Has anyone found a live in carer through The Lady?

[NetZeroZealot]

DP have a self contained annex so we are looking at this as a good option. And think hiring direct will save on going through an agency.
They already have quite good support - cleaner, gardener, & carer who comes in twice a week. But struggling with day to day practicalities.
Is The Lady a good place to find this help or is it only for the very grand?

The Lady isn’t published anymore…

Call Universal Aunts, they’re brilliant and the same sort of people.

But they still do classified ads

https://classifieds.lady.co.uk/adverts/personals

It's online @Tormundsbeard

One of my guilty pleasures is reading the personals for a laugh classifieds.lady.co.uk/adverts/personals

Yes it’s online. There are several people advertising their services on there who seem to offer what we need. I just wondered if they are likely to be suitable. I am close to breaking point after 2 crises with DM in the space of a week.
I will also look at Universal Aunts but tink they are an agency & will charge more?

Can the Carer’s hours be upped until you’ve got a live-in Carer sorted?

Yes, that is what we are doing as an interim measure.

Crikey that was... interesting!

How can someone be simultaneously traditional in values and open minded I wonder.

Are you confident that you can fulfil all your employer obligations that an agency would handle?

Yes. I had a nanny when my kids were small. I should think it’s quite similar.

I’d recommend an agency as they have to provide cover for breaks and illness etc.

The virtue of agencies is that you have cover in the event of sickness/holiday/resignation and all NI etc is dealt with.

I’d go for it. We recently had a bit of a disaster with a live in carer from a well-regarded agency. Dp’s mum went from calling her a new granddaughter to freezing her out and referring to her as ‘that woman’ within 3 weeks. Live in care is very intimate and requires careful interviewing. It may not work, but going for a personalised process at least gives you a bit more control.

Yep. That was... like the Lady as I remember it, rewritten by Viz.

""joie do vie"... Plus what's the French for "a nurse with a purse (and a car)"?

I found several lovely jobs through The Lady magazine when I was younger, including abroad!

Yes, my colleague found a carer for his
mum through The Lady. It's all working out well for them

Still do online ads.

I would go with an agency who at least have to carry out some minimal vetting.

I think you have to be quite hard nosed about what you are getting in the scenario where you employ one individual without agency back up. It is unlikely to be someone who just loves dealing with all the stresses of an elederly person with dementia. They are low paid workers who are looking for free accommodation while doing a bare minimum. The best you can hope for is benign neglect. Because they work alone there is no real day to day safeguarding. There is no cover when they are sick or have family emergencies or holidays.

It may work at the beginning while one or both parents have capacity but once they start to lose it you have no real check on what is going on. Cameras maybe?

I speak from the perspective of someone whose elderly parents daily help, employed by them for four to five hours a day for thirty years or so, started changing hours and days and radically cutting back on the number of hours actually spent at the house. I trusted this woman implicitly but only learned this because the neighbours tipped me off.

Just because someone pays for an advert in an online location connected to a (defunct) magazine for old posh people, doesn't mean they're especially trustworthy. In fact you might think someone would go exactly there if they wanted to fleece a rich old person out of all their dough.

Obviously I will do my own due diligence. I’m used to hiring people.