Feeling bad about this

[needmorecoffee]

After being car-free for a long time despite 4 kids, one of whom is severely disabled, i feel like giving up and getting a wheelchair accessible vehicle. Like a Kangoo. I am sick of buses and trains that aren't accessible and fed up of phoning 20 taxi companies to find one that can take wheelchairs and even more fed up when they send one and its a farking normal car!
But I feel so guilty and totally like a wuss. I know cars are a huge contribution to climate chnage as well as pollution in the city and congestion and noise and I feel bad even thinking about it. In mind mind you cannot be green or ethical if you own a car
But after being stranded on Brigdwater station then heaving dd's wheelchair over the footbridge there on sunday evening in the pissing rain with lots of luggage (I have multiple sclerosis myself) and then today, going for a bus to the hospital and it turns up and isn't an accessible one cos the company has changed and having to walk 2 miles there and 2 miles back and being in agony I'm feeling very depressed.
Buck me up someone please and tell me my tiddly car free contribution is worthwhile!

Frankly (and I am a moderately militant car-free type myself) I think if anyone ought to have use of a car it's people like you, who could really do with one. IF all the able-bodied, child-free (or with adult children) urban dwellers got off their idle arses and got rid of their cars, then it would still be reasonable in my book for people with several children, mobility problems, or who live in remote areas with little or no public transport, to have cars of their own. Because they need them.

I just feel bad cos we've managed up to now and I really really hate cars. Plus, what a waste of 170 quid a month for a motability car. argh

I agree with madamez. I am an evangelical car-refusenik also - but if I were in your situation, I would buy a car.

IMO those of us who don't need cars should eschew them, and those who need them should have them - this reduces the overall carbon footprint, and means that people needn't feel guilty about using the things that are really necessary for their circumstances. Or something.

Wot madamez said.

You need a car.

I am also car free, and its hard work even with just one dd, with no SN. I have the utmost admiration for you and your determination, and yes, your contribution is worthwhile.

i think in between Madamez's anti- Mundanes rhetoric, there is a really good point.. why make your life any harder than it already is if you can do something to solve a problem? Can you get a car with lower emissions?

and i bet you do loads of other eco friendly stuff to do your bit for the environment.

If you decide to get a car then DO NOT feel guilty about it.

As others have said, the people who should feel guilty are those who are perfectly capable of walking or using public transport, but who can't be arsed.

You could look at it as getting a car whilst you need one then maybe some time in the future getting rid of it again. You've already made a big contribution by not having one.

Needmorecoffee,

Thank you.
I think your stand is inspirational, to be so devoted to the cause to go to such lengths not to get a car is completely admirable. You are a lesson to most people.

However, I also agree with everyone else, get a car, get comfortable and know that you really do need it. Have you ever considered the amount of fuel burnt by the taxis getting from wherever they are to where you are? By having your own car, waiting (and not burning fuel) outside at your beck and call, you'll be cutting down on that element of wastage.

Unlike most people who drive I'm sure that you will continue to walk or catch public transport when it is possible and not drive 100 metres to the shop just because you can.

Seriously though - I wish more people thought like this.

Cheers

M

I think OP doesn't want to be comforted that it's ok for her to get a car, I think she wants some moral support to continue as she is, maybe?!

I think how you've managed to far is admirable, needmorecoffee. I appreciate your "tiddley" contribution, certainly!

Would hiring a car on occasion as needed be an acceptable (practical) compromise solution? Just for the journeys that are likely to be most awkward. You also might want to look at carshare schemes, although you need to live in a big city usually to join up with one. Then you can sign a car out of a carpool for a few hours or a day or so as needed.

I don't feel comfortable when you said that a person can't be green or ethical if they have a car. Not because I disagree, but because I don't think we should get so attached to claiming certain labels or any perfectionism. At the end of the day, it's up to each of us as individuals to do as much as we realistically can to be environmentally responsible, whether or not that earns us a label or fits any particular strict ideals.

I'm a bit in awe of you, needsmorecoffee. Don't demean yourself!

Why are you calling 20 different firms to find an available taxi? Is there any way you can schedule in advance? Even if it is only a few hours ahead of time? No taxi firm is going to turn away business if they can help it. If they know not to send their wheelchair friendly car out on a fare that doesn't need it, both sides win.