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Elderly parents

Mum refusing food & drink in hospital, what happens next?

85 replies

Mini712 · 29/10/2025 18:06

My DM has been in hospital for a week for dehydration & breathlessness. She had been refusing food & drink at home which why she ended up in hospital. She agreed to go into hospital as my DD & GP told her it would be for one day!
She went on a drip for a day & the cardiac team tweaked her meds & prescribed a high doses of vitamin D for the breathlessness but so far we have seen no improvement and if anything she is getting worse. She is now saying she is unable to stand without support & is pretty much declining most food and more worryingly fluids. The nurses think it’s behaviour & are getting frustrated with her because they think she is not cooperating deliberately. Dad & I have desperately been trying to encourage her to eat & drink but she makes up excuses or just says no. The general medical team are trying to find out what’s wrong but all her bloods are fine & her CT scan that she had in July is clear.
What will the hospital do if she continues to not eat or drink? She doesn’t have a diagnosis for dementia but clearly something is not right!

OP posts:
Mini712 · 09/11/2025 15:41

Mum passed away peacefully yesterday with her family around her.
We didn’t get a formal diagnosis but the neurologist suggested that Mum was in the final stages of motor neurone disease. Medically she had come to the end of the road.
It’s been an incredibly tough 3 weeks but we are grateful that Mum had a peaceful & pain free death with her family by her side.

OP posts:
Anditstartedagain · 09/11/2025 15:45

I am so sorry for your loss. You must all be exhausted. For me the second day was when everything felt real.

There is a really good bereavement board on MN full of helpful and kind people.

For now, try and be gentle and kind to yourself.

Mini712 · 09/11/2025 15:51

@Anditstartedagain thank you for your kind words.
I’m staying at my parents house and I’m surrounded by Mum. Seeing her slippers by the side of the bed just sets me off all over again😢

OP posts:
PermanentTemporary · 09/11/2025 15:52

Ach im so sorry for your loss. I hope that you feel a sense of her being at peace. 💐

Anditstartedagain · 09/11/2025 15:58

Mini712 · 09/11/2025 15:51

@Anditstartedagain thank you for your kind words.
I’m staying at my parents house and I’m surrounded by Mum. Seeing her slippers by the side of the bed just sets me off all over again😢

From now until the funeral is particularly odd space and time. I hope you’re able to take the time of work you need. GPs will normally issue a sick note.

Rictasmorticia · 09/11/2025 16:39

I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your mum. Sending you love❤️

Blushingm · 09/11/2025 16:44

Mini712 · 29/10/2025 18:43

@PermanentTemporary no not yet. No one from the medical team have mentioned EOL.

Wrong thread sorry

softstone · 09/11/2025 17:01

So sorry for your loss OP.

Magnificentkitteh · 09/11/2025 17:27

I am so sorry for your loss OP. It sounds like she was making the most of life for as lonh as she reasonably could. I'm glad you were able to be with her at the end.

Laffydaffy · 10/11/2025 06:19

That was so quick. So very sorry, OP 💐

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