Give me some perspective re music lessons

[BedsitBob]

so the situation is this -

(primary age) DS has lessons at his school - provided by a teacher who is based at the local secondary school which is a short drive away.

DS started working towards his Grade 1 in June 2013, he made good progress towards his first 2 pieces prior to the summer holiday. After the summer holiday he was put in a group with 2 other children (we paid for 20 minutes group lessons but they had previously only been 1 other child). Due the teacher's over busy schedule (she didn't have enough time to get from secondary to primary school) she was routinely 5 and sometimes 10 minutes late for the lessons which meant that frequently all he did was play through his pieces and get a brief comment. We got to November and he was still working on the same 2 pieces and getting demoralised. I suggested he started to work on a third piece, which he did.

Fast forward to the new year - the lessons were getting no better, DS was getting bored again so I encouraged him to work on his scales and exercises. We rang the secondary school (no way to direct contact teacher) to complain about lesson timings and him making no progress. Things improved for a while but were still not great. We made the decision to move him to individual lessons on the basis he would get more teaching time. His teacher was 5 minutes late for the first lesson, cancelled the 2nd due to illness and then was so late (>10 minutes) for the third that DS gave up waiting. we rang and complained again and was told that the teacher was teaching a class prior to DS's which was making her late, but the class was no longer on, so she would be in time in future (she was). We also asked about his Grade 1, she said there had been administrative issues which prevented him being entered in the summer(!). He is now entered for October 2014, 18 months after he started working towards it.

DS was re-enthused by individual lessons (phew) and now just wants to get his Grade 1 done after all his work.

In retrospect I think we were naive not to chase more, but we are not musical, did not understand what was involved in music exam prep and trusted his teacher to be doing the right thing.

We have now been sent through a timetable for this term and DS has again been placed in a group with 2 other children. Well, actually it's one other child, as the other child has actually left the school (yes, great admin). DS's face fell when he saw this list and he really doesn't want to go back to the awful situation he had last year. I'm also not happy about him being a group when I want him to be able to focus on exam preparation. (though the child he is with is also taking Grade 1 in October).

I want him to be moved back to an individual lesson, but apparently this is now not possible due to timetabling constraints. There was no discussion about this and we wouldn't have agreed to it, but we are now over a barrel as DS has a music exam in 5 weeks - we can't possibly find another teacher so quickly, don't know how we'd get him to lessons out of school as we both work full time and it wouldn't be ideal for him to have a new teacher at this stage anyway. Plus we are now liable for a term's music fees anyway.

I want to shout and scream and stamp my feet because I am so frustrated. But I just don't know what to do. If his group lessons are like the ones he had last year, he can seriously see him being in a position where he actually fails his exam (when he had a mock exam in June, his teacher said she would have given him a merit).

Please give me some perspective .... Is there anything I can do? Am I overreacting?

This is appalling

Do what you can to get through the exam then find new tuition

Sounds crap, but...

It's grade 1. If he gets from beginning to end of each piece and has a bash at every scale, he'll be fine.

Which instrument, by the way?

Find him a private teacher rather than doing it through school.

My DTD1 has private lessons on piano and has made an enormous amount of progress compared to her twin who has been having group lessons on flute at school for the same amount of time. If it continues, I'll be looking for a new teacher for DTD2.

It's keyboard.

I agree EvilTwins I think we will go down that route but we can't do it straight away. Though our problem is not with the teaching per se but the scheduling and administration. His teacher was very good when he he had individual lessons and even (within the constraints of having to manage 3 children) in his group lessons when he actually got a whole 20 minutes. I have been assured that they have built in travelling time to the schedule this year. His scheduled lesson is the first of the day, and I am planning to make a nuisance of myself by sitting in school (on the pretence of setting his keyboard up if need be) and checking it actually starts on time before I go to work. If he has to have a group lesson, he is at least going to have a proper length group lesson.

DD also has lessons at school (different instrument) and has had no problems at all.

Try to finish grade 1 with current teacher but do not delay looking for another teacher, new teacher most likely will be ok if you explain that you want to finish the exam with the previous teacher, he/she may even help with preparation. Can you do lessons during weekend? A lot of them teach on Saturday and Sunday.
Dd had teacher like that-always cancelled lessons, was never prepared to do extra 10-15 mins (paid), even though dd was last on that day-we left her after two months.
I would not worry too much about failing exam-if it comes to the worse he does not need to re sit it-just do next one, and if it is just pass he will still have his grade! Plus you will know that it is not him but rather bad luck. I must admit when I think about all the teachers I came across during music lessons (prospective or actual we had) I get very annoyed-the attitude of some is appalling!

how much are you paying for these lessons - as a guide we pay £10 for an individual 20 minute lesson in school - private lessons may insist on a half hour lesson which will be in the region £15. If you can afford it time and money wise I would definitely move to after school lessons. I had group lessons at school in the days when it was all free and it was not great as it is hard to keep two or even three kids going at the same pace so we ended up playing a lot of duets - good for sight reading but not great for developing technique.

GADSW - that's part of the problem. We are paying £9 for a 20 minute individual lesson which we know is really cheap compared to what private would be, so were prepared to put up with the odd thing not being right - there has just been too many things not right now!! The other problem is that I don't now how motivated DS is to carry on, it is a struggle to get him to practise these days, and I really don't know if that's because he's so bored of playing the same stuff over and over (which I would certainly be) or he is not interested in playing any more - so we are slightly reluctant to pay more money for private lessons. I had a look and we would be paying £15-£20 which is a jump - fine if he is keen, but not so much if he has lost interest.

I am looking at weekend lessons but of course they are popular so quite booked up ...

Thank you to whoever said as long as he gets through his pieces and scales he should be ok!! He can certainly do that, so at least he should get something ...

Get a new teacher.

I stuck with a music teacher for DD2 for far too long, because I assumed that the teacher knew better than I did. A lot of her other pupils were doing very well, and I assumed the fault lay with my DD.

I have come to realise that, actually, while she is a very good teacher, her teaching style did not suit my DD, and she was very inflexible.

DD has had a new teacher for nearly two years, now, and is flying.

New teacher, half hour individual lessons. Schools are in a difficult position now as so few can afford to offer any subsidisation (government grants stopped in 2009/2010 I think). Therefore fewer parents can afford lessons and tutors find they are not able to make a living doing this any more. Many primary schools stopped offering lessons as a result.

It does cost more money to have individual private 30 minute lessons, but it will be worth it.

BedsitBob, my dd has an excellent teacher for one of her instruments, and she costs a fortune! But guess what? Dd makes rapid progress and had excellent result for her exams so far in spite of being very young. She was not so lucky with her second instrument and it is all reflected in price, exam marks....though I may be unfair and it is just more difficult instrument...

SanityClause, "actually, while she is a very good teacher, her teaching style did not suit my DD", this is it! I firmly believe now that there is a right teacher for every student but it takes sooo much time (and money) to find one. Dd used to go to one of the teachers which was lovely and sweet, but it just did not work for dd. Her best teacher is very strict, too strict sometimes... but it works!

I think I'd have lost motivation too if I'd been doing the same thing for 18 months. When you're working out what to do take the exam out of the equation, after this length of time he's as good as he's going to get. From what you've said he won't fail and even if he did you could draw a line under it and move on to G2 (or G3 or whatever). You can test his enthusiasm by buying him some more music, something new and fresh might be what he needs to engage him.

You've paid for the term which will take you through the exam and give you time to see whether things are working out. It's possible that it will all work well and not be a repeat of last year. Long term - well it depends on what options you have and how much longer he has in primary. It does make life easier having lessons at school, you don't have the travelling and it doesn't cut into your free time but if it's not working out for you then I would be looking for another teacher and going on their waiting list if necessary.

We started with group lessons, it worked really well to start with because the other child was a bit older and my son was determined to play everything he could play, the competition really dragged him along. I don't think it works at all once they progress because they simply don't get enough time in the lesson to work on technique.

As a non-musical parent I'd say that G1 is the hardest for us because if you've not done it yourself you have no idea what to expect.

£9 for 20 minutes sounds cheap - but it depends what's being achieved in that 20 minutes! It sounds as if you are paying a relatively small amount of money for an extremely small amount of music tuition, which is definitely not value for money. I would finish the term, and look elsewhere. It's not surprising that your son isn't motivated in the circumstances.

TBH a 20 minute group lesson isn't really suitable for learning an instrument, it's fine for initiation and working out whether the child has any real interest, but beyond the beginning stages I think that anything less than 30 minutes is really a bit short especially for piano/keyboard (some instruments lend themselves better to group lessons than others).

Ours have done a lot of music and 3 won music scholarships and 5 children doing music in schools. However private schools. Their teachers have just about always turned up and lessons are private 1 to 2 and either 30 minutes or now they are older I think it's 40. It is about £200 a term.

Why not just get an out of school music teacher if you can afford it? Also insist they enter him for his grade 1.
Also make sure every day just for 15 minutes or 10 mins you sit and listen to the pieces.

You've got to find a decent teacher out of school. This is worse than rubbish!

My DD had one music teacher who was "nice" but pretty ineffective. Organised through school, 1:1 lesson.

Changed teacher, as there is more than one wind teacher that comes into school, and her progress in six months was astonishing. And that's with a shared lesson. She's twice changed partners as she is progressing so well.

Teacher makes a massive difference IME.

I don't think 9 per 20 minute sounds cheap if it's a group lesson.

I pay 11.50 per 20 minute for individual lessons. If it was group I wouldn't expect the price to be significantly above 11.50 divided by the number of people, so say 4-4.50 if you had 3 people.

What a nightmare! I worked as a peripatetic teacher and if I was late to a school each lesson would have to be pushed back. I would never just cut a lesson short! As others have said, I'd grin and bear it to get through grade 1, and then get a private teacher for 30mins individual on the weekend if you can squeeze it in.

Well done for keeping going so far, I'm shocked by the admin messes. Good luck.

Price is irrelevant if teaching isn't happening. Contrast with my first peri violin teacher who used to give me an extra half hour! forsaking her own lunch break...

I don't think £9 for twenty minutes of rubbish teaching is cheap at all! We pay £15 for thirty minutes private lesson after school with a disciplined, demanding but enthusiastic teacher. You can do better, OP.

Our best teacher is 44/hour...

But she delivers....
The rest we had started from 15/30 mins

I agree with Julie price is irrelevant if no teaching is taking place.
We had the same problem with vocal lessons and decided to go private which doesn't cost any more at all.
personally, I don't hold with group lessons in 20 mins and can't see what can be taught.
I would look around for some private lessons OP where your ds will get the individual attention he requires.
I would also skip grade one and move onto grade 2 when a new teacher has consolidated the gr1 material.

Forget about the exam. Exams don't matter.

Forget about the fact that he's losing interest and practising less. That's obviously due to the fact that the lessons are crap. Interest and motivation doesn't exist in a vacuum; it develops in response to a positive learning environment.

I've been in charge of a number of peripatetic music services in schools, and sadly they're often as rubbish as this. Nothing you have written surprises me. It really takes an exceptionally committed and sorted kind of teacher to overcome the weaknesses built into the system. I've had the pleasure of working with a few of those, and it sounds like your daughter might have one.

Get him lessons outside of school, no question. Even apart from the problems you describe, it just works better. You get better liason with the teacher and can support the lessons better from home. The teacher is more directly responsible to you as you see them to talk about it regularly.

What's the use of saving a bit of money if it gets you a crap service that doesn't provide what you need and ends up destroying a child's perfectly natural and healthy motivation? C'mon, children and education are too important for that.

Fast

I could kiss you.

We have a really good music service and the teachers go the extra mile, but they can only do what they can with a system that is coping with never ending cuts.
If you have a child with talent and ambition you have to go to a private teacher.
A good one won't rip you off and you will find that many of the same teachers from private schools teach their own private pupils for far less than the schools charge.
OP, try the abrsm website, it has parents and teachers who will happily pass on their experience and advise.