Give up one instrument?

[Rabbitcar]

I hope you can help me with a music related question. DD1 learns the piano and flute, and I'd quite like her to give one of them up, as I think two instruments is too much hard work. She is academic, but is also in lots of sports teams, drama clubs, singing ensembles etc. and has a busy social life. I just think it's too much. She is in Y8 and by the end of the academic year will have done her Grade 6 flute and Grade 6 piano. She does well enough in the exams with a mixture of merits and distinctions but is not especially talented/a musical genius by any means. It's more that she's lucky enough to do ok at most things with some effort.

I think she should give up one, as the pressure will only get more as she progresses through the school. She seems to feel that she should keep going, even though she doesn't enjoy the flute at the moment - no idea why she feels this as she gets no pressure from us, maybe it's because her friends at her school also do music at a high level. She wants to do music gcse but not at any further level.

Also, which should she give up? She would say the flute, as she much prefers the piano (mainly because of a nicer teacher) but I think the flute is better as she can then play in orchestras etc at school. The piano is less sociable. The counter argument is that she will do better at the instrument she likes best. Of course it is ultimately her choice and I would never dictate to her which instrument to play, but I would be interested in your views.

I don't want to force her into stopping, but she might find it easier if I made the decision for her and she could blame it on me! She does get very tired, and I think maybe I should 'save' her from herself.

I just want her to be able to relax and enjoy her childhood, and two instruments seems too much. I know lots of other children do two or more however, but she is not particularly robust. DD2 does two and seems to cope better.

Thanks a lot

Thanks Summer, good suggestions. It's tricky as children nowadays seem to do so much out of school (for university entrance?) that it's hard to make the decision to veg and enjoy their childhood. I do think that a large helping of doing nothing is a good idea though. In y10/11, the pressure will ramp up, and I don't want her getting super stressed, as I think she, in common with other able children, certainly has tendencies that way. Many thanks

Its difficult to say really regarding time.

It certainly wouldn't be unusual in DCs school to be grade 6 in Y8 and do Grade 8 in Y10

DD has just done Grade 6 sax this year (Y9), but she did Grade 5 in Y7, having got there in 2.5 years from starting. Then she hit a brick wall, partly lack of confidence. (They only do exam entries once a year in DCs school so if you miss it yo have to wait a year). But apparently her teacher is talking about Grade 8, next year in Y10. I do trust him as regards it being feasible, he has nearly 50 years teaching experience!

DS1 would have done Grade 8 this year, but didn't because of GCSEs. But he changed from trumpet after Grade 5 in Y8 to trombone and tuba and has done exams in year 8 and 9 on those.

Something else to think about, playing your orchestra instrument in an orchestra/group helps immensely with total practice time while doing an activity they enjoy. Piano needs more actual 'practice'. DS discovered this the hard way with piano last year. But then he loves playing in groups and plays in several both in and out of school, and if your DD has got to Grade 6 then she obviously does her piano practice better than DS1.

Don't look at what your DD can do compared with what others do. Mine play 3 or 4 instruments but don't do the range of activities any more that your DD does. DD (Y9) goes to the gym for DofE, Explorer Scouts and her music. This time last year she had ballet and rowing in the mix. Things change.

Rabbitcar I've just worked it out (it needed fingers) and it took mine two and a half years to move from G6 to G8, he took G6 in the July of Y6 and G8 in December of Y9 (he missed out G7 as his peri teacher was absent for a long while that year)

Thanks both, that timing is very useful to know. G6 in Y6 sounds very good Ishould! Raspberry, that sounds like a wide range of activities to me, very impressive! Thanks a lot.