Hospital

[Xatz63]

My mother has had a 3rd admission within 8 weeks She has heart failure and kidney disease also has copd and diabetes. They have sorted out the breathing somewhat but still breathless when breathing. She is mentally aware and when I visit she can be sometimes positive or negative.
Am I being unrealistic that she will come out fine ? Or should I be expecting the worst I'm so not sure how to deal with this has anyone been through this

I could have written your post...my elderly mum with both kidney and heart failure just discharged post a bout of pneumonia.Scary stuff and it's knocked the stuffing out of her.At their age it's hard to know, especially with constant fluid build up etc.I don't see my mum returning to her baseline but maybe your mum will get on better.They are made of resilient stuff!

I’m an elderly nurse so I guess if you want a realistic view, heart failure paired with failing kidneys isn’t a good combination ☹️ it’s horrid as they need to get rid of fluid build up for the heart, but the kidneys need fluid so what one of them likes (kidneys), the heart doesn’t. It’s a constant juggling act and our doctors often say if they could inject fluid straight to the kidneys without it affecting the heart, it would be ideal.

To some extent symptoms can be managed, I’m guessing she’ll have had iv furosemide infusions and oral replacement like bumetanide between admissions, but depending on severity, it’s not curable. Do they think the breathlessness despite treatment is from the COPD or do they still think it’s down to the heart failure? It’s so common in frailty, but it is horrible as must be so scary for them to feel like they can’t breathe. Sending best wishes and I hope they manage to get on top of it a bit better for your mum 🌺

Thankyou xxx its bloody tough and a day by day thing so will see how it goes

@Xatz63 it's hard to predict. I have a DGM in hospital with pneumonia, chest infection plus heart failure and kidney problems. It's the fourth admission in 7 months Each admission results in more frailty, but DGM isn't good at accepting her physical limitations. Sending unmumsnetty hugs to you, the only advice I can offer is a take each day as it comes approach and be prepared to advocate for proper care and support post discharge if she is weakened, including the option of residential reablement care when she is ready to leave hospital.

I had a v similar situation with my mum who also had COPD, heart failure, kidney damage. She was in and out of hospital for 2 years, primarily with breathing difficulties. Each time we nearly lost her. But she rallied after being on a non invasive intubation machine for a couple of weeks. However, for some inexplicable reason, mum decided to start smoking again which worsened her COPD again and she was admitted to hospital on 19 Dec with her sats in their 60’s and she died within 8 hours of admission.
Be aware your mum is very frail, and will probably be gradually deteriorating, but it’s difficult to predict when which hospital admission will be the final one. My brother stopped taking her admissions seriously as she kept bouncing back, but that meant he unfortunately wasn’t there at the end.

My Mother got close to death quite a few times but from her fifties in the 1980’s when I was a child, she survived 4 heart attacks. We really thought she was never going to die because it happened so much.

They will make her as comfortable as possible whatever happens, just be with her when you can as love is the best medicine alongside all the pills and machines.

Unfortunately “making her as comfortable as possible “ is no longer a given in our broken NHS. My mum’s death was not at all comfortable. I was told afterwards by the Medical Examiner that waiting 6 hours for the syringe driver was the best the NHS could do due to staffing shortages. She died 10 mins after getting the syringe driver. I will be haunted by those last 6 hours of her life for the rest of my life.

Thankyou everyone for your messages .
My mum still.breathless now on a isolation unit she is not on oxygen anymore but having a nebuliser to help her.
I did ring the ward for a update and they say more concentrating on her breathing and the respiratory team will see her .
I've been to see her today and we had to put apron gloves and mask.on as norovirus on the ward..
I dont get why she isn't on oxygen when breathing isn't good

I'm scared of asking the nurses or whoever because I'm frightened of the answer I suppose

Hope your mum recovers soon, it is so difficult when they are chronically unwell and in and out of hospital- my own mum has a different health issue but i know how hard it is.

To answer your question about why she's not on oxygen when she is breathless:

A lot of people with COPD are used to living with lower than normal oxygen levels so their body adapts. If they are given too much oxygen then their carbon dioxide levels can build up too high and their lungs cannot expel it effectively. This causes confusion and drowsiness and can ultimately suppress the brain's 'respiratory drive' the signals that stimulate the lungs to breathe. This is not the case for everyone with COPD, but it sounds likely that it is the case with your mum- Dr's can do an arterial blood gas to find out if this is the case.

It is worth calling for an update (or visiting during the day if this is possible) on Monday after the weekend and asking to speak to the Dr's so you can get a full explanation of the plan and what they think the future prognosis is.

Sending love and strength to you and your mum 💐

Thankyou that helps xxx

I am so grateful for every message I've had on here it really is helping me ,my mum is still breathless when she moves and now they have norovirus on the ward I'm just taking it day by day but each of you who have replied are helping me .Thankyou x