Noisy neighbour, what can I do about it?

[chloem93]

Hi,

I live in a mother and baby hostel and my baby is approaching 4 months old. I have 5 neighbours on this floor, all of whom have moved in after me and all have older children ranging from 1 year- school age. Since late January, a neighbour has been making so much noise (she has a 2 and 4 year old) in the hallway. One morning this was happening at 6 in the morning so I politely said 'please can you be a little bit quieter as my baby is sleeping' (I wanted to sleep as well but obviously can't because of the noise). She didn't apologise. Since then it's gotten worse, her kids started banging on my door a day after and it continued sporadically up until a week ago. I would open my door and she wouldn't apologise. I did complain to the woman that I pay my utilities too, since the banging on my door has stopped but the screaming has gotten worse and the slamming of the doors at all hours which has been going on for about a month or two, I can't sleep. It happens at 2.30am, 5am, 6.30am at all hours. All of our bathrooms are in a hallway so you have to leave your room to go to the toilet, they have their own bathroom and for some reason need to go 10 times in an hour, screaming running and having tantrums along the way (this goes on until about midnight). And then after that it's just the slamming of the doors which wakes me up, I don't consider myself a light sleeper and the people doing don't seem to be trying to be quiet. When I go to the bathroom, I try to close my door quietly to be thoughtful of others but recently I've lost all respect for everyone here. I can't even use my shared bathroom as my other neighbour thinks it's ok to leave all of her kids toys in the bath.
What can I do? Do environmental health deal with noise complaints in hostels? I've been put on antidepressants because it's stressing me out so bad, I've been trying to keep a log but the noise is 24/7, I would be logging all day instead of taking care of my daughter. I go out most days to get away from it, sitting in parks for 8 hours but why should I have to?
Any advice for me please.

(and yes I know kids make noise but I'm talking about constantly screaming and she lets her kids stay up late and then they have huge tantrums, even hearing them say 'mummy you hit me', she also doesn't supervise the oldest when he goes to the toilet late at night and lets him slam doors and runs in the hallway, I feel like the noise is deliberate).

Have you posted about this before? It sounds very familiar.

Grindeux,
Yes but obviously not with the same details and things have advanced since then. I also didn't get any practical advice last time and was hoping someone had a solution other than 'just put up with it'.

Apologise I didn't spell your username correctly, I'm sleep deprived as you can imagine and self medicating to get through the night.

Maybe you should speak to the people that run the hostel?

This is very difficult when you are living in sharing accommodation. Is there some kind of support system in place where you live e.g a support worker 1-1 support in the hostel? What are your other neighbours saying about this noise? maybe speak to them and if they are also feeling same as you then you may collectively report this person. Not sure about environmental health as it is a hostel but it is worth a try they certainly will give you advice.
You may find baby community centres or child community centres in your area for you to attend I have seen some run courses for parents, single mothers they run workshops, they have baby play activities, baby massages, baby yoga, outdoor play areas you may get free crèche if you go on any courses they may run. Libraries some run baby and toddlers singing groups something for you to able to get out to past time. Have you thought about getting some ear plugs. I really hope things get better for you.

Sounds horrendous OP and I would be seriously on the edge in your situation.

You sound amazingly resilient tbh.

Who runs the hostel and decides who gets to stay and is it considered a short term place or for as long as wanted?

I would put my concerns in writing, try not to be over emotive or rude at all and simply state the facts then send it to the people in charge of the building.

But not before I’d tried again to talk calmly to the woman involved. But being honest if she hadn’t given a shit by now it’s unlikely she will do think you would need to take it higher.

Was there any form of behaviour contract when you were placed there? (Sorry don’t really understand what it is- am assuming like a refuge?)

In the meantime can you place any form of wadding or foam along the door edge so they don’t bang when left to close for example or use a white noise machine and ear plugs when you sleep.

Could you ask to transfer to a different room within the same building maybe?

Hi OP, that sounds really frustrating for both you and baby. I was going to suggest wax ear plugs but that wouldn't be helpful for baby.

Have you got any speakers? I used to stream a continuous white noise from an app quite loudly in my room when I shared a room with DS when he was under the age of one. Blocked out all other noises around the house and put me to sleep too. Could you give that a try?