music teacher dilemma

[Mummy0ftwo12]

Has anyone else had a bit of a dilemma where it comes to music teachers? (DD has been having lessons for 16 months).

DD's current violin teacher is lovely, but off sick a lot, she teaches / plays many instruments and has a good reputation for getting exam passes and won't enter a child until she's very confident they will pass - oh and I really really like her as does DD, but find myself having to do a lot with DD in terms of teaching her especially when there are so many missed lessons - and the violin is not my forte, i played brass / piano - violin it seems rather tricky to make a consistently nice sound on the violin.

Teacher 2 is a professional violinist, she has a reputation in the local music shops as being the best violin teacher around, she had one lesson with DD and instantly spotted that she wasn't holding the violin incorrectly and her bowing technique isn't quite right - thanks to youtube we've been able to correct the first - she also told me that the sky is the limit and considering that aiming for a music scholarship in two years time is on the agenda.... but she's more old fashioned, stricter which DD (who is a bit of a butterfly) isn't used to and refuses to let parents watch any part of the lesson - no idea if she relies on the child to know what to practise or writes something down.

So - has anyone else had a similar dilemma?

Had the dilemma, but I don't think I can solve yours...

We mistakenly went for someone stricter/very well qualified, and it didn't work out (DD was grade 3ish at the time). This was brass, and he kept on at DD about her breathing and tonguing, but didn't seem to be able to explain or find a way to tackle it in a way that resonated with her. When she didn't improve, he kept just saying the same things over and over, rather than looking for other ways to conquer the problems. She's now with someone who is very relaxed about technique, and is enjoying lessons again and feeling more positive.

On the other hand, new teacher doesn't seem very organised, and her notes in the practice book make little sense to me, and the lesson is in school so I don't get to ask. DD is 13 so should be able to do the communication, but we're still battling a bit with the knock to her confidence from the previous teacher.

I think having someone they get on with is very important, but (particularly at the early stages) so are regular lessons, and attention to correct bowhold etc (when you say "teaches/plays many instruments" does that mean she's not primarily a violinist?). Perhaps look/ask around a bit more and see if you can find someone less daunting. When we changed teacher, we had trial lessons with a couple of possibilities - we paid for these, and both teachers were happy to do that (with me observing) knowing that we were trying someone else out as well.

By the way, I'd ignore the "music scholarship on the agenda" bit - Mr Strict-teacher went on at the outset about doing grade 8 by year 10, but changed his mind when her technique didn't improve as he thought it should. I think it was more a case of him saying he could get "a good pupil" from the current grade to that standard that quickly, rather than this particular pupil.

Ditto to previous poster. We've tried a v "erudite" teacher and it didn't work out for our DS, but it's the right fit for some DC and some families. For us, a teacher who listens to the child is really important (DS is autistic) whereas other DC can cope with much more direction. I learned that my children really do need to be praised. They don't need to be told they did it perfectly, but the odd "well done" when they've worked hard is needed. And I'm sure there are highly regarded teachers who do that.

I wonder if you need to find an option 3.

What do you want for your child/what does your daughter want? Do you want them to be serious about music/get scholarships/go to music school at the weekend or just enjoy it as a hobby? Answer this question first before you decide. If it’s the former then your daughter will need to knuckle down, need focus and discipline. Does she want to do that? Music is tough and competitive and she will need to get used to being criticised. If that’s what’s she wants then The more serious teacher may be the way forward.

If it’s the latter then I would strongly urge you to not go with the stricter teacher and not focus on getting exams. Find a teacher who she enjoys playing with and where she looks forward to practising and having lessons.

I agree the right teacher the right child.
We had strict and DD just dug her heels in and the relationship failed.
We moved to the less strict and dies cancel lessons due to illness, but DD is flying. With a place for professional training now.

Assuming that your DD is primary age, I would be very cautious of any violin teacher who did not welcome parental involvement in lessons. It is very difficult for youngsters to learn without consistent parental support, facilitated by the teacher.

I would, however, take what the strict teacher said about technique very seriously. There are many violin teachers around who do not give pupils the correct technical foundation. Awkward violin hold, bad intonation and tense, ‘crooked’ bowing (not parallel to the bridge) are all too common, and are a result of poor teaching rather than lack of talent/practice. If the set up isn’t right, tone and intonation will get worse rather than better, as the repertoire becomes more complex. Even beginners should play in tune and should have a pleasant sound - albeit with the occasional glitch! Playing should also never be painful.

I would advise you to continue your search - neither teacher sounds ideal, and it sounds like your DD has potential!

Also, do feel free to post on the spring term music thread. I am only an occasional poster these days because of privacy issues, but there is a wealth of expertise over there 🙂

I would stick with the teacher you like, maybe ask if you can have something to take you over any times she is ill.
Exams aren't everything, and can zap the fun out of music for many children.
Most of the best music schools in the world aren't interested in how many exams you have passed.
If you have the ability, they don't matter, even to attract funding.
Keep it fun and let your dd lead the way, is my advice.

I think as others have said you ideally need to find option 3! It's really important that your child has a teacher they get on well with and who gives them positive comments..however it's also important to get the basic techniques right, even if playing at a relatively early stage this will improve the rate of progress and they will feel more comfortable with the instrument. We were late to change one of our childrens' teachers who was not teaching her first study and allowed some bad habits to develop and it was a lot of hard work to sort out these issues later on.

thanks everyone, I've been using the online violin tutor to try and assist which has been great (its a youtube channel by one of the exam board examiners) and i can now help with tuning/intonation/making sure she holds the violin at a better angle, but bowing seems to be tricky
as she does seem to wander down the bridge which does not help the sound, and her current teacher thinks that it will come in time but as a pp said, i would rather she got get the basics right.

But sounds like switching to a stricter teacher may not be the best idea, so i will have a think and i will check out that sprint term music thread.

Please ignore the music scholarship spiel... they are trying to make out that they are a great teacher and your kid is gifted which they (a) can't know at that stage and (b) has too many other variables, they tell you what you want to hear. I heard all of that but dd was lazy, didn't practice, make it through grade 8 on sheer talent but I wonder what she would be doing if she actually practiced??