Elderly female incontinence

[Noominia]

Hoping for any positive stories/ideas here.
My aunt is in her mid 80s, in decent health but increasingly worried about urinary incontinence. She went to a clinic and they fitted her with a pessary which doesn’t seem to have made much if any difference. It makes me sad to see somebody who is actually reasonably active and mentally pretty good, but is now limiting her outings because she is worried about wetting herself especially if she stays anywhere overnight. She uses Tena and can put incontinence pads in the bed but is still worried that she might leak onto somebody else’s mattress or bedclothes.
Any thoughts on treatment would be really welcome.

I'd encourage her to go back to the clinic and explain what's going on. Practical things would be disposable pads for the bed when she's away and you can buy washable ones for when she's at home if she needs it.

I agree another visit to the continence team would be helpful.

But in the meantime there is a product called a Kylie sheet which may be bigger so more reassuring than the pads she uses. I know quite a few people who have used and recommended them. There are other cheaper brands but I don't know if they are as effective. (Edit, sorry for the horrible looking link!)

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Kylie-Washable-Absorbent-Incontinence-Waterproof/dp/B00V4YOP16/ref=sr_1_15?adgrpid=50641584222&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.r-j9lZ0_Lf0U0BTHvaAIZ_hA2AXaIA2wTxX0LojFLtRSdhZgkjJHnsTfQ-WY2uVzIVer7FbDAcOT9pk1AW8M6iBcTuFLRi0TVtNbhN9cincGY6VYewd83gxPxSEeHofaFMDCMEGiFAdgNR8-uEAoOPGczY6QEokQqgpiPnheXMt-uzm4YZvjo52jvbMeabQkTsFQv6ObE--QIDP-4sXQO7oX35-l5Hfy2HpClzXvUJJKTiUXeJFwdyHRQ2KoE3wb_aebYpxLF8eLcBaLLllMoR6cV4x9gGXRqsyE5oauY1g.go4SywfCrICcHejKF2mfw0hB18JaNj1onu0wOYtyZX0&dib_tag=se&gad_source=1&hvadid=259030424139&hvdev=c&hvexpln=0&hvlocphy=20339&hvnetw=g&hvocijid=8437615760503217256--&hvqmt=e&hvrand=8437615760503217256&hvtargid=kwd-315857061240&hydadcr=28147_1821040&keywords=kylie%2Bsheets&mcid=f8280351fd5f3856b61276f561342d01&qid=1749833635&sr=8-15&th=1

Watching with interest as my dm is in the same position. She has urge incontinence. We’ve found that using a commode near the bed helps during the night but just like hou we are buying pads and sheets etc.. nothing seems to help

My mum has had this terribly for the last 6 months to a year.

She's in hospital for a mild stroke at the moment and as part of her investigations she had a ct scan

The stroke doctor said she also had query hydrocephalus. He asked her if she had urinary incontinence. Apparently it's a symptom in hydrocephalus in the elderly.

Obviously I may be way off suggesting this but obviously, as it's just come up with mum, I thought I should mention it.