Keep getting cold feet

[Talksomesenseintomeplease]

Hi mumsnet!

I need someone to talk some sense into me.

My partner and I want to try for another child, first is four.

I spend a lot of the time feeling broody, remembering how much I loved being pregnant, thinking about my little boy when he was tiny. I know we all want another.

When it comes to ovulation time, I keep getting cold feet - I suddenly feel like I’m betraying my little boy and feel utter, cold dread at the thought of it.

Should I push through it?

My boy has some additional needs so I’m very protective (I know we all are but I wonder if this adds a layer of worry for me) but at the same time it’s important to me that he has a sibling as someone else in his life when we are gone.

Feeling pretty rotten about it and want to feel excited 😢

Hi OP,

Listen to your intuition. When it comes to ovulation time, I keep getting cold feet

Am a solo mum of 1 and he turned out o.k. 33 now.

Thanks for your thoughts.

All other times I want to almost desperately. It’s only when it comes to it that I feel so scared.

Have you spoke to your partner about this? If you really think about why you feel this way, can you come up with anything concrete?

When we first decided to start trying for my daughter I was so sure I was ready, but 3 months in a row it came to when I knew I’d be ovulating and just couldn’t do it. I spoke to my husband about it and in the end it just came down to the fact that although all the “steps” we’d wanted to tick off before trying were done (house, wedding, savings etc), I just personally didn’t feel ready at that time! No specific reason, just a feeling I had, so we waited until I was 100% and then started trying again.

I would write a pros and cons list. Put intuition on the list if you like, as one of the cons, but don't allow it to be the only thing you use to decide. You have a brain for that.
There are plenty of ways your existing child will likely benefit from having a sibling, both in childhood and later life. It's not all a disaster from their point of view!

Thank you so much, I will try a list.
I’d hate for fear to make such an important decision for me - I’m 39 so reaching a point where no decision becomes the decision if that makes sense. I know rationally that we all want it yet I feel so terrified when it comes to the crunch. Pretty exhausted with it really 😂