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The timeline struggle

2 replies

apt72 · 07/07/2025 08:04

I felt this was a thread for mumsnet…

We are planning our second child and I’ve been ready for a long time, but life has not been where we needed it to be. We’re almost there and know that we can bring a second baby into a secure, balanced and well loved home. There will be a slightly larger than hoped age gap and of course this only grows with each month passing by.

My struggle is, my mum was diagnosed with a terminal illness this year and I’m desperate to bring a baby into the world before she leaves us. Whilst I know that isn’t a given, as she could be gone tomorrow or she could be with us for 3 more years, it’s so unknown. Her recent decline does make me believe we have less time with her.

When I say we’re ready, me and my husband agreed to begin trying in the next few months. He’s now caught wind of his family booking a collective holiday next year and we wouldn’t be able to go if we didn’t wait until January time.

He knows how much I’ve been longing for this and it’s taken a while for us to get to where we need to be, without the added extra of my mums ill health.

I don’t know, am I unreasonable? There is no reason to believe we don’t have years and years with his family for future holidays. I just know how much it’ll break my heart if we timed it for a holiday and we lost the opportunity for my mum meeting the baby.

Sigh!

OP posts:
Blurrywateryeye · 07/07/2025 08:16

You need to stop focusing on the timeline. It could take you a while to get pregnant or it could take the first time. Babies don’t need much. Why can’t you try now?

apt72 · 07/07/2025 10:25

Blurrywateryeye · 07/07/2025 08:16

You need to stop focusing on the timeline. It could take you a while to get pregnant or it could take the first time. Babies don’t need much. Why can’t you try now?

We are just waiting for a house purchase to go through, so initially we really wanted that locked in before hand!

OP posts:
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