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Poolside chat: Calling all parents of competitive swimmers!

999 replies

Marypoppins19 · 06/04/2018 08:13

I thought it might be helpful to share our highs/lows/questions/thoughts in one place. Who’s joining me!?

OP posts:
estherfrewen · 13/11/2019 15:10

Ours set their own objectives in coach meetings every so often... I don't think achieving or not achieving them is ever checked!

sanam2019 · 15/11/2019 12:33

joining this thread excitedly as DD has recently started competitive swimming, still some training required before her first galas but it should all happen in the new year. May I pick your brains, oh wise parents of older swimmers? DD is showing promise but she was born late December - due date was Jan but she was born early. Does that mean she has no chance in age group competitions? Or are there many competitions that look at age on the day rather than age by Dec 31st? At what age does this effect even out? I just hope she doesn't get discouraged if she always has to compete against those who are 6-12 months older than her. Thanks! And good luck to all!

estherfrewen · 15/11/2019 12:53

Hi and welcome! Most competitions are age on day. County and regional competitions are age at end of year and some higher level galas. To be honest height and strength are more of a game changer than age. Most of our best swimmers in the club are September birthday onwards. Our best girl - British qualifier - is a december birthday. Most other sports are age at end of season or school year and triathlon is two year bands so swimming no different really. When we first started county and regionals were age on day and depending on the date some kids with say June birthdays got to swim consecutive years in same age category which wasn’t ideal.

Eccle80 · 15/11/2019 13:15

Hello sanam! I’m still not that experienced as a swimming parent, but in a similar situation with a (just) 11 year old with an autumn birthday. It does frustrate him at the moment as his closest swimming friends in the same school year have birthdays in a different calendar year, so he has to get faster times than them for counties, and he gets annoyed that he would have a couple of times if he was a few weeks younger, but isn’t quite there for the ones he needs. I am still hoping he will get there in at least one event though, and it has been a motivator to him to really work hard in training

But as Esther says, there is always a cut off somewhere, and in the long term it will even out. And open meets are age on day, so before his birthday he had a few meets he was able to get medals in (I know times do matter more, but he does like medals!!)

estherfrewen · 15/11/2019 13:51

Hi @Eccles80 that’s a really good point about times. I think it is very important to focus on improving own pbs rather than focusing on winning or not winning. A child can’t alter their age or size or who they swim against. What they can affect is their own training, attitude, application, effort. Swimming is brilliant for character. They won’t always win and sometimes they will give it their all and have a bad day but they dust themselves off and get up at 4.30 the following day and crack on. My DS did really well when younger but he is very small and for a swimmer he is tiny and now scrapes regionals rather than medalling, qualifies for finals at counties rather than medalling. He still keeps swimming though and just concentrates on his improvement. It makes me proud that at 15 he can do that just as much as his medals did when he was younger.

Eccle80 · 15/11/2019 14:19

@estherfrewen he has done really well to keep his focus on his own improvements and not worry about others, it must be hard when things change as they get older. I am definitely trying to get mine to realise that whether he manages a county time or not this year, he has made massive improvements in his technique and times since last year and he should be proud of himself for that

Madcats · 15/11/2019 16:47

Welcome sanam!

The age thing is a can of worms. DD(12) is a June baby and I've often had to point out to her that many of her friend are 9 or 10 months older than her. The sportiest kids were nearly always the winter-borns for much of Junior School.

For girls, I think onset of puberty (late v early) is a bigger differentiator - things seem to start levelling out at about 13/14.

As others said, don't focus on the winning (though a stash of medals is nice). Instead, try to improve each time. The key thing is not to obsess when a race goes badly. Dust yourself off and try not to make the same mistakes again (that advice is just as relevant to parents too - sometimes it is hard not to be a backseat driver).

itsgettingweird · 19/11/2019 19:21

How's everyone's swimming going?

Anyone else find they are signing up to plentiful open meets in the new year to hit the counties and onwards season and silently cursing at the fact bills will arrive before Xmas and new year means the annual membership fee.

Eccle80 · 19/11/2019 19:54

My 11 year old missed getting his first county time at the weekend by less than a quarter of a second! So he is feeling frustrated despite it being a PB. He is swimming it again this weekend so I am desperately hoping he can do it but I worry the pressure will get to him. I am trying to encourage him to look at the positives of how he has improved his times recently, but I know it is hard

For us all the open meets have been during this term and after Christmas is quiet (and cheaper!)

Madcats · 19/11/2019 22:13

We have to get our County times by 31 December so Christmas hols/early Jan is quiet for us. It is a weird racing year

Keeping my fingers crossed for mini Eccle80. If it makes you feel any better, DD missed out on a county time by 0.03 second (manual timing) last Christmas and then swam that distance in the May Regionals after an Easter open meet.

Sometimes it is good to not do as well as you would have hoped, as long as the target was achievable. DD has to be in the right mindset to fight in a race.

We keep hearing horror stories of half-empty schools, so I am seriously thinking of booking an appointment at Boots to get us all a flu jab before we get too busy.

estherfrewen · 20/11/2019 07:22

Yes good luck to miniEccles for the weekend!

We have meets before and after Xmas hopefully - depending on injury. May do one or two county swims depending on gcse revision. Won’t swim regionals at all as they are bang in the middle of exams. Then hopefully back to full training post GCSEs and home nations if poss. Weird year this year after swimming so much for nine years. Roll on June!

Eccle80 · 20/11/2019 11:18

Thank you both, he has consistently improved his times over the last couple of months every time he has swum it, but it would be typical if this is the point it plateaus!

Madcats that must have been gutting for your DD, especially on manual timing when you know there is a margin of error. Amazing to then get to regionals a few months later.

Estherfrewen hope the injury improves enough that he can make some meets. It must be really hard trying to juggle exams and studying around swimming

ealingwestmum · 20/11/2019 12:07

Aw eccles, he'll get there - best of luck for the coming weekend!

Club champs last weekend for us. 8 events over 1 day, ouch. Very few PBs across the seniors, reflecting where they are in the training cycle etc, but so lovely to see the younger swimmers from age 8 making PB inroads, they are SO cute!

We're also in injury territory again. If it's not knees, it's back to shoulders. I do despair as to how long she can persevere with the knocks, and can only throw so much physio, tissue massages etc at the problems. We get post session evening tears about how much pain she's in, but then a big bowl of pasta soothes the offload...until the next day. And repeat.

Ditto roll on June! (end of please :))

ealingwestmum · 20/11/2019 12:13

I should have added, I think a lot of DD's strain issues lies with volume of stuff she does, that includes several musical instruments. These conflict and compound the impact on swimming. And lack of good pre/post stretching. I know, all common sense and absolutely necessary, but I have a head strong 16 year old that runs around like a white rabbit...

itsgettingweird · 20/11/2019 17:07

Yeah county times are due by end of year. But ds won't get those.

So he seems to be signed up for all the other open meets that go on whilst county swimmers rest and then there's a lull until end of season between regionals and nationals!

He's currently part of county team for free and IM relays. But it won't be confirmed until we enter and he needs to improve his time or not let anyone be quicker than him!

itsgettingweird · 23/11/2019 17:50

Anyone watching the ISL? I have read all the pros and cons of this but watching it's seems to be showcasing some unknown names who are smashing it!

Madcats · 24/11/2019 15:06

I keep seeing tweets about ISL. Is Eurosport the only way to see it? We just have Freesat and Amazon Prime video.

Aside from an early swim yesterday we have had a delightfully empty fixture-free weekend.

estherfrewen · 24/11/2019 15:28

I’ve seen a bit. Very jazzy! We had two consecutive 5am swims this weekend. Nearly killed me... far too old for this.

Eccle80 · 24/11/2019 17:46

We’ve just been watching a bit of the ISL on swimming. It at least seems to be getting swimming some media coverage which it rarely does!

DS was slower today than last week and was a second off the county time. He cried. He has got another shot, but I have a feeling the pressure will get to him again. As much as I can tell him to just relax and focus on technique not time, I know that is easier said than done

estherfrewen · 24/11/2019 18:46

Oh bless, no words of advice really but I do feel for him. I bet once he achieves the time probably the occasion after that when he swims it he will pb by miles as he won’t feel stressed about it.

itsgettingweird · 24/11/2019 22:18

It's on bbc sports. Can access through now tv or google it and you can get it on catch up through search page.

It's great. Is just like a league gala our kids do. They have a team and swim a lot of races back to back!

Eccle80 · 25/11/2019 11:10

Thanks estherfrewen, I suspect he will too, and in a few other events where he isn’t far off as well. I was proud of him yesterday as he had very little time after that to pull himself together for his 2nd ever 100 fly, where he got a great pb, putting him close to a county time in that too.

His club are doing a county time trial for those who are close, I am hoping that swimming in his home pool might just give him that tiny bit more he needs

estherfrewen · 25/11/2019 11:28

That’s a good idea for the club to do. Good luck!

winesolveseverything · 25/11/2019 13:57

Oh Eccle, hugs to your son.

I've got a depressed little 9 year old after a weekend of club champs, he did 8 events and did so well but in his eyes he was rubbish as he didn't get a medal 🙁

He knocked some serious seconds off his PBs though and in some cases was so close. Feel for him as he worked so hard. I think it's so easy for them to lose sight of how good they are individually sometimes when they are surrounded by amazing swimmers all the time.

Anyway, have jollied him along, nothing more for us now for a bit, so it's back to training we go..

Hope everyone else is getting on ok.. Smile

ealingwestmum · 25/11/2019 16:24

Flowers for eccles and wine's DC. There will be better weekends ahead, for sure. Hang in there...