. My regular one is great, but I saw a locum at the same practice who just shoved a questionnaire at me and didn't even look at the results...

Do you have anyone who can go with you and speak on your behalf if you feel your point of view is not being heard? Is there a crisis line in your local area that you could call perhaps, where the workers are better trained in all things to do with depression?

Keep posting on here - I have PND and have had a lot of support on here.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 31/12/2010 18:01

Thanks for your reply. I really feel like complaining to the practice manager. When we're feeling so bad, we just don't have the mental energy for that.

Normally I'd have my husband to go with me but he left me and our children just before xmas (hence the depression)and now have literally no one.

I'm pleased you have lots of support for your PND. Things seem to have changed since I had it 10 years ago - much more support now.

The Dr I saw is virtually retired and as it was the last appointment of the day I don't think he could be bothered.

I just feel sooooooo alone and isolated and this just about summed it all up ie no one cares.

OP posts:
ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo · 31/12/2010 18:04

ooh i totally sympatise. my GP is a very curt man. he doesn't show any understanding of suffering or fear at all. when possible i see the other gp in teh practise and always leave feeling better for talking to him.

what sort of help do you feel you need? is it counselling? ask to see your regular doctor and tell them what you think you need.

grumpywitch · 31/12/2010 18:10

Luckily, in my surgery there are quite a few docotrs, and when I have hit rock bottom have seen the fluffy ones who have been lovely. I have also seen a doctor after I had my first child who was very offish/ curt and made me feel like a stupid child.
If you are feeling unhappy, go to see the practice manager, and voice your concerns.
What I found helped, was to go and see a counsellor, someone objective you can go and tell all your woes to, and will listen objectively xx

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 31/12/2010 18:17

Thanks.

Got a screening phone appointment (for counselling) for 14th Jan. I don't want to be ungrateful but I need help/support NOW!

Just feel like I'm being kicked when I'm down.

Took first does of (soluable) Prozac so hoping that'll do something.

OP posts:
grumpywitch · 31/12/2010 18:55

You could try phoning daily and see if they have any cancellations x

grumpywitch · 31/12/2010 18:55

I know it is a ballache x

madmouse · 31/12/2010 18:59

But he did give you the meds that you felt you needed even though there may not have been a 'clinical' need for it and they are no doubt twice as expensive than normal ones as they are not made in such quantities. So he did listen...

We are all different - dh, ds and I have a curt GP with an average consultation time of 3 minutes. However he doesn't miss a thing and has been excellent if unemotional with dh's depression and rather than give me meds when I struggled with PTSD he preferred to see me frequently and monitor things.

I sympathise with your lack of support and it is totally awful that your dh has left you Sad

But our GPs are clinicians not friends. 14 January for a counselling assessment is quite quick as well, I know you need help now, I know the feeling - been there. Things will get better.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 31/12/2010 19:41

Thanks.

OP posts:
narmada · 31/12/2010 20:32

But... i you do feel really in need of help now and really cannot wait until mid jan, be sure to give your local crisis line a call.

I am so sorry about your husband, but you have done fab to get thru christmas this far, look at it that way. it is a difficult time of year when you are facing challenges.

narmada · 31/12/2010 20:32

that should be if you do feel.... duh.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 01/01/2011 11:09

Thanks

OP posts:
narmada · 01/01/2011 16:02

how are you feeling today??

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 01/01/2011 16:46

Hi narmada - wish I didn't wake up tbh. I know the theory that it'll get easier in time BUT not feeling it.

Thanks for asking.

PS really hoping the Prozac works for me.

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narmada · 01/01/2011 17:49

Do you have any real life support around at all? Friends or someone you could call on the phone even? I am so sorry you feel this way. I do sympathise. not much better myself. It is hard to be patient with this horrid, horrid illness.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 01/01/2011 18:04

I've not got anyone in real life. Low self esteem has prevented me from forming and keeping friendships (not long made that obvivous link).

Its my own fault I don't have friends but can't help not having family. I am VERY lucky to have 2 dc but mustn't rely on them emotionaly.

If it wasn't for them I'd have given up. I realised if I did suicide, I'd be making them suffer 'my pain' instead of me and that would be terrible and unforgivable of me.

OP posts:
Original poster
WherecanIhide · 01/01/2011 18:19

PS normally I count my blessings and feel grateful but with 'd'h leaving the bottom has fallen out of my world.

I supose I have done well in life to get to 38 and not felt heart ache. I was with him from aged 17 so have never been a single adult.

I have read seperation/divorce is a great time for reinventing yourself etc but all I can see is loneliness and isolation.

OP posts:
narmada · 01/01/2011 21:03

Well of course you are going to be completely destroyed by him leaving. Anyone would be. You are completely normal. You were with this man since you were 17! I am so sorry you don't have friends in real life.

I have found tablets like prozac to be hugely beneficial in the past, wherecanihide; they can take a few weeks to start working but when I first admitted depression and started taking them about 10 years ago, my world changed in about 4 weeks from grey to brightly coloured again. I really hope they work for you. When you are feeling stronger, you may have more energy to work on things like friendships, getting over your relationship breakdown, etc.

You are right about giving up, it is often the thought of my kids that keeps me going too, even when I feel I am being a completely rubbish mum to them, I still know they are better off with me than without me!

Anyway, I just want you to know you are not alone. I always find evenings the hardest.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 01/01/2011 22:41

Thankyou so much narmada - I really appreciate your posts.

I can't even be bothered to make them dinner so feel like a crap mum.

I hope prozac works as well for me.

OP posts:
charliesmommy · 02/01/2011 00:29

I lost a lot of faith in our GP last month.

Husband is off work with stress and has been for a while. His dad committed suicide and obviously this affected us all, but especially my hubby (only son).

Went to see GP last week for check up and she asks how he is feeling etc, then asks about family medical history and if his dad is still alive..... ffs.

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 02/01/2011 13:26

Makes you wonder how/why they become GPs...

OP posts:
narmada · 04/01/2011 15:35

wherecanihide, how are you getting on? Is that prozac doing anything yet??

Sorry not been on much - my DS has had a horrible virus and that combined with the reflux = refusing to feed properly=immense stress all round in our house :(

Original poster
WherecanIhide · 04/01/2011 21:56

Oh dear narmada - no fun for you or ds. Hope he gets better soon!

I'm taking the Prozac - I imagine it'll take a while for it to work (if at all).

Not had the horrible suicidal feelings today - thank goodness - can't cope with that. Normal depression-y feelings are easy in comparrison!

Thankyou very much for asking - it means a lot x

OP posts:
ImeldaSnowboots · 05/01/2011 14:39

Do you have a crisis-line number where you can call if you need support/to get through suicidal feelings. If not, you should maybe go back to GP (your usual one, not the crappy one) to ask for that, please be very honest if you do, it will make them more aware of the help you actually need.

My DSis, when depressed, often found it very hard to speak about how she was feeling but had to really push for her to tell about suicidal feelings etc, because her GP wasn't aware she felt that bad.