Where do I start looking for a carer?

[Frustrated1974]

I posted earlier about my dad (78)being sent home from hospital with carers twice a day to help with personal hygiene etc. I’m aware these are only for a maximum of 6 weeks so beginning to think about what happens when they are no longer provided. My mum (75) will not be capable to help my dad wash, get dressed etc as she’s already struggling with other aspects of his care (toileting, feeding etc) and is exhausted. Dad refuses to let any of his children get involved in hIs personal care so they are going to need private carers. Where do we start looking for them, how do we find good carers and how much should we expect to pay?

Why do you think they will need private carers ?

Presumably there has been some form of social services assessment for your DF to be receiving the current care package so he's known to them. Request an assesssment for both your DF and your DM - her's will be a carer's assessment. This carers assessment is really important as it tries to gauge the capacity of the carer to provide suitable care. It's not foolproof however. I would strongly urge either yourself or one of your sibs be there as a reality checker. My Dad spent an entire evening telling me he could no longer cope but next morning said everything was fine and didn't need any help to the social worker.

They will make their recommendations in terms of type of input and time needed - if your parents are above the financial level, they will have to pay, however they will have a list of local care agency they use / recommend.

As to how much - as I said it depends on your parents financial situation - could be nothing, could be the whole amount. Aged UK have a really good financial section on their website and also have advisers if the situation is not clear cut. My experience is over 6 years on costs but you're looking at about £20-30 per hour.

It's worth thinking about non-caring support too as it's cheaper, eg cleaners, gardeners, laundry, ready meal service.
Please also try and build in time out of the house - especially for your DM if she's more able. So paying for someone to be in the home for a morning / afternoon so your Mum can get out and about is well worth it. My parents were reluctant at first but did join a local group for tea dances, singing sessions etc. They both enjoyed it and my Dad still volunteers though mum died 2 years ago.

Get an assessment after the 6 weeks are up amd ask social services for help
Look at 'contuining healthcare'

If he will be self-funding ask SS for a list of local care companies. There are websites that do reviews and you can also ask on local Facebook groups.

If he won't be totally self-funding start with a SS needs assessment.

If you do self-fund my only advice would be to use an agency rather than one individual carer, as sickness and holidays should be covered.

If your parents are self-funding, google 'elder care at home' plus their location and you will get a list of agencies. Call a couple and ask them to come and do a needs assessment. I used Home Instead for my mother and they were excellent.

If your parents will be funded by the local authority, call Social Services and ask them to do the needs assessment and they will provide the carers.

Make sure you install cameras in every room the carers will be in , pack away anything of value and spot check the carers if you can keep a very very close eye

You may find that you can keep exactly the same carers and agency but just be charged in future.

Try Curam, website to connect with carers. Or local companies. Connect with your local carers’ group, they are very helpful

It sounds like he has come home with something like a Discharge To Assess (D2A) package of care (can also sometimes be called intermediate care or reablement) which would usually mean that it's put in place by the hospital to get someone home initially and social services will be in touch shortly to arrange an assessment and plan with your dad what happens next.

If the carers are carers from a care agency then you will probably just be able to keep the same ones on if you are happy with them. If they are employed directly by the hospital or Adult social care then they will arrange towards the end of the support to give the care over to a care agency unless you tell them not to.

often the ‘temporary’ carers will become permanent if they feel there is a long term care need. Speak to the current carers about this. If they feel he does not meet the criteria for long term care you may need to look at private agencies such as Curum Care or local ‘micro providers’.

My mother had the reablement package and even though the cares were aware that she could not take herself to the bathroom, couldn't move between the living room and the bedroom, etc offered no further help. Two years down the line when we finally got the assessment we had been asking for from Social Services from that time I begged them to speak to me separately from my mum so that I could be honest about the toll her care was taking on me. But they did a joint assessment and suggested no support for me whatsoever. It was then six months after the assessment before a care agency had space to take on mum's care.

So don't wait until the end of the 6 weeks. Start asking for Social Services now.