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Elderly parents

Advice on writing a simple eulogy for my mother's requiem mass

29 replies

Tolkienista · 02/07/2026 22:13

My mother died two days ago on June 30th, she'd been on end of life care since the end of February & astounded everyone by how long she lived despite being bedbound, in cognitive decline and losing so much weight.
The end came very very quickly, over the course of 6 hours or so, gradually her body shut down.
She lived in a wonderful care home.

I've never written a eulogy in my life, but I've volunteered to write hers and say it at her requiem mass. I've got copies of two excellent eulogies from cousins who wrote them for their mothers & what strikes me is the simplicity of their eulogies pretty much in chronological order, which is what I want to do.

I've already started writing sub headings , so I've got ideas, but any pointers, advice or experience please share and inspire me.

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Tolkienista · 06/07/2026 06:25

mondaytosunday · 04/07/2026 22:51

I had to write my DH’s. I looked online at samples. Now ChatGPT could do it. Why not try that? You can then tweak it to sound more like your voice.

@mondaytosunday Someone earlier suggested chat gpt, so I went to the site and tried it out.
Absolutely brilliant, obviously not on it's own but a really good framework to build my own eulogy with the relevant information on her life built in.

That is the first time I've tried it out and for me it's a winner.
Would never have thought of it at all. Thanks for your message and your help.

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Tolkienista · 06/07/2026 06:27

EmpressaurusKitty · 05/07/2026 03:50

You’ve had a lot of great advice here. One of the best pieces of advice I was given was to practise reading my mum’s eulogy over and over again beforehand until it just felt like words and I knew I could get to the end.

Also that if I did need to stop for a minute, that was absolutely fine.

Ideally have a hanky or tissues in a pocket, not just in your bag, so that you don’t have to worry about remembering to take them when you go up to the front.

Great advice again and most definitely I'll have a tissue handy as I know exactly where a wobble might take place.

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Tolkienista · 06/07/2026 06:29

Caillieach · 04/07/2026 23:08

I didn't want to do a eulogy for my Dad, so instead I wrote a letter detailing what he had taught me and adding in some funny memories. It gave me some real peace as I got the chance to tell him what I felt.
Whatever you decide will be wonderful.

Oh that is lovely and a novel twist on a traditional eulogy, love that.

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DeftGoldHedgehog · 06/07/2026 06:31

I wrote my mother's sort of chronologically and also talked about what she enjoyed in life and elements of her character through anecdotes. I also tried to mention almost everyone attending the funeral or who we had also lost recently and bring them into it.

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