I have written here before. In a nutshell I live in the UK, my DM (mid 80s) on the Continent. She is relatively well and healthy/ independent for her age. I visit 2x a year despite not having a bed to sleep on (that is another matter). She has new neighbours above her (apartment). Her apartment is large and comfortable and she has been there nearly 40years. She has lovely neighbours (other than above). New neighbours caused couple of floodings this year due to faulty in pipework that now has been assesed and will be fixed, however... She has this fixation about moving to a different flat. I asked her where would she like to move (part of city) she doesnt know. I told her that now she is central and has a lovely community (yet she moans about them), if she sells her property she will lose money (market in that country) and she will have to downsize, her flat will be knocked on the price as it needs refurb, a new porperty will need refurb as well. There are legal costs associated that will add up. There is a period between her selling and buying and where would she live interim? Who will pack her 3 bedrooms? (I live abroad). How is she planning to pay for the property if she will lose money anyway? She has no smart phone or email yet is adamant she can handle anything - yet she cant answer simple question where is she moving to? Her cognitive decline started a year ago and is slow but noticeable. She is agressive towrds me each time I ask her simple questions so this week she bluntly said that she wants me to come over now (drop everything) and talk to her and plan, and help her sell and buy and contribute financially to it all. Basically she wants me to take the budren of the entire sell buy move process at the cost of my personal life because she says so. I am currently out of work trying to move away from freelance into perm, I have stresses around my health and my partner who is much older than me and I really do not have anymore to give into her irrational demands. How would you go about it? I do have boundaries. I am in therapy but she is relentless in that plan of getting me over there and beig her lady in waiting. She told me I can get a teaching job or something to get pocket money. Mum I have a life to live, I have no employment history in her country really and will not work as part time teacher, I am not even qualified to be one. She seems to have this little plan and steam roll it. She told me this week she is very ill (she isn't), she can not cope (she copes very well is fit for her age) and she needs to move. Sadly I wasnt quick enough as i should have said 'well mum if you are so ill then a move in your state would be very risky to your health as it is too much stress'. I am exhausted; this whole week already is a mess for me. I have my own problems which she has no clue about and I am at the end of my tether. How do you approach this? Any tips? Or just words of courage.