Do you discuss Brexit with friends or avoid the subject completely?

[BigSandyBalls2015]

Just curious.

We're out for dinner tonight with two other couples - I'll be the only remainer amongst the six of us …… could be an interesting night, esp with drinks flowing.

My dh, some of my family and friends voted leave whereas I voted remain. I don't discuss it. Sometimes with dh but I just end up feeling sad and depressed afterwards so I avoid it. I don't discuss it with leave family and friends. Maybe a little with remainer friends.

Avoid!!! I had my Tory Brexit sister and family for New Year and we never mentioned it once. So glad we both were able to keep our lips sealed. It would not have gone well if we'd got into it.

My best friend voted leave and we avoid the subject. We did talk about it once and her reason for voting Leave was pretty rubbish - yes, I know that's subjective but it really was. She said she hadn't given it much thought. I didn't get a vote in the referendum and Brexit has already cost me thousands. I think it's safer to avoid the subject!

My friends are pretty involved in politics and I work dealing with Brexit, so I get asked how it's going (I usually just say to read the headlines) a lot. Some are bored of it and some are seriously distressed by it so I don't discuss it around them.

Pretty much all my colleagues voted Remain if they were eligible to do so, with the only exceptions some junior staff who haven't mentioned it since 2016, and all the other people I work with just wish it would be cancelled.

My dad is a Eurosceptic but eventually voted Remain (holding his nose as he did it, he says) for economic reasons. My mum would be Leave (because of all the immigrants. Too many in rural Surrey, she says) but couldn't vote because she's an immigrant... I avoid discussing it with her but my dad enjoys threatening to get her deported when she gets extra annoying!

Dad is an economist with lots of international experience so I enjoy discussing it with him, and hope he's right that it will be OK even if leaving was a stupid idea.

Everyone I know voted leave and we discuss it a lot. Mainly we worry in case it is cancelled.

I voted remain. I talk about it a lot with friends . I don't know anyone who voted leave.

I've got friends family and colleagues who voted leave and remain. I don't understand how anyone can only know people who voted one way. We have to talk about it at work and it often crops out of work. It does sometimes gets heated but usually in a good way. This referendum seems to have got people thinking about all sorts of issues - trade related and societal.

I have to because I’m asked to explain it - I work overseas and my friends here can’t believe what the U.K. has done - quite happy to agree with them that it’s crazy!

Yes we discuss it

Not so much who voted what and why but definitely the massive balls up its become and the potential fallout

Having sadi that when the subject comes up i do preface my comments with soothing platitudes about not caring how people voted as everyone voted for good reasons

I obviously don't believe that about everyone who voted but i like my friends...mostly

I'm envious of people who live in a remain bubble.

Its discussed, but it becomes obvious when people say things like they voted leave to get out of the ECHR, or that the EU has shown how its punishing us in negotiations etc, that those people who voted leave don't have a clue about reality.

All my family and friends voted leave bar one person who voted remain. So we all hold the same view as to why leaving is the right thing.

No clue how colleagues voted. We don't discuss it.

I live in a strong leave area. Only the non-British eu citizens talk about it, others just make a quick joke and change the subject. This is also a strong tory area, and it seems mostly people are happy to leave it all in the capable hands of the government.............

Discussing Brexit with leavers reminds me of when my Aunt tried to.get me to join in and link arms to Auld Lang Syne at the end of a Cliff Richard concert. I wasn't being a party pooper, it was just shit.

{I'm envious of people who live in a remain bubble.}
I do, it's called Europe.

Easy. I've never discussed politics in detail with anyone at all, whether friends, family or clients and I'm not about to start now. No one (other than OH and DS) knows whether I voted remain or leave - they don't know whether I vote Tory or Labour. If someone tries to start a conversation about politics, I just smile, make a few vague comments and change the subject.

I always find it really uncomfortable when someone is clearly extreme in their views, regardless of which extreme, and make a mental note to try to avoid them as much as possible as I've found out that those with extreme views (left or right) are usually pretty hard to deal with - I'm the same with people who are extremely religious or extremely anti-religion.

My family and friends are all pretty much "middle of the road" and open minded, so anyone with fixed/extreme views doesn't really fit in. I'd really make an effort to avoid anyone who constantly went on about Leavers or Remainers or tried to force their EU views on me.

The two vocal leaver colleagues who a year or so a go were saying “ Why don’t they just get on with it?” have been noticeably silent on the issue for the last few months.
I’m too chicken to ask what they’re thinking. Politics and workplace don’t mix.

All my friends are remain, except one who voted leave and regrets it and now campaigns to remain. I do talk about it with them.

I can’t talk about it with my brexit voting family. I’m worried I’ll start swearing at them about them voting for it because it would “be interesting”. Im wondering if it’s been interesting enough yet because I am heartsick at the jobs this country has already lost, preparing for food and medicine shortages, the money this country has already lost from GDP which is more than we ever contributed, and the complete poverty of leadership of our government.

I've not read the full thread but among friends and colleagues I've been surprised about how little we talk about it. It seems to be a bit of a conversation killer
Quite a few of my social circle seem to think any outcome is fine, even no deal. I'm quite horrified by how little political engagement there is!

Was literally about to start a thread along these lines but with a slightly stronger focus - How do you get family to be able to discuss it calmly and rationally with you? Hope you don't mind me piggybacking, OP?

It matters, because planning and prepping etc is a bit of a team effort and because it's incredibly lonely feeling the weight of what feels like is going to happen with nobody in your immediate family onside.

In my case, I must be clear- DH is very much a Remainer. The trouble is, he's a Remainer who adamantly believes he knows more about economics than the average Joe (which he may well do. I certainly lack the understanding to challenge him) and that there is absolutely no threat to the economy beyond very short term, which anyone on a fixed mortgage etc with a reasonable income and decent food stocks need not worry about. To me, I think he's sticking his head in the sand. Any articles or reasoning I try to show him are summarily dismissed. Everything comes back to the Bank of England injecting more cash and not letting inflation rise too high etc.

I've given up trying to talk because there's just no way in. I'm made to feel crazy and stupid and he absolutely won't entertain it. Which I'm guessing is much like talking to many Leavers. How do you go about initiating conversations with family that need to be had for practical and mental wellbeing in a way that's conducive to calm, rational discussion and planning??

@NotCitrus v interested to hear that your dad is also an economist and believes it will be ok even if we leave, despite being a Remainer and thinking it's stupid...sounds v much like my husband. What is his logic? This reassures me somewhat if they are saying the same. I should trust DH's expertise but it's just so out of my depth that I find it hard.

Would also be interested in your personal take on whether it will be 'ok' from what you've gleaned within your circles. I find the trouble is a lot of people speculating who aren't close enough to it (me included) instead of listening closely to those who are...

A friend of mine voted leave and we chat about it daily, amongst other things. Over the 2 years she has realised a lot of what was sold was rubbish (EU didn't 'make' us pay immigrants welfare, there have been few signs of Turkey joining ~other that Boris pleading for it and no EU army just yet) but every now and then she will come out with "it's not democratic to have another vote!" or "Sky says EU is going down the pan, but we knew that already! At least we didn't join the Euro" etc. Happy to report that most of the time she is suitably sheepish about it though - almost as soon as she saw the demographics of the voters she was a bit shocked I think as she doesn't class herself as poor, emotional or undereducated - I do realise that is a massive generalisation

I also post about it a lot on fb - had a few leavers comment on my posts over the years and am not ashamed to comment on their Katie Hopkins posts with actual figures from ONS for example. One of my favourite leaver comments was actually on a non-brexit post where he said something along the lines of "look how many likes you get when you don't post about Brexit!", which showed me he has seen all of my brexit posts = win!

Not much. With some like minded friends we've whinged about the situation and also empathised with some as it's had a big impact already on their workplace etc. But even then it's spoken about very little as we tend to find it somewhat depressing.

With people I know voted different I would never speak about it and would actively shut down the conversation saying I don't wish to discuss the matter.

With people I'm not sure, again it would never be spoken about where possible.

For me it's more acquaintances rather than close friends who would have voted differently to me, though also some family. Hence it's never mentioned. Tbh I'd never voluntarily start a conversation about politics myself anyway - it's just not an area I particularly enjoy speaking about.

BoyMeetsWorld
I have no idea how you would broach the subject with DH and family but I would follow the advice of poster Bellinisurge on the Preppers threads and make SOME preparations yourself. Obviously down to your personal means but having 'a bit extra' in the cupboard would boost morale if/when things get a bit bumpy. If you can do this with 'family blessing' then it makes it a lot easier, otherwise you might need to be a bit more devious about it. Just doing SOMETHING will probably reduce your stress.
The problem with Brexit is that it is attacking UK citizens from many sides at once, so although your DF as an economist and DH having good knowledge of it may not be taking some of the other factors into account.
Partick Minford (advisor to ERG group) claims that the UK will do well is being dishonest in that he has deliberately discounted some of the very negative factors (to make his arguments look good obviously) so while what is says is 'true' it is not the whole story.
Brexit IS darn complicated and only the 'highlights' that make shock headlines make the news outlets.
Your DH will be correct that the BoE will do all it can to make the INTERNAL workings of the UK as near bearable as possible but dealings (trade) outside the UK will have significant effect either in significant jumps or as along slow decline. As individuals it will be difficult to really do anything except go with the flow. Stashing some nice chocolate in a mouse proof container now might be all you can really do.