Wheb you live abroad -The call to come visit for likely the last time..

[Enko]

My dad has been unwell since May. Keeps falling and was laying on the floor for 48 hours before being found. Is confused has been in and out of hospital and rehabilitation centre since early May.

Today he is back in hospital and my sister said if she was me she would come visit.

I feel strange.. my mother died 10 years ago so I know what loosing a parent feels like. However mum died suddenly and unexpectedly. Dad may be like mil and go slowly over years - though he has always said he would only get to 84.

I didnt grow up w my dad - divorced parents in the 70s meqnt I saw him every 3 weeks until age 12 when he started taking me out for dinner once a month. Sister and brother lived w him..

Its a strange feeling

I dont truly know why Im posting I just wondered if others have experienced this if you dont live in your birth country and your parents still are there?

Go. My DB urged me to visit as the end was near and my DM died surrounded by my siblings. I feel regret that I put my work responsibilities above my DM and didn't get the earliest flight.

Go. Not my parents but my grandmother was fading and family suggested it was time to come. I took dd and we got to spend some time with her. I had to go home again and she died about a week later. I felt bad I wasn’t there but she was surrounded by others.

I intend to go for sure. I will sort it with my boss tomorrow.

I just feel so strange.

I didnt have a good relationship with parents, very low contact most my adult life. I was NC with my mum when she died 18 months ago I didnt go to the funeral. I had regular phone contact with my dad since, I didnt want to be unkind. He had been in and out of hospital all this year but I knew when he went in again in July after a fall he wouldnt be coming out. I have animals so not a simple case of booking a flight, a friend offered to stay a few days. My dad was happy I was coming but died the day before I arrived. It was for the best I didnt want to see him so diminished and unable to communicate. I was also NC with siblings so it was odd/sad staying at dads house 2 days but it gave us a chance to decide to use a probate solicitor to keep contact to a minimum. Sometimes closure is a good thing but had friend not been available I wouldnt have lost any sleep over it. I am sorry to sound so cold but my parents were awful, I was neglected as a child so I never felt any obligation to care for them.