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Having another child - obsessive thoughts

1 reply

BeShyDenimWriter · 12/07/2025 14:14

Hi, so I'm a mum of two, and tldr version, I thought I wanted two kids, and now my two are here am madly in love with them and seem to be obsessed with the potential for a third in a few years.

Husband wanted two, doesn't understand my interest in this, as we're not exactly flying through it with our two (baby and three year old). But he gets it's important to not just shut it down and we agreed to talk about it in a year when baby is past 18 months and it's actually time for the decision. I think he hopes by then I'll have gotten less broody!

So I should just stop thinking about it till then but my brain is like a dog with a bone on this .. feels like maybe because it's the first time I've ever properly imagined three so I'm enjoying the surprise of that and keep going back to it.

Any tips for getting this out of my head from others who've had this kind of recurring thought about having another baby? It's so distracting and none of my usual techniques are working! (I've done some CBT for rumination in the past)

I just keep trying to imagine the future with or without this child, which is a pointless time sink I know, but I can't see to stop doing it! Any advice appreciated 👍

OP posts:
Tumbler2121 · 12/07/2025 15:07

Concentrate on the children you have. I think there are two biological things people don’t often mention or perhaps even realise, , 1. Wanting another baby when you’ve just had one and 2. Feeling as though you e ‘lost’ your baby when you give up breastfeeding, regardless of baby age (mine were 6 weeks and 6 months, similar feeling of loss.

are you financially sound and able to look after four children? You may get the same feeling after no. 3 ..

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