Hobbies

[Firsttimeanxiousmum]

Things are starting to open up now and I'm thinking about groups/clubs for my 3yr8month old boy.
Some of his peers do swimming, gymnastics, rugby tots etc....

I guess my question is how do you know which hobbies to try? Should I be exposing him to multiple to see what he enjoys and then focusing on 1 or 2 longer time? Should I wait until he asks to do something? Is he too young for hobbies?

Please Help!!

Swimming is something they all need to learn at some point.

Otherwise, chose something you think he might like. Remember, you may be taking him for many years, so something you can tolerate...

Let him try things that fit in with your schedule, my older son plays football, my younger son never did as I cant be in two places at once on a Saturday morning. So he did other things instead. Swimming lessons aren't so much of a hobbies as a life skill so I think he should do those and maybe 1 other thing if you can afford it and have time.

Is there anything that you think might help his development? For example, DD struggles with coordination and has no upper body strength, so she does gymnastics. (She didn't crawl as a baby and finds it hard to climb up climbing frames). She likes gymnastics as she's interested in dance and wanted to wear a sparkly leotard.

Costs for different activities vary wildly. Also done activities take place year round whereas others are term time only.

Junior parkrun is great because it's free and takes place weekly.

I agree with others that swimming is a useful life skill.

Swimming is great but I’d perhaps wait to see if some of the covid restrictions ease things up a bit. It’s much more faffy and lots of places won’t have teachers in the water anymore for the 3 yos. My pool has suspended the pre-school classes. Gymnastics has been brilliant at that age for mine. They have to properly listen and concentrate and I think it is really good prep for school.

For me, as someone else said, swimming was not hobby it was essential life skill - but my dd happened to love it too. We did gym tots, story time and dance at that age.

Junior Parkrun is good but parents can't run with the kids at the moment....

Swimming is important but other than that - what do you think they will enjoy, what is nearby and convenient, what have friends recommended, what fits around other commitments and (in time) what do they ask to do?

Between them my two have done (not all at once!)
Gymnastics
Swimming
Trampolining
Football
Tennis
Cricket
Cycling
Triathlon
Rainbows
Brownies
Choir
Athletics

There is too much to do to be able to do everything but it is worth trying to find them something that they love.

I have successfully raised some activities loving children so I guess I am qualified to give advice :)

First of all, at this age my oldest didn’t do anything organized, she was in full time nursery. I did however take her to the pool for a year and taught her swimming myself. She started swimming lessons at 5, but generally I would start once the school starts. I would start swimming with a parent or in lessons ASAP so that your dc gets used to the pool.
Another activity I like is ballet or some other kind of dance because I feel it is the best introduction to music a small child can have - through movement.
Team sports are great when done with friends and a good coach (can be a parent of one of the kids - some parents make very good coaches, and some like me are rubbish).
In general good teacher and peer group is much more important than the nature of the activity at this age.
I think starting one-two activities by 5 is a good thing.
I would not wait until dc asks - how would they know what they like unless they try?

I say this both tongue in cheek and with utter sincerity: before you start any of them, I would ask yourself:

• can I tolerate having to spend half my life sitting around waiting for them (and the environment that entails - warm coffee shop v freezing pitch v poolside at 5am)

• can I potentially afford for them to be really good at this (both ££ and time)

When we sent DD at 3 to that first ballet class and drama class, I had zero idea that 9 years later it would be like having a second job and costing a sizeable fortune... although not as much as my neighbour who thought riding lessons might be fun... 2 horses later

@OhCrumbsWhereNow has a really good point. Here is my assessment of my list from above (my kids don’t compete in all the sports but I have friends who do)

Gymnastics - over competitive, brutal on the body and you spend all day at a competition where they compete for 4 minutes
Swimming - 5am starts
Trampolining - who’s broken a bone this week? Compete for less than 2 minutes at a competition 60 miles away
Football - cold wet and muddy, takes up the entire weekend
Tennis - there may be a bar! Kids have to score themselves and some of them cheat.
Cricket - takes up the entire weekend but thankfully only in the summer
Cycling - cold and wet, occasionally terrifying when your child is caught up in a nasty crash
Triathlon - rather lovely day out with a picnic but your child will vomit
Rainbows - so many badges to sew on
Brownies - yet more badges to sew on
Choir - the tuneless dirge of my non musical child practicing
Athletics - unless you put your child down as a foetus you have no chance at all of getting them into the really good club in the area

I think op was asking about tentative hobbies for a 3yo...how did this veer into competitive activities discussion?! Enrolling your child into swimming lessons does not imply future 5am starts...not at all!

True but having learnt the hard way, it's worth considering if you can actually afford to facilitate a hobby if they do get ultra keen.

I steered clear of horse-riding because I knew we could not begin to facilitate the kind of opportunities that friends whose children are seriously into it have. I would rather direct DD to a different hobby than have to tell sobbing child that yes, she might be very talented at it, but the garden is not big enough for a tortoise let alone the champion show jumper she has her heart set on!

I honestly thought at 3 that I was signing up for 2 hours of commitment a week. Within two years, that was 7 hours a week, plus an agent and all the parental commitment that involves, and it has increased every year since.

Most of my friends with children in the same industry fell into in exactly the same way and had no idea how much time and money it would lead to.

I find people on MN seem to get very serious about hobbies / extra curricular activities.

DD did 'toddler ballet'. She ran around in circles waving her arms. (One friend still does dance now at 16. DD didn't learn to skip until she was 8.)

DD did swimming lessons from age 3-12. Just pottering up the grades. No squads, 5am starts or excessive hours.

DD did drama. They did a play each year in a school hall. She did a 1 week workshop each summer. No thoughts of auditioning for touring pantomimes or having her name up in lights.

Doing things for fun and developing general skills, it doesn't have to be about competing, being the best or anything.

My eldest did in fact get serious about nearly every activity we tried - but clearly we enabled her. We could have easily said no to joining the swimming squad for example. And I have to agree that we drew a clear line at horses
But to seriously answer op’s question- of course you have to offer some things, like swimming lessons for example, if at all possible! My approach was to offer a range of things and see what sticks. You never know, you might yet be ok with 5am mornings (and they are more like 6am! And this doesn’t even start until a few years into club swimming so dc can become a very decent swimmer without ever swimming before school)

As your dc isn't even 4 yet, I'd say look into learning to swim, then leave things a bit until they are settled at school.
Then, it tends to be what parents either enjoyed themselves or wish they'd had a chance to do.

I'd reccomend putting their name down for Beavers - something like Scouts means you get to try all sorts of different activities.

One thing to consider is when the activity runs. When DS started school (having been fine with 3 days at nursery) he was absolutely shattered and any after school activity fell by the wayside. He just continued with swimming lessons.

Age 5 he picked his own sport after seeing a flyer. Still playing it 10 years later (DH & I do not play it).

I have a girl but she does:

1. Ballet / tap
2. Piano
3. Tennis
4. A little Spanish class with singing and games

She did swimming pre-covid and has done coding as well up until recently and is asking to do it again but there are only so many hours on the weekend I'm prepared to spend on kids activities.

I'd pick something sporty / physical and something musical / creative at this age and see how he gets on. Find an activity that friends are already doing is also good for keeping interest going and having parents you like to chat to while you wait around!

These are your options
Sports
Arts and Crafts
Language
Music/dance/drama type hobbies

Choose one and do not look back. I played tennis as a child and also learnt a language at school. Look at clubs in your area etc. To answer your question, no this is the perfect time to introduce him to a hobby.

I'd say swimming is really important, but can also be fun too!

Beavers/cubs/scouts is excellent as soon as he's old enough to join. They meet lots of people, do a huge range of activities and go on trips/camps. It's almost like every hobby you could hope for him in one meeting a week!

A good thing to remember is that the activity they do at 3 or 4 is not necessarily the activity they will do when they are older. In fact, let them try as many things as you can and let them choose what they like. But remember that good teacher and having friends in the same activity is often more important than the activity itself.

For my son I at age 4-5 I choose swimming (all my kids did swimming. It is life saving skill) and ballet (again all my kids did it because it offers a combination of music and movement in one activity). I have no idea what he will end up doing when he is older! Older DD stuck with swimming and now swims competitively for a club and also still loves dance and does it recreationally. She later added piano, then violin and singing. But she also tried tennis and gymnastics on the way.

One more piece of advice- try to find activities that are fun. There is a magazine called the family grapevine, which is really a directory for parents. In it you can find phone numbers for various activity providers etc, it is worth getting a copy in order to have a look at it.

If he's starting school in September I'd just keep it to swimming for now as they can get really tired in Reception.

Dd started ballet at 3, violin at 4, tap dance at 5, piano at 6, swimming and Brownies at 7.

She had a go at a few other things like gym and tennis but didn't take to it. We tried swimming at 4 and 4 but she had a water phobia and it was pointless.

I would say just start one thing and take it from there. Gradually add others but from about 6 onwards, they have a good sense of what they do and don't want to do.

*4 and 5