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Family planning

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Unsure whether to stop at two children or try again

3 replies

MammaD1 · 15/05/2026 12:40

Hello. I have a 5 year old and a 2 year old. I’m 36.5 years old. Each day having another final baby is on my mind. I don’t love the sleepless nights and find the toddler stage mentally hard. I just don’t want to regret not having more once I’m too old. My husband is older than me 45 and really isn’t interested in more. Should I enjoy 2 and the good times ahead or go again? The reason to stick with 2 is that I’ll be able to give attention to both and focus on my own life and career. 3 would purely be embracing this chapter of life and then having someone else in our family to share life with and support. I’m from a small family and no one is close or cares much. So there’s a feeling of making my own. I love being a Mum. I had one in 2021, stillbirth 2023 and then 2024. There’s a lot of emotion in there too. Thank you for any advice.

OP posts:
Janeykat · 15/05/2026 12:50

It's a really hard decision but your husband not being interested in more would be the deciding factor for me. I am 37 with a 2 year old and a 6 year old and always thought I would have 3 kids but we have agreed no more-- I probably would have one more if my partner also wanted one but he doesn't, and I don't want to try and persuade him into something he doesn't want. Also I think about things like what if it was twins/they had a disability/cost of living etc. life is good for us at the moment and I don't want to rock the boat. But I understand it is very emotional, I had 2 miscarriages between the kids and the thought of not being pregnant/having a newborn again brings some sadness. I am so sorry for your loss in 2023 and best of luck with your decision ❤️

ToKittyornottoKitty · 15/05/2026 12:52

Your husband is 45 and doesn’t want more, so it’s a done thing. Enjoy your children

Bonmot57 · Yesterday 14:25

ToKittyornottoKitty · 15/05/2026 12:52

Your husband is 45 and doesn’t want more, so it’s a done thing. Enjoy your children

This.

It would likely be a disaster to have a child with an unwilling partner and every child has a right to be wanted.

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