Which method of contraception would you use if you were me?

[Pippaandpolly]

I was on the pill for years in my early 20s-Microgynon and a couple of different ones that I can't remember the names of as the GP kept switching it to try and alleviate side effects of weight gain and headaches. I then had the implant which was hellish-gained 3st, lost all libido, very depressed. I went back on the pill because I couldn't bear it but then gave up on that too as we got married and decided to just use condoms as, although we weren't trying to have a baby, it wouldn't have been a disaster, and it avoided hormonal contraceptives. That was fine, if finickity and not very sexy, as condoms are! We then stopped using them for a year or so until I got pregnant and our baby is now 5 months. We've been using condoms since she was born but I'm worried because we really, really don't want to get pregnant again any time soon and I can't help but view condoms as safe-but-not-that-safe.

Instinct says anything with hormones in has the potential to be disastrous. I have been working really hard to lose weight and don't want anything making it more difficult, plus I'm prone to depression and don't want to end up back on anti-depressants.

The IUD looks perfect except for the side effect of having longer, heavier periods. Mine are 10-12 days ordinarily and very heavy for about a week of that time so I'm loathe to use something that will make them worse.

So which is the best of a bad lot?! Condoms, which are less effective, the pill which might mess with my head and body again, or the IUD which could make my periods worse? Argh. I suppose I could pick one of the latter two and try it for a bit but I just don't want to be faffing around with this.

Maybe we should just abstain for a couple of years...

IUD, but not the one that release hormones as they can have the same effect as the implant. I find that the pill and implants sent me absolutely loopy. If the IUD makes your periods worse you can always have it removed.

Cerazette which is a mini pill is OK and (joyfully for me) made my periods stop all together, which was fantastic.

Have you see this tool here which guides you through what is best for you based on a questionnaire about you and your lifestyle?

contraception questionnaire

I think you're probably right - I'm just wary of having it put in and then having to have it taken out, though I guess it's not a big deal if that happens. I like that link! It suggested the IUS (hormone releasing) but I don't think I want to go down that route due to the implant craziness. Guess I need to go and talk to the GP.

Pippa - have you considered combining 'fertility awareness' (natural method involving careful charting) with condoms? We're ttc now but I used this for years and really liked it. For loads of reasons (migraines, family history of DVT, mental health stuff etc) I was contra-indicated for any hormones. It's a bit of a project to learn the method (I learnt from the book 'Taking Charge of Your Fertility') but once you have it's really flexible because it just gives you all the info about where you are - so for instance if, like you, it's really important to completely avoid pregnancy you could abstain completely (or do other stuff) for a week or so when you are most fertile and then use condoms the rest of the time. I did various things over the years, but with two long-term partners I used condoms until after ovulation was confirmed and then nothing at all afterwards (because I'm slightly allergic to condoms and get sore after a while). With my dp we were really serious quite quickly so after about six months we only used condoms when I was definitely fertile and did without the rest of the time (both beginning of cycle and the last fortnight) because it was nicer and an accident wouldn't have been a disaster.

You do need to be quite good at taking your temperature every day etc, but you don't need to have a regular cycle at all for it to work (mine never have been).

You could also try a copper coil and start charting at the same time (since it doesn't stop you ovulating). That way if you didn't get on with it you'd have learnt more about your cycle anyway.

The other possibility I considered but never got round to trying was being fitted for a diaphragm and using that as well as condoms for added security at my most fertile times.

slaps forehead at own stupidity

I charted for months when we were trying to conceive!

I had completely forgotten that this is a viable option. Ok, back to Toni Weschler I go for a refresher course...

Thank you!

There is a chapter or two on tta!

Purely anecdotal but if it's any reassurance - I charted for contraception for about four and a half years without getting pregnant. We decided to ttc at Christmas and conceived immediately (that cycle). Unfortunately I had a v. early miscarriage in January just a few days after the positive test but I suspect I may be pregnant again already as I feel rough in just the weird way I did a month ago.

Point here is not to boast about my apparent ease of conception but that the contraceptive method I was using was obviously pretty effective!

Good to know-and can definitely combine with condoms where necessary. Sorry about your miscarriage-I hope you're pregnant again soon (or now ).