Parents are approx 70 (DM) and 73 (DF). DM has had hip and knee replacement, femur pinned and has broken just about every bone there is due to osteoporosis.
DF had has one hip done and is awaiting the second. He's barely able to walk the length of the living room unaided.
Both mentally fine, a little forgetful tbh, especially DF but I suspect it's pain related as he's exhausted by the pain all the time.
I live over 700 miles away, they moved away over 20 years ago. DB is over 200 miles from them.
I've just discovered via DF accidentally letting it slip that DM no longer cooks because she apparently can't stand at the cooker long enough. DF is an "adventurous" chef and is not to be trusted with food combinations or have any sense of portion control, so I worry for them both for the longer term if he's taking over....
DM is an ex nurse and a stubborn pfffft. DF is very much a stubborn old goat but I can usually manage him. Not so DM. She's apparently turning into my granny who was housebound and barely moved from her armchair for the last 20 years of her life.
This is the beginning of it all, isn't it?
They are in a bungalow, both are sufficiently tech savvy not to need me to sort things like phones or computers thank god, both have good pensions so money isn't a big area of concern around carers, they have a cleaner, both can drive although DM won't go much further than the next town and DF does all the distance - they were down here a few months ago for example. Both have mobility scooters including lighter (but still heavy!) ones that go in the car.
I suppose I'm just venting a bit. DM is an ex nurse, she retired as a District Nurse Sister so has always said she didn't want us to be her carers which we couldn't anyway due to distance. But she's refusing things like a perching still to help her in the kitchen 🤦.
No idea where to go from here!
All related whinging very welcome.