Help please with Mens super absorbent Incontinence pants

[Kevinbaconsrealwife]

Hi all,

I wonder if you can help me…. My lovely dad,84, has deteriorated physically so much the last 6 months bless him, now including nighttime urinary incontinence…we have tried Tena Men in Super but he’s soaking through them….please can you wonderful collective of Mumsnetters recommend the best and most absorbent Male incontinence pants ( not really pads he prefers pants) …thank you so much in advance for all your help..

sending you all support as none of us are on here for a laugh !!!!!

Has he had any support from a continence Nurse? An elderly relation of mine was referred to this Service I think by somebody at the hospital when they had been an impatient and they were provided with suitable products

Are you in the UK?

He needs GP to refer to the continence nursing team.

Thank you both of you…..ok that’s great I shall ask tomorrow about a continence nurse and yes I’m in the UK…..sorry I didn’t reply individually h E had about 5 hours sleep in 2 days…..thanks again xx

A lot of older men have a urine bottle by the bed so they don't have to get up. Maybe this would help if DF could manage to use it if he woke in the night? Medication is available too which will reduce the volume of urine he passes.

Thank you I will ask about medication…..the problem is he sleeps right through and doesn’t know he’s wee’d bless him….

@Kevinbaconsrealwife I dipped in because I was kind of hoping for product recommendations… to see if there are any we have not already tried. So to nudge anyone willing to do so, I’ll share a few things.

1. what the continence service will prescribe differs in different areas.

2. while the nurses have been lovely, it helps a lot if the patient will follow basic advice such as avoiding caffeine.

3. pads (worn with stretchy fixation pants) have a higher ml that they will absorb on the packet but they don’t absorb quickly and I get complaints they are uncomfortable and it’s like sitting in a puddle

4. we’re yet to find an effective product for a side sleeper

5. if not already diagnosed, get him tested for diabetes.

The pernicious sleep deprivation has had such an impact on quality of life. I hope you can crack this for your lovely Dad.

Thank you so so much for your lovely reply…..bless you….and if I come across anything I think will help you then I will be in touch….thank you again for your warmth, I feel less alone xx

@Kevinbaconsrealwife you’re so welcome, I’ve lived through unexplained incontinence with a child as well as a parent now and it’s not talked about enough. I hope I’m paying it forward a little because MN has been an amazing resource for all my questions!

I forgot to mention that if you buy products through an organisation like Age Uk then they can take off VAT as it’s for a medical need (might be helpful if you need to wait for incontinence clinic and if they prescribe x per day and it’s not quite enough).

Also, the best washable bed protectors we found were Lynmark (available from Amazon - used as well as the pants in bed, in case of leaks) and absorbent flat pads worked better for us than the tuck in type. Disposable bed pads are strangely not that absorbent and are noisier.

Look on Incontinence Choice for products. You can buy gel sachets and liners for bed pans etc.
puppy Pads are good to protect the sheets (probably cheaper than the adult ones.)

Hi

we get the men’s pull ups from Aldi - a fraction of the price of the Tena pads. I think make sure you don’t go when Aldi is busy, because they often sell out quickly. A continence nurse will be able to prescribe extra pads to be mailed to him (my dad wears both pull ups and pad).

the other things is a convene - basically conform with a long tube into a bag, which the nurse can also prescribe for your dad to put on himself. It’s good when they’re not waking up when they need to pee - they hold the urine v reliably.

good luck!

*a condom, not conform lol.

Firstly I want to thank you all for your help at what was a difficult time for dad and me ( one of many difficult times as we all know)…. So I want to share what has been working so far ( touch wood) for dad……we are going for the double in approach…..he has a maxi men’s pad from Viracare put into his own normal briefs (they have sticky back like sanitary towels) then over the top of them he wears a pair of Drylife Maxi men’s incontinence pants…..so far so good and while the pad nd incontinence pants are sodden every morning we have had no wet bed !!! I’m painfully aware this could change tomorrow …lol….but for now I just hope this combo brings some help to someone…
thank you all again xx

My df uses vivacitive: they do pads and pants

slight off topic but you can get amazing waterproof mattress covers quilts and pillows
then when the inevitable happens mop everything up with the sheets quick spray and wipe down all bedding in machine rinse and a spin them washed with a cap full of detol thrown in still not great but makes cleanup very fast

Thank you both , it’s so hard , it’s nice to be ble to offer suggestions to each other xx

We generally get dad the Drylife Pants Maxi nighttime pants. When they weren’t in stock we tried the Drylife Pants Ultima- generally more for daytime than night - but found them just as absorbent and feel a bit softer too. Very absorbent for heavy use.

Also these are great on top of the sheet. Comfy Life ultra bed mats from Amazon.

I’d agree with incontinence nurse. An elderly relative had overnight catheters. It was a bit like a small condom with a funnel that attached to a bag that went into a bag in his pj bottoms. It sounds like a faff but the carers used to pop it on / remove in morning and ws much more straightforward than the pants : waterproof sheets combo.

Thanks for reporting back @Kevinbaconsrealwife - glad you’ve found things that help and appreciate you reviving the thread.

I think our Dad might have polyuria so it’s how quickly products can absorb as well but Drylife are worth a try as 3000ml which is the highest I’ve seen.

Ah thank you sweetheart, I hoped you were all getting on ok….good luck with the dry life…..all I will say is “ so far so good”…. Sending you un MN hugs xxxx