Autumn / Winter music thread - 2026/2027

[northerngoldilocks]

Time for a new thread for the new school year!

Come and talk about music lessons, choosing instruments, exams, auditions, specialist schools, orchestras or whatever other music activities are going on. Everyone is welcome, from those with total beginners to those whose children are studying music at advanced levels. Ask for advice or share successes or struggles.

DS who is a bit older than 13, doesn't need the push but high school I found was the separating point between those for whom music was life, and for those it was a hobby. And that's fine. So maybe tell him that there are 3 set evenings a week where no matter how much homework there is he has to practice at a set time. And then he has to fit in the homework around that. And yes, lists help too. DS1 and I will still make some lists of what we wants to get done for the week.

That sounds a good compromise. Three evenings a week isn’t too onerous, and seems less of a chore. If it’s baked in as part of the routine and ‘deal’ it should work!

DS only really practices when he has grades or lessons with his scary teacher. His sightreading is such that he can get away with a lot.

We got a bit of outside help when the practising was hard - DD1 had a french teacher whose son was into his music and when she worked out what DD was upto she basically forced her HoY to give her a mentor who was an NYO musician in a higher year that she could talk it through.

Teachers can help too - our piano teacher was all lined up and ready having seen the issues around the transition to secondary many times. She produced a practice grid in the summer of year 6 that she expected to be filled in daily to say what had been done and how much time had been spent on it - eg scales/piece 1/piece 2/sightreading etc. It worked so well DD now inflicts it on her own pupils......

@wearyparent1 I think that the comms on the number of NYO students who came via Inspire was very carefully worded - and i wonder if those who do the Unite days because they got through to a final round of auditions (but would otherwise be ineligible for Inspire) would be counted in that number.

In any event - whilst NYO is undoubtedly a brilliant opportunity for those who get in, it is in national terms a really small number of players who could be involved in any one year just in terms of spaces available and not the only option for higher level ensemble. I assume yours is violin - i've been looking at the National Strings Courses as well as English Schools Orchestra as alternative options.

DD is at the Unite Day today in Saffron Walden - its the first year she's been old enough so hoping she has a great time. Waiting to hear on LSSO for her too where i think that her audition went well but the comments they made gave me a slight concern they might be thinking she could do it in later years. Will see. DS also auditioned - flute and piccolo - entertainingly he said that the tutors doing his audition didn't have earplugs so just stuck their fingers in their ears when he started playing piccolo. Its totally understandable and a reasonable thing to do but also made me laugh as perhaps not the most encouraging thing to see!

We were offered a unite day despite not making it to final round but he didn’t want to do it as was feeling really demotivated by it all. I believe NYSO is really good, and we had a good experience of LSSO also. Not violin but another string instrument- strings seems crazy competitive.

@northerngoldilocks fingers in ears for piccolo is hilarious! I hope it didn’t put him off too much!

@whirlingswirlingsaucepan there are some overlaps between sport and music obviously - physical and mental discipline, perseverance, teamwork. But music is a massive intellectual and emotional challenge on top of those things - you’re aiming for artistry, not just technical mastery, and that usually means understanding of cultural and musical contexts as well as just what it takes to move an audience. I don’t think you can really get any of that from sport, though I am a bit biased! (And obviously there are things that sport gives them that music doesn’t too).

Ive got an 8 year old (young year 4) who does swimming, football, cubs, violin and is a chorister so I do worry about packing too much in. He’s actually not great at football though loves doing it with his friends, but is otherwise very sporty - v fast runner, great at climbing and table tennis and learned to swim very quickly - I think he hasn’t actually found his sport yet and no doubt he would do if he wasn’t doing so much music, so I’m conscious of that and hope to keep exposing him to different opportunities while he’s young. It’s all a bit of a balancing act!

I think the sport/ music thing will be different for everyone. Some people thrive on doing both to a high level, some hate any form of sport. Mine have always done something alongside their music, partly for fun, but increasingly they recognise the mental health benefits and the fact that it supports their music to stay fit. At various times it's been gymnastics, swimming, running, gym. Never really competing though apart from the occasional event. Probably comes down to money, time and effort required and impact on family life.

With regards to NYO, they certainly don't prioritise state school players over those from independent schools, I can see that just in the players I've seen that I know, but they do rightly shout about the balance continuing to improve. Where only about 7percent of children attend independent schools, they are still vastly overrepresented. Obviously this is a blunt tool as children can be in an independent school for various reasons but there is 'in general ' a big divide between what is on offer in the two sectors music-wise. The inspire programme in no way guarantees a place in the orchestra. I think anyone going for an audition in any orchestra will face challenges and it's how they react to rejection that helps them develop. It's hard when you know they are probably good enough to get in, but so is almost everyone else who applies. There are so many other opportunities around, people here can definitely talk about which courses have been good for different levels of players. In the same way, competitions are extremely fickle and you enter hopefully with your eyes open to this and see it as something you learn from.
We have this dilemma with the local round of a competition where the judges have not been that great previously and the categories they have set up means some less good players get awards above others but we know this when we enter and just have to accept it as it's a rare school performance opportunity.

Practice is really tricky as by 13, I think they have to want to do it. Perhaps time to see if it is the right instrument, the right teacher, the right style, the right goals (some people dislike grades). If they want to continue, maybe help putting a realistic plan in place if they want to practice but find getting down to it hard. My eldest didn't really practice as such but played most evenings as relaxation and we were happy to keep on his lessons as he enjoyed it.

Just popping by to send best wishes to everyone in the UCAS/Conservatoires process.
My DD is now starting her PhD in Theory and Composition...

Interested to know if anyone on here has had this problem: child can happily do the hard stuff but absolutely not the basics.

DS9 is good at music. Doing Grade 7 on cello and organ, very useful member of a string quartet and a couple of adult orchestras, can accompany Suzuki gatherings on cello playing harmony against 30 kids on melody, accompanies choirs on organ, sang the Duruflé Requiem last night entirely under his own steam in an adult choir (1-3 per part) as the only Alto 1 (and was loud and perfectly in tune), can independently sightsing alto parts by himself against 15 choristers who all have to be intensively taught the top line, has just won the junior (under-16) section of a national composition competition, has in the past blasted his way through chorister auditions, etc.

However, he is also the most utterly gormlessly useless member of a unison treble/sop choir. He instantly goes off into autopilot and stands there with his mouth hanging open. Usually with his music upside down or closed. When asked what he was thinking afterwards it'll usually be something about hydrology or meteorology or electric car engines. He has zero shame and zero stage presence.

People who haven't encountered him being the sole harmony part/ alto/ accompanist all think he's absolutely useless, uninterested, unmusical and thick. Indeed the DoMs who have seen him being useful, also think he's an utterly useless member of a children's choir, and say they will never give him anything harder if he can't do the basics right. Same in Suzuki gatherings where he's required to play the same as everyone else.

He now feels rejected because other kids "who can't even sing the right notes IN TUNE, Mum!!!" think he's an idiot, and they are constantly given solos to do. They're the ones with stage presence who look at the conductor and smile, of course. Suzuki teachers at workshops who don't know him also treat him as though he has absolutely no idea what he's doing.

How does one inculcate stage presence and useful herd behaviour? Or do I just admit defeat?

Does he want to be in the children’s choir @DitheringMusicParent? Maybe he finds it boring? He sounds very busy - could he just drop the stuff that he doesn’t play ball in? Guessing it doesn’t work to just give him a set of instructions about how to stand and where to look?

My DS is a chorister but does not contribute enthusiastically to his school Christmas performances (the class singing a non-religious song about snowmen or similar in unison to a backing track) - I think he finds it embarrassing because none of the other boys really try to sing properly. If it was an optional activity I would not bother with it!

@Incertus unfortunately access to the organ is contingent on being in the choir, otherwise I

(Oops) would have dropped the choir!

It's tricky because at 9 they maybe haven't developed the understanding that they sometimes need to contribute to things where they are above the level and it's about supporting friends and staff. Maybe he's not quite ready for that and needs to have a break from those things so he doesn't get fed up? One of mine is in the very basic school orchestra and attends weekly even though she could sight read in the concert , because she wants to support people. But she's much older. It's probably a hard concept for a younger child.

That aspect definitely wouldn’t occur to him naturally (I have suggested it many times). I think it’s a complete lack of him thinking of himself as being perceived at all by others, combined with his attention wandering in boring music and him having no real idea about how little he is singing. Pathological ADHD…

For me boring school orchestra rehearsals were mitigated by working on something else about my playing. So I might be practicing doing a different sort of vibrato or smooth bow changes or something.

I'm wondering is there something about his singing that he could be working on in group settings to keep his mind on the singing. If it is stage presence, what does he actually need to do mechanically to make that happen? Is it the glance at music, memorise next line, sing at conductor or audience thing? (Or DD doesn't like looking at people so she picks a spot on the back wall). Acting skills?

I explain to mine that they're lucky that they find some things easy but there are other things that other children find easy and they need to consciously work on. Stage presence is definitely one for DD too.

Also to add - there comes a point where they grow out of the suzuki play through everything together thing. Any good non Suzuki cello teachers around you?

I agree with @thirdfiddle that trying to find something else to focus on might help - certainly in choral singing you should watch the conductor so developing the ability to do a quick glance down and then eyes up would be an invaluable skill to learn - if he doesn't want to watch his face he could learn to watch his hands (even more so for an organist). Spotting conductor quirks ( a bit like bingo) can be fun too if he's bored (and also get his head out of his copy).....

I think it sounds more like an autistic trait than ADHD @DitheringMusicParent , social mimicking is often being trained via ABA but it's becoming controversial too as masking leads to burnout, sooner or later. If it's not absolutely necessary for progress, it would probably be better to leave it for the time being. 9 is still young in terms of brain maturity, even for girls and the more so for autistic boys. They will have to learn social skills anyway but at their own pace. I would keep discussing the social side of things as autistic people often approach this from the intellectual, analytical point of view, but wouldn't do specific behavioural training just yet.

Watching Young Musician OTY. Amazing.

incredible. Very well deserved.

Ds has had a great weekend in London playing for 2 sold out concerts with a professional band. (One of those film with live music ones). It also helped his friend was playing with him too.

a few weeks off now until panto starts.

@ElizaSchuyler sounds like some lovely opportunities coming along, must be hard work doing panto!
We really enjoyed the BBCYM musician too. I don't want to comment on individuals but it's a shame the format changed so some of them can no longer say they were strictly speaking category finalists as they also had 'wildcards'. Competitions are so fickle but I hope they all had a positive experience and it opens doors for them. There's several of them I'd love to hear again live.

@horseymum I haven’t seen young musician yet but everything I read said that all the finalists were excellent and choosing between them must have been so hard - especially as so different. I do agree though that it’s a shame they no longer win the instrument class as eg the pianist is no longer the winner of that class.