September 2018 Music Thread

[folkmamma]

Hi all! Our lovely host Waffle is away at the moment and has asked me to start this months thread.

Here is a place for us to share stories, ask for advice, and generally support one another through our DCs (and in some cases our own!) musical journeys. All are very welcome, from the early beginners to the very advanced. Some people have been regular contributors for years, but we also have a lot of newcomers and love welcoming new contributors to the MN Music Thread team. I became aware of this group about 9 months ago via the NCO 2018 thread and I now spend more time here than on Facebook... .

Over here, I have Noo, just turned 11, violinist, violist and pianist. She is playing at aroud G7 standard on violin (first study) and is starting JD this month, eek!. Noo is also an associate member of NCO and this year joined the Pro Corda ensemble training programme, which she loves above all else! She is also very into musical theatre and regularly performs in professional and semi-professional shows - it is a challenge to juggle it all, but somehow we do. This month is a biggie for Noo as she starts secondary school as well as JD.

DD2 is Moll. 8yrs old and plays cello and piano. She is a very different kettle of fish to big sister - every bit as able, but some self esteem issues, together with a slightly quirky personality, mean her journey is not often quite so smooth (and mine completely turbulent!). Working towards G3 cello this term (although she doesn’t know it yet) and will go for a consultation at Noo’s JD sometime this term also.

I’m sure Waffle will drop in to update us on Goo, Rara and her own musical self once she gets back from holibobs.

Good luck to everyone with back to school, changes in school, new routines and audition prep! I predict September will be a busy month on the thread!

Over to you....

waffle - I have. No answer... I know the head of music pretty well and she is always pleasant to me. I don't know what's going on tbh. We had a good chat at the parents' evening and I was promised that there would be changes, but nothing...

Also - I should have said, but I was mid-rant at the time. Very sorry to hear about Goo's ongoing confidence issues. I do hope that being selected for the school extension programme might play through to helping her rebuild her confidence with music.

I am a relative newcomer to this thread - joined last year under a different name but have really appreciated all the advice and love hearing about what all your DCs are up to.

My children were quite late starters and are nowhere near as advanced as most of the DCs are on this thread.

DD started learning the cello in January this year. She joined our borough training orchestra at the end of last term and has just started playing with a Saturday morning orchestra. The other cellists at the training orchestra have been playing for longer and some of the cellists in the Sat morning ensemble are very advanced (they have NCO stickers on their cases). So, it's great for her to be able to learn from more advanced players whilst she is gaining experiencing in ensemble playing.

She is joining the school 'band' next week which seems to be a bit of an eclectic mix of instruments which don't really fit any traditional ensemble set-up that I'm aware of! I hope it will be fun and a way of meeting new people.

We are looking at theory exams for this term, piano and possibly recorder too (once I have worked out waffle's trick with the washing up bowl! ).

Am hoping to sign up DS to the Sat morning orchestra too at some point. But there is only one other viola player (who is very advanced) and DS only started lessons in April so I think he would feel a bit exposed sitting next to the viola prodigy!

I've just gone back over that thread, I remember reading it at the time but didn't pluck up the courage to post until later. Where have the years gone? I particularly remember chuckling over the stealth practice.

DD has just done first audition for NYO so we are waiting to see if she has got to the next stage. It's very tough so not getting hopes up.

Lovely to hear news from everyone as they settle into the new school year.

Ah the thread moved so fast, I am behind

I love this thread Waffle, it is the only place I can learn and get advice from all you experienced mn. I didn't know anything about JD's, pro corda, NCO before reading all of your posts. So big thank you.

We have had a weird few days. Dd's teacher had a serious accident and won't be able to teach for a good few months, could be longer than 6 months could be less. I have no idea what that will mean for lessons and DD is distraught as she really cares for her teacher. I feel stuck and don't know how long is ok for DD to not have lessons. DD is emotional and very loyal. I honestly don't know what to do. DD always has lessons, even during holidays, so...I just don't know what to do. NCO audition seems like a crazy thing to do now, as she will have no instruction to prepare her

waffle your post could have been my DD a couple of years ago when she was 10/11. She went through about a year of refusing to practise or join any ensembles etc. and even used to throw her flute ( onto a wooden floor) ... It was all to do with a very unpleasant experience at primary school with an odd teacher who used to humiliate her for going out of lessons for her piano lesson at school and I think some teasing/competitive behaviour from her peers as well. Once she was happier at a different school she got back into her music and now says she is so glad she didn’t give up. (The old flute never recovered but that’s another story!!) .. so I guess what I’m saying is , it may well not be the music at all that is the problem but something else, girls are so complicated! Hope things improve for you all soon 💐

She's nearly 13... what a lovely age! I'm glad your DD sorted it all out in the end. She's falling behind a lot of her NCO friends now, because she doesn't have any incentive to work (or anyone to push her along at school) but if she practised and got into some good ensembles, she might then want to work harder! Bit of a vicious cycle going on.

@Wafflenose , might sound a bit crazy, but what about writing Goo a letter? Pour out your heart about all of this. She may screw it up and chuck it in the bin, but my betting is it will be pulled out, uncrumpled and read many times over. Even if it doesn't cause action right away, she will always have it to chew over and at some point she will at least come to appreciate your viewpoint.

Ooh, I might.

My DD is also13 now, it’s a challenge!! The note idea might work...

owlm how awful for you all.

You have a lot to sort out, and some of it very difficult. But the NCO office staff are really nice and understanding. I would ring NCO and put back the audition as far as possible, or see if they will accept a video audition. The circumstances are exceptional, so they will want to help. Then leave the teacher issue for a week or two. It is too much for your DD at the moment. Just reassure her that she will get her teacher back eventually, and that you will sort something temporary out in the next few weeks.

Things will become clearer once everyone moves beyond the initial shock. Perhaps the teacher has a senior pupil who can coach the little ones for a few weeks, at least through immediate exams and auditions? Or the teacher may have a colleague who can look after his/her pupils for a few months. Everyone will be trying to help the teacher (as well as the pupils).

I love folk’s idea of a letter. I may suggest it to a friend who is having different (but similar issues) with her DC.

It's something I've often thought about doing when things are tough with Moll, but as she is so young, to put the letters away until she is old enough to understand them. I reckon Goo is old enough and mature enough to appreciate it.

@owlm - how awful for you all. Great advice from @TaggieOHara xx

Waffle this thread is amazing and like others have said without it I would be totally lost at times so thank you
I really hope Goo finds her live of playing again at some point 13 is a tough age , and it's hard to motivate yourself to play at school when the standard isn't that high ( I have a feeling that this might increasingly become an issue for Ds too who is now one of the more advanced musicians in school with 5 more years to go ) sometimes it gets a bit boring I think and he chooses to play football instead ( at least he isn't on a scholarship so there's no pressure )
Owlm how awful for the teacher . Sound advice from others about the audition. If it makes you feel any better Ds may well be doing his without much teacher input fingers crossed it works out ( and my and Ds's relationship survives !!)

Not live of playing - love

Sometimes this decoding task due to mistyping/auto-correction tests my understanding in English. I thought you meant LIFE of playing, Trumpet. Of course, it's LOVE...

DS did the NCO audition without teacher last year. So no high expectation for him to get in. But he managed to get in. He played two of his old (and rather simple) pieces. I think the safer tactic worked.

So my advice would be to play something you can already play comfortably and develop from there to add more depth for the audition.

folk, I am amazed with your energy, passion and wisdom. You constantly try different tactics as needed. I don't know why you are not in education (or are you?). You may think of it as your later career!

Oh and, I kind of start getting what herts was saying before. DS went on total radio silence as soon as I dropped him off at school for this week. Then I just got a text because he needed me to buy him something...

I think we are all in education, us parents 😘
I have a very challenging youngest daughter who forces me to be inventive with tactics! None of them work for very long (if at all...)!!!

But really you are doing wonderfully, folk. I peeped a bit of Noo's playing on the shared channel. I like how she is developing. Her technique is getting firmer and stronger. I am sure it's because she is such a bright girl with right attitude but I think its' also your guiding skills including choosing right teachers/paths/challenges for her.

Thanks so much for the advice everyone. We went through her pieces for NCO today, and they are in good shape as she does know them. I think I had a panic (very teacher dependent), but it really isn't that important in the grand scheme of things. There is always next year.

I think we will take things slowly and you are very right Taggie things will become clearer in time. DD was so upset yesterday, I just wanted to fix her feelings for her...I know it doesn't work that way

Patrick hope you are coping well this week, with DS returning to school. It will become your new normal soon

folk DC's job is definitely to keep us on our toes. I take comfort that one day DD will hopefully be a Momma and I will stand on the sidelines and smile

My name was very similar on the old threads, easy to spot! Romany Theas still posts occasionally under a different name. I think a few of us changed names when there were all those cyber issues.

I feels slightly sad actually, it seems hardly any time ago but I now have two at uni and one growing up fast.

We also have school problems. When the older DC went through there was lots of ensembles and lots of Grade 8 + musicians. The number of ensembles has decreased, as has the standard. DS2 is now 1 of 3 brass players available for ensembles. Several options being explored for sixth form next year. Possibly even just changing to his catchment school!

Lotsofmilk will look out for you on Sunday, DS2 is a trombone player.

I wish I had some sage words of advice for those with challenging teenagers. DD stopped wanting to do solos at about 13, but she has with encouragement kept on playing and has now taken her sax to uni.

A couple of things leap out from the old thread...

a) It looks like a single thread lasted 3 years....

and

b) When it started, DS was a footballer, not a musician, and now he's planning to make music his post-18 choice. The start of that thread pretty much coincided with DS being dropped by the professional football club, and me finding a jazz course to fill his now-empty summer. He joined the very very lowest county jazz group the autumn the thread started... and i think his first exam occurred somewhere in the middle of the thread's years, though I definitely wasn't posting on music threads then!

cant, my DS was once quite a serious footballer before he got bitten by a music bug. It's so interesting how children can change so much in a totally unexpected direction, isn't it?

DS played for the local professional club's Academy for 3 years as a goalie. At least music takes place in heated rooms ...