My feed

to access all these features

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Family planning

Am I running out of time?

7 replies

pastypam · 07/06/2022 09:30

I turn 30 this year, and I am yet to become a parent. I'm married, with a mortgage. All my friends have had babys or are on their second, I feel like almost everyone my school age has gone on to become mums or dads. And I do want a child, but I'm not itching to get pregnant or feel in a rush? Am I weird?? Am i running out of time.... I feel like I'm constantly being judged about it. It plays on my mind and makes me feel almost sad every day ..

OP posts:
WingBingo · 07/06/2022 09:43

Not at all. Most mums at the school gate around here are late 30s/ early 40s.

I am 47 with DCs 7&8

passport123 · 07/06/2022 09:45

How many do you want? I'd plan to be TTC with your last child before 35 for safety.

TedMullins · 07/06/2022 09:46

Do you want kids? It’s not compulsory.

inmyslippers · 07/06/2022 09:49

They're such hard work. I'm one and done. Sometimes feel guilty he's an only but I think you should only have a child if it's all consuming not half heartedly. But you've a few years left.
Fertility declines with age, also more likely to have disabilities, health issues ext with older parents.

Chocolatelabradors · 07/06/2022 09:50

At 30 I had just got divorced, by 40 I had a 3 year old and a baby - you just have to roll with it I think and not over think things

LadyApplejack · 07/06/2022 10:08

I had my kids in my late 20s and felt among the youngest! Definitely very normal around here to start in your 30s.

If you know you want a family I wouldn't wait beyond about 33 to start in case it puts time pressure on your fertility - but I see no reason to start tomorrow either!

pastypam · 07/06/2022 11:51

I definitely want kid/s.
But I'm scared. I think it's the fear that's got me back peddling all the time, I'm terrified of being pregnant, I'm terrified of birth, and I'm terrified at how much it'll change my life... which I presume are all relatively normal feelings. But I'm just beating myself up continuously at the moment about it - feeling like I'm being judged all the time by others having babys with their partners..
I've been hesitant expressing my feelings currently with hubby too. As I feel I'm acting abit crazy ... I know he also wants kids. It's something we've spoken about often but recently it's just been sort of radio silence on the matter..
I'm not sure how many I'd like ether, I always find it hard to say before becoming a mother.

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.