My dad has been in hospital for over a week following a heart attack. He is now medically fit for discharge but needs assessment by the physio and occupational therapists. His mobility is extremely limited, his memory is very poor, and he has numerous minor needs. My elderly mother and I have reached the difficult decision that it is no longer safe for him or her to have him cared for at home. We have been to look at a care home and the plan is that he will be discharged from hospital directly into the home, probably next week.
He will hate the idea. He doesn’t see why he isn’t at home now. Partly that’s because he doesn’t remember the heart attack, and partly because while he is in hospital with people to help him with everything, he feels quite well. He has no idea how hard life has been for Mum over the last year. They have had carers coming in, but she has also done a lot and she is exhausted. We’ve discussed 24/7 care at home but there are a lot of reasons why this won’t work.
I actually think he will settle quite quickly and contentedly into life at the home, but the prospect of telling him - and it will have to be done repeatedly because of his memory problems - is daunting.
Does anyone have experience of this and suggestions of what to say/not say?