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Original poster

The snip for him or for me? Help!

8 replies

BellaLEL · 12/01/2012 11:57

Hi, I'm a 25 year old mum of, soon to be, 3 children and my husband is 24. We have decided that this is it now, no more! At first I was saying that I'll get a sterilisation but loads of women were saying NO! My Mum was telling me that I'm too young and you apparently get side effects such as menopause. After hearing this my husband said that he'll get the snip instead. But then people were still saying you're too young and some say that men sometimes struggle to get aroused after having it done! Thing is, I know doctors will or may object to the idea too and say they need to make sure that we're 100% certain, given our age. Obviously it's reversible but we wont want that anyway. The only other option that doctors may feel more comfortable with is if I get contraception. I'm not allowed to take the pill (something to do with my blood), the injection makes me put on weight, and I've heard the coil is good but not 100% effective. The coil I'd say yes to but the last thing I want is to fall pregnant again and have to consider an abortion! Any advise? Has anyone been in a similar position? xxx

OP posts:
Snorbs · 12/01/2012 13:44

Vasectomies are sometimes reversible. But often not. There can be long-term issues with vasectomies but they're pretty rare. Most complications resolve themselves within a few weeks or maybe months.

But as female sterilisation is a more serious operation there can be long-term issues with that, too. Given the choice, I'd say vasectomy is the way to go as it's the simpler operation and the safer choice as you don't need a general anaesthetic (and I say that as a man who has had a vasectomy and did experience complications from it for a good few months).

Unfortunately it is the case that few GPs will consider permanent sterilisation for people in their 20s. As you already have children you might be able to persuade your GP to do in on the NHS but you may very well not. It might be worth giving your local family planning clinic a call. You could almost certainly get it done privately though.

Original poster
BellaLEL · 12/01/2012 14:15

Thank you for your advise. Yeah, since I posted this I have been doing my research on a number of professional health websites such as patient.co.uk which does say that a vasectomy is easier and less complicated than a sterilisation.

Only problem I encountered was that they say that Doctors will not be so convinced if we're making this decision after a 'change in our circumstances' eg - a new baby. Which is what it is for us really. I'm heavily pregnant with our 3rd and we wanted this as soon as we agreed not to get an abortion.

Suppose I'll have to do some research on private health clinics that offer this as it may well be the road we go down.

Thanks again :)

OP posts:
coffeesleeve · 27/01/2012 15:12

You won't get the menopause from being sterilised. You will also continue to get you periods. All sterilisation does is block or sever the fallopian tube (the tube that carries the egg to the uterus) - it does not remove your ovaries or womb.

I had the snip when I was in my mid-20s and to be honest it was a pretty easy operation - a day case, with a week off work afterwards. I couldn't lift anything for about 2 weeks afterwards. I think it'd be more brutal if I had it a bit older.

But both sterilisation and vasectomy are PERMANENT. Yes, they can be reversed, but the NHS won't fund it and the success rates are very low. You have to be completely 100% sure befoe you do it, as there's no going back (think of it like getting a tattoo - you can try to get it removed, but it'll be an awful process and might not work!).

fluffyanimal · 27/01/2012 15:17

Just to let you know, many GP's won't even refer older women for sterilisation if there is no medical reason to do so. I'm 40 and have been begging my GP to get my tubes tied but have been told that it wouldn't be considered. I had to get the Mirena coil instead, which is great, but I'm paranoid about it dropping out or not working.

fluffyanimal · 27/01/2012 15:20

Also, I mentioned to my GP that DH didn't want to get the snip, which would be my preferred choice, but she told me not to push it with him. She said that lots of men think it can lead to erectile problems, and while physically it doesn't affect performance, if men believe it can then it can. Also, if the man feels persuaded into it, that can affect performance. So if your DH did go for the snip, he should feel 100% sure it was what he wanted to do.

foxeeroxee · 29/02/2012 04:32

Hi! I was in same situation as you-am 25 with 3 dc and only last week got told that dr would sterilise me. :-D
My advice would be to research the op itself and reasons why dr may not do it eg age of u/youngest, what would happen if u n oh were to split etc so u are fully able to answer drs concerns
if u def want it doing be prepared to fight tooth and nail for it!!
Good luck :-D
X
ps no contreception is 100% iv been pregnant 4 times...3 concieved on pill and 1 whil i had a coil in! :O

foxeeroxee · 29/02/2012 04:35

Pps my youngest will be 14weeks when i get it done....the week after i turn 26! Thiugh they may ask u to wait till dc3 turns 2.... :-s apparently those are usually the rules.

catsareevil · 29/02/2012 04:51

The Mirena coil is more effective than female sterilisation, which has a 1 in 200 failure rate.

Being sterilised wont bring on the menopause.

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