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Extra-curricular activities

Find advice on the best extra curricular activities in secondary schools and primary schools here.

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Original poster

No parents allowed in Ballet class, is this standard?

43 replies

minkersmum · 11/03/2014 21:17

Dd2 is 5 and fancied trying ballet. She has a bit of seperation anxiety and for most things prefer me to stay until she feels confident with the new person. Even now she is at school if there is a new person coming to school she gets incredibly anxious, asking questions as soon as she opens her eyes on that day of school, upset nervous tummy etc. Once she knows and trusts the person she is absolutely fine. Anyway she fancied trying ballet. There is a class in town that her class mates go to and so i have taken her along. First week she was fine and I was allowed to sit on the chairs in the hall while they had their class. Then there was a two week holiday so last week still felt quite new and I planned to sit and watch again but was told this isn't allowed. Teacher eventually allowed it but said after this I must leave her and wait outside.

It's a class full of 4/5/6 years olds. Is this pretty standard? I quite like that it is quite strict, lots of fuss about sitting up straight cross legged and eyes on the teacher etc but at the same time I'm not sure I like the 'no parents' rule! Another parent had relatives from New Zealand staying and asked if they could watch for a bit and was told no too!!

I'm thinking you are all going to say this is the norm but I wanted to ask!

OP posts:

hippo123 · 20/03/2014 21:57

Normal for my dd's baby ballet class here which take them from 12 months! Most are 2/3 years though. No windows either, and door is kept firmly shut. You always get a few anxious mum laying on the floor trying to peep though the crack on at the bottom of the door for the first few weeks!

AlpacaLypse · 20/03/2014 22:02

Yes it's the norm.

But looking back, ballet was the single biggest waste of time and money of the pre-school years.

Scholes34 · 21/03/2014 14:12

Horses for courses - DD loved it and is still doing it twelve years later. She's not aiming to take it up as a career, but it's been great for posture and general fitness . . . and UCAS points.

Flibbertyjibbet · 21/03/2014 14:20

Parents are allowed to sit in, in my sons gymnastic classes. I go and sit in the café.

When I have on occasion sat in and watched, the children are always checking to see whether a parent is watching, running over to mum or dad for drinks etc, older siblings playing on ipads etc with distracting game noises, younger siblings trying to get on the mats etc etc.

I have no idea why the teachers allow it, much better for them to just have the teacher and equipment to concentrate on.

Londondancelab · 16/06/2016 11:25

This is very much the norm in ballet but in my studio we have windows in the doors that allow parents to see everything. It doesn't bother me or the children in least. It also puts mums' minds at rest when they can see what is going on. I don't allow parents in the studio but watching from a distance is fine in my classes.

Sometimes the toddlers look out to the parents and does seem to give them a little more confidence when they can see their mums. When they are new there is a compulsion to run to the door which can be a disruptive. However after a few lessons, they stop doing this and are happy to concentrate on the lessons

No parents allowed in Ballet class, is this standard?

user1488750702 · 11/04/2017 13:50

Sorry, new to Mumsnet, and saw this thread. I think the teachers prefer parents out of the dance class as the child tends to focus more on whats being taught rather than mum-look-at-me?

NeverTwerkNaked · 11/04/2017 13:52

Pretty standard. My dd is 3.5 and her gym and dance are both parent-free!
In fact I prefer it to the baby groups as found the parents would talk over the teacher etc!

MiaowTheCat · 11/04/2017 14:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mooandmama · 11/04/2017 14:48

Baby ballet it was mummy stayed but at 3.5 when she went into prep it was no mummies. And was totally the best thing for her. But as others have said, she'd had 18months getting to know her friends and teachers. We are at a different school now and even the babies don't have their mummies in class. When she first moved there, I didn't even observe her trial class but she was a bit older than your daughter

hazelnutlatte · 11/04/2017 16:53

Londondance this thread is from 2014! I don't think the op will be reading your reply!

springflowers11 · 11/04/2017 17:06

I have a gymnastics club and allow parents to stay if they want to. on the plus side the children love their parents seeing what they can do, and try really hard.The downside is preschool siblings, and the noise that chattering parents make!

springflowers11 · 11/04/2017 17:07

Greenleave · 11/04/2017 17:41

Mine is starting next week, only just turns 3, very excited. I although very happy that I have 30mins free childcare completely.

orabel · 12/04/2017 22:31

We're allowed to stay as it's a fairly small studio and the seating area is behind a transparent curtain.

It's useful, I suppose, so you can see/hear how your child is doing. In another school where there's no parent viewing I have to ask immediately or my child forgets the corrections they've received. I think it also gets them used to being watched.

In gymnastics there's a one way viewing area above, so as not to distract the children. Which makes sense as it can be rather more dangerous if they're on the beam/bars etc

Another school we tried many years ago allowed parents to watch (no choice, no separate viewing or waiting area). They had trouble with noisy, chattering parents. Parents interrupting the class to talk to the teacher, or to shout out corrections or tell their child to try harder! We didn't stay there.

orabel · 12/04/2017 22:33

Great, zombie thread! The child in the OP will be 8 years old now

Groovee · 13/04/2017 07:05

It was normal from age 3 at my dd's dance school for them to be left. They had a great cafe so most parents waited there.

Crumbs1 · 13/04/2017 07:18

It might help your daughter's 'separation anxiety' (why does every behaviour need a label or diagnosis?) if she is encouraged to just get on with it if she wants to dance. Might actually be you projecting your anxieties onto her. Explain that mothers aren't allowed, that it's the rule and that you'll be outside ready when she finishes. Then go and have a coffee with the other mothers. Both of you will learn she can survive just fine.

ebarinov2305 · 07/06/2017 22:23

Is there anywhere you could wait just outside the class?
That way you'll be close enough for your daughter to feel secure or get to you if she needs you but the teacher wont have to worry about you disturbing the class etc

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