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Extra-curricular activities

Find advice on the best extra curricular activities in secondary schools and primary schools here.

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Autumn / Winter 2025 Music

981 replies

northerngoldilocks · 31/08/2025 12:39

Time for a new thread in time for the new school term!

Come and talk about music lessons, choosing instruments, exams, auditions, specialist schools, orchestras or whatever other music activities are going on. Everyone is welcome, from those with total beginners to those whose children are studying music at advanced levels. Ask for advice or share successes or struggles.

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9
horseymum · 17/12/2025 07:46

I love all the concerts in December! We have been fortunate to have choir, wind band, orchestra, school orchestra, three carol services and still have our own church carol service. Hoping to watch a friend conducting a professional orchestra too.
@BurntOutParent your child sounds very accomplished doing all that at 9! Accompanying a choir is very tricky. My youngest has just moved to playing piano at church from doing bass guitar. Her least favourite bit is doing the introduction! I think there are lots of neuro diverse people in the music world ( perhaps even more in the organ world, just a feeling not based on data) I'm sure he will find his niche. Maybe a specialist school or a junior department of a conservatoire might be of interest in the future. Mine have certainly made good friends there as have others on here. I just let them enjoy different opportunities and see where it takes them.

QueenMabby · 17/12/2025 07:59

Ours are all done. Dd just had her school’s 9 lessons and carols service (very popular and done over two nights) where she sang all kinds of reportoire. My favourite was one called Bethlehem Down which I’d not heard before. She’ll be picking up her choir pay this morning (cash in a brown envelope!).

We have carol singing this weekend - just around local roads to raise money for charity which will be nice.

Next term is looking reasonably clear - a strings competition and the school musical (Legally Blonde).

Merry Christmas everyone!

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 08:34

horseymum · 17/12/2025 07:46

I love all the concerts in December! We have been fortunate to have choir, wind band, orchestra, school orchestra, three carol services and still have our own church carol service. Hoping to watch a friend conducting a professional orchestra too.
@BurntOutParent your child sounds very accomplished doing all that at 9! Accompanying a choir is very tricky. My youngest has just moved to playing piano at church from doing bass guitar. Her least favourite bit is doing the introduction! I think there are lots of neuro diverse people in the music world ( perhaps even more in the organ world, just a feeling not based on data) I'm sure he will find his niche. Maybe a specialist school or a junior department of a conservatoire might be of interest in the future. Mine have certainly made good friends there as have others on here. I just let them enjoy different opportunities and see where it takes them.

Based on the organists I’ve met I’d say there are a LOT of ND “Aspie” types there but I do wonder if the extreme ADHDers like DS9 have been screened out by lacking the exec function skills to cope. DS9 is ok for now since people just talk to me and hand his music to me etc, but soon it will be him by himself at youth orchestra or playing the organ without me in tow, and I suspect that will go quite badly, other than the actual playing of music…

achangeofnameisasgoodasarest · 17/12/2025 09:01

School christmas is over here, but DD2 has a couple of orchestra courses and the church carol service in which she is apparently playing bassoon, flute AND singing (at different points) - none of it will be rehearsed for her as she's got to come and do it in between an orchestra rehearsal and a performance. She should be fine as it's just carols for choirs but she's a big old worrier at the moment.

Even DD1 is getting in on the act for church with her viola, but realising just how much not having picked it up for a term is impacting her ability to sightread. At least she has rehearsed though.

@BurntOutParent DD2 is at specialist school and reckons pretty much all the musicians are ND. She doesn't have a diagnosis, but the school is still kind with her 'quirks' (bringing your own fork to lunch anyone?), for which we are grateful!

However, I think organ scholars often have to also conduct the choir, which might be a harder thing to do if you don't do that kind of interaction. he's still really young and sounds brilliant - he might completely surprise you with strategies to deal with it all as he gets older. Hope the christmas season goes well.

Compsearch · 17/12/2025 09:15

@BurntOutParent Im not sure many 9 year olds have good executive function, especially 9yo boys?! Not minimising your DS’ condition at all but he has lots of maturing to do as well. What an amazing opportunity and responsibility to play with the choir!

DS is singing in the crib service at Southwark on Christmas Eve (he’s a junior probationer) - his first “professional” gig (as he puts it!). We are all really looking forward it.

thirdfiddle · 17/12/2025 09:26

One step at a time I reckon. You can attend with him now and will be able to for years to come. As that environment becomes more familiar to him, who knows.

If there are opportunities you think would suit him, talk to the youth orchestras etc. Every child is different but these orgs are very keen to be accessible and will try to find ways to make it work.

Also bear in mind community/amateur orchestras as an option. Community would be mixed standard, something he could do now. But at the appropriate stage lots of grade 8+ amateur orchestras are open to kids, DD plays in ours as it's a much higher standard than the local youth orchestra. One orchestra I used to play in had a young member who was blind and severely autistic, attended with a (musical) support worker.

Talk to people, they're very keen to help.

thirdfiddle · 17/12/2025 09:27

thirdfiddle · 17/12/2025 09:26

One step at a time I reckon. You can attend with him now and will be able to for years to come. As that environment becomes more familiar to him, who knows.

If there are opportunities you think would suit him, talk to the youth orchestras etc. Every child is different but these orgs are very keen to be accessible and will try to find ways to make it work.

Also bear in mind community/amateur orchestras as an option. Community would be mixed standard, something he could do now. But at the appropriate stage lots of grade 8+ amateur orchestras are open to kids, DD plays in ours as it's a much higher standard than the local youth orchestra. One orchestra I used to play in had a young member who was blind and severely autistic, attended with a (musical) support worker.

Talk to people, they're very keen to help.

Sorry, quote got lost, that was to burntoutparent.

Londonmummy66 · 17/12/2025 10:38

@compsearch - enjoy the crib service - I remember mine doing it as their first "gig" - exciting times.

@BurntOutParent I remember working with one very talented but v autistic young organist many years ago. He was only really able to accompany but also ran the music library with brutal precision. There are a number of roles for organists who accompany but don't direct (and even more for pianists to accompany amateur choral societies) so I don't think he will be short of opportunities. There will be posts he wouldn't be suitable for - eg most cathedral "organists" spend most of their time directing but many big churches have separate posts for a choirmaster and an organist.

amr78 · 17/12/2025 11:40

@BurntOutParent my DS15 was diagnosed with AuADHD earlier this year. He got grade 8 distinction on clarinet in year 9 and grade 8 distinction jazz sax in year 10. He’s high masking and in years 7-9 did manage to juggle academic demands alongside his music scholarship commitments and out of school ensembles. Unfortunately, the wheels came off musically after his grade 8 clarinet - he went from grade 6 to 8 in a year which was really intense and he burned out. He had to drop out of the county youth orchestra last year as the 3 hour rehearsals and social demands were too much and he now no longer is able to really do any ensembles outside of school which means he’s not being challenged. There’s no point in him auditioning for national ensembles because he wouldn’t manage the social aspects of a residential. He’s now in year 11 and the academic demands have ramped up singificantly so he’s constantly on the edge of autistic burn out. He’s had his first episodes of emotionally based school avoidance this term. He no longer practices his instruments from one week to the next as he simply hasn’t got the bandwidth to fit it all in alongside homework.
He intends to study music at A-level but has no interest in pursuing it professionally as he recognises what a difficult profession it is and that he’s unlikely to earn much money! I just hope that he continue to enjoy his music in some capacity beyond school.
It sounds like your DS is doing amazingly. I hope he can continue to flourish with music. It’s such a hard journey for ND kids, even if they’ve got good support behind them.

Ubertomusic · 17/12/2025 17:09

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 08:34

Based on the organists I’ve met I’d say there are a LOT of ND “Aspie” types there but I do wonder if the extreme ADHDers like DS9 have been screened out by lacking the exec function skills to cope. DS9 is ok for now since people just talk to me and hand his music to me etc, but soon it will be him by himself at youth orchestra or playing the organ without me in tow, and I suspect that will go quite badly, other than the actual playing of music…

Show quote history

Extreme ADHD usually requires medication, as for the executive function it will develop over time, even if not to an NT level. I have a young adult DS with ASD who did struggle with it, especially in teenage years, but now manages reasonably well in his independent life.

ASD is a very wide spectrum of course but high functioning "Aspies" often find their niche.

Ubertomusic · 17/12/2025 19:13

DD had an unusually (?) busy November, with one big show, three orchestral concerts, two solo performances, two assessments - all this is just on one instrument, plus two dance shows and some choir singing in between... I thought end of year was the busiest season but it looks like I was wrong? What is your experience? I don't know how to plan for the year ahead as some performances were short notice from the school. I need to figure out how to predict the workload...

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 21:38

achangeofnameisasgoodasarest · 17/12/2025 09:01

School christmas is over here, but DD2 has a couple of orchestra courses and the church carol service in which she is apparently playing bassoon, flute AND singing (at different points) - none of it will be rehearsed for her as she's got to come and do it in between an orchestra rehearsal and a performance. She should be fine as it's just carols for choirs but she's a big old worrier at the moment.

Even DD1 is getting in on the act for church with her viola, but realising just how much not having picked it up for a term is impacting her ability to sightread. At least she has rehearsed though.

@BurntOutParent DD2 is at specialist school and reckons pretty much all the musicians are ND. She doesn't have a diagnosis, but the school is still kind with her 'quirks' (bringing your own fork to lunch anyone?), for which we are grateful!

However, I think organ scholars often have to also conduct the choir, which might be a harder thing to do if you don't do that kind of interaction. he's still really young and sounds brilliant - he might completely surprise you with strategies to deal with it all as he gets older. Hope the christmas season goes well.

@achangeofnameisasgoodasarest Yes, I'm well aware of hte need to conduct the choir... and to interact successfully with people, as well as being monumentally well organised as an organ scholar on top of an undergrad course... the way DS is heading he won't get into anywhere that has organ scholar positions, but that does leave the question of what he is going to do instead... (European conservatory? Birmingham?)

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 21:50

thirdfiddle · 17/12/2025 09:26

One step at a time I reckon. You can attend with him now and will be able to for years to come. As that environment becomes more familiar to him, who knows.

If there are opportunities you think would suit him, talk to the youth orchestras etc. Every child is different but these orgs are very keen to be accessible and will try to find ways to make it work.

Also bear in mind community/amateur orchestras as an option. Community would be mixed standard, something he could do now. But at the appropriate stage lots of grade 8+ amateur orchestras are open to kids, DD plays in ours as it's a much higher standard than the local youth orchestra. One orchestra I used to play in had a young member who was blind and severely autistic, attended with a (musical) support worker.

Talk to people, they're very keen to help.

@thirdfiddle thanks - yes he already plays in a children's orchestra (where he copes fine playing, as long as I've already organised his music, but any attempts at conversation with other kids are met with him being ignored or bullied), and an adult community orchestra (where thankfully the adults are a bit nicer to him).

And he has an amateur orchestra in his sights ("Grade 8+" but probably ok musically for him now as they're always desperate for cellos), but I'm not letting him do it yet as that would be too many intense and exhausting late nights per week along with choir, children's orchestra etc.

We'll see if the local youth orchestra and the national secondary schools' orchestra are realistic goals socially, by the time he is old enough, or if he just bypasses them (because of the social aspect) and plays with adults...

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 22:02

Londonmummy66 · 17/12/2025 10:38

@compsearch - enjoy the crib service - I remember mine doing it as their first "gig" - exciting times.

@BurntOutParent I remember working with one very talented but v autistic young organist many years ago. He was only really able to accompany but also ran the music library with brutal precision. There are a number of roles for organists who accompany but don't direct (and even more for pianists to accompany amateur choral societies) so I don't think he will be short of opportunities. There will be posts he wouldn't be suitable for - eg most cathedral "organists" spend most of their time directing but many big churches have separate posts for a choirmaster and an organist.

@Londonmummy66 Thanks - yes I imagine directing is going to be a struggle because of the multitasking and motor skills required (unless someone brings back Lully-style banging a stick on the floor...). Organist jobs seem more realistic. He needs to start piano next year (he went straight onto organ at age 6), given that most accompanying/ repetiteuring is piano work. If only ballet schools still needed pianists, that'd be a perfect way of getting him fluent...

BurntOutParent · 17/12/2025 22:10

amr78 · 17/12/2025 11:40

@BurntOutParent my DS15 was diagnosed with AuADHD earlier this year. He got grade 8 distinction on clarinet in year 9 and grade 8 distinction jazz sax in year 10. He’s high masking and in years 7-9 did manage to juggle academic demands alongside his music scholarship commitments and out of school ensembles. Unfortunately, the wheels came off musically after his grade 8 clarinet - he went from grade 6 to 8 in a year which was really intense and he burned out. He had to drop out of the county youth orchestra last year as the 3 hour rehearsals and social demands were too much and he now no longer is able to really do any ensembles outside of school which means he’s not being challenged. There’s no point in him auditioning for national ensembles because he wouldn’t manage the social aspects of a residential. He’s now in year 11 and the academic demands have ramped up singificantly so he’s constantly on the edge of autistic burn out. He’s had his first episodes of emotionally based school avoidance this term. He no longer practices his instruments from one week to the next as he simply hasn’t got the bandwidth to fit it all in alongside homework.
He intends to study music at A-level but has no interest in pursuing it professionally as he recognises what a difficult profession it is and that he’s unlikely to earn much money! I just hope that he continue to enjoy his music in some capacity beyond school.
It sounds like your DS is doing amazingly. I hope he can continue to flourish with music. It’s such a hard journey for ND kids, even if they’ve got good support behind them.

@amr78 Sorry to hear about wheels falling off, that is really hard. I hope he finds his way out of burnout (could a year out help?).

We get round that currently by homeschooling, as schools here are in crisis mode and DS reached total burnout by 18 months into school. It is great for hours spent on music, but does him no favours socially though...

horseymum · 18/12/2025 08:26

I think you just have to take things as they come a bit. At 9, mine was only playing hot cross buns on the instrument which would take them to conservatoire, I didn't know what a junior department was and had never met anyone who went to a specialist school and hadn't heard of the NYO.
My top tip for socialising is teaching them some card games as mine have always done that on courses etc. Might not work for everyone but worth a try. Also, they don't have to socialise if they don't want to but hopefully any decent organisation would come down on any bullying.
I guess ultimately my aim is that mine have a lifelong love of music, whatever that looks like.

ViolaMa · 18/12/2025 08:36

We had ds’ college concert last night. It was amazing! The big band started off, then the night finished with orchestra, in between there were several choirs including gospel, and flute, sax, clarinet ensembles. Best of all ds seems inspired to join chamber choir and the Latin percussion ensemble (in addition to the compulsory concert choir, string orchestra and full orchestra).

@BurntOutParent ds has asd and adhd
and was home educated until starting college this year. There is no way he would have managed anything residential until he started at a summer school when he was 13, even then he needed his own room to recover each evening. He’s definitely blossomed socially over the last couple of years and has lots of friends at college now. I think your ds will find his own way musically, it’s great that he’s already accompanying the choir, I think playing in ensembles and learning to listen to others has massively helped ds with social interactions.

Merry Christmas everyone!

yodaforpresident · 18/12/2025 11:12

Almost, all finished here for Christmas - school concert and two carol services (we also had Bethlehem Down@QueenMabby, my favourite was a rather beautiful Dies est laetitiae). Sadly DD missed her Festival concert as she came down with what we now think was flu, but thankfully recovered in time to go off on her school trip to the US - I think the vaccination the previous week must have reduced the impact, but quite a nasty illness nonetheless. Back in time for one rehearsal and then church Nine Lessons on Sunday. Looking forward to a lovely, restful Christmas now listening to lots of music and getting ready for some auditions that are due in January. Best wishes for Christmas to all!

musicadvice · 18/12/2025 12:18

Hello, hope it's OK to post on here. I have an 7 year old who has been learning piano for a year and violin for art 3 months. She loves both, especially piano. She rarely gets to listen to much instrumental / classical music at home. So for Xmas we want to get her a CD or record player and some music, so she has agency over what she listens to.

My Q: any idea of good fun albums where piano and or violin are central? another Q- do you think they need to be central in order to be inspiring? Perhaps I should just be asking for good instrumental albums for a 7 year old...

Comefromaway · 18/12/2025 12:21

Young Person's Guide to the Orchestra & Peter & the Wolf are always good starts.

Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini

musicadvice · 18/12/2025 12:24

Thank you @Comefromaway will look these up now! Any more ideas very welcome!

Comefromaway · 18/12/2025 12:33

Any ballet music

Siriusmuggle · 18/12/2025 12:48

I second Peter & the Wolf, played a huge part in my kid's love of classical music.

Siriusmuggle · 18/12/2025 12:54

musicadvice · 18/12/2025 12:24

Thank you @Comefromaway will look these up now! Any more ideas very welcome!

Also look out for 'pops' style classical concerts. I went the halle christmas concert last night and they did a fab suite from Frozen, my son used to love film music concerts etc. Now he won't consider anything lowerbrow than Mahler 😂

yodaforpresident · 18/12/2025 13:05

Carnival of the Animals by Saint Saens - there was a wonderful recording of a German orchestra (I think) on You Tube (I think) - I will see if I can find it. YY to Peter and the Wolf too - I think the ROH had a recording of this on their website?

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