Is there any way I can stop a parent saying this

[RebelliousHoping]

Hi,

I’m quite vulnerable in that I live alone, I can’t drive to get appointments, I can’t put shoes on, I don’t have a partner but next of kin are parents (one of whom is just a nightmare, and who are deeply concerning me at what they are allowed to say.)

some mad things they’ve come out with

”I’ve broke my neck” correction - I have had a spinal infusion C4/C5.
“I’ve been wrongly diagnosed with diabetes for years” correction - my GP said I could stop Metformin as of 4 months ago I was placed on pathway to remission. Even my own mother attended that appointment to know what is truth.
to the latest problem
”I’ve had Necrotizing Fascitis” correction - no one has 💯 confirmed this!

I try and butt in, speak over them in front of medics but seriously how do I get them to stop.

Hiya - I am sorry you are going through this but I would recommend a private chat and get it put on your notes that you want you be in appts alone - can you get an advocate?

That must be deeply frustrating and very annoying.

I take it that your parents are driving you to appointments and coming into the actual appointment with you. How would you manage if they weren't available? Would it be possible to set up an arrangement which worked for you and didn't involve your parents?

can you have a set of business cards made that you can give to any medical professionals? have written on the cards the three most important points of your medical history and include 'please ask me directly about my care - my carers don't always know the answers'.

You don't involve them in your appointments, look up local advocacy services and the GP or hospital can arrange transport, in what way are you vulnerable that they need to sit in on your appointments, the doctors and clinics have all your history and a nurse can be a chaperone if you need help undressing.

Yep, again they turn up to be here for when district nurse arrives going over this whole painful business.

Then giving their pearls of wisdom that if I walk around to much in their opinion and now it’s been seen I’m actually working from sofa at home, I’ll be attending GP surgery to see nurse and all that means. Sorry this must come across funny but it is starting to get to me.

advocate - is that a social worker? I have a brother but he is paralysed himself so quite limited. I’m under 60 so know the elderly charities can’t help get me one.
business cards - love it thank you.

Just ridiculous things are being said like hope I’m not driving my manual car, why on earth would I put someone else’s life in danger to get into a motor with a pretty heavy leg and no idea in this world whether I can now control that car’s exceleration pedal.

What's your situation here, and why are your parents speaking for you?
Is it the case that they were giving information when you were unable to? If so, I'd suggest getting a medicalert band and registering your (correct) information with medicalert. If you are unable to speak for yourself, medics can use the band to access your information directly, without relying on misinterpretation from your parents.

If it's the case that they are speaking for or over you during appointments when you're able and have capacity to speak for yourself, you have several options. You can ask them directly not to be present, however I recognise that's not always possible. Or you can ask for a note to be added to the front of your medical records for the medic to ask your parents to leave - most medical professionals are pretty skilled at doing this.

The car thing just sounds like they're concerned about you and are just checking in. I'd let that one go....

What is your condition that they need to be there, your nurse or GP can arrange a chaperone, is it a physical disability you have. Look up advocacy services, it's all,online, they just support you. Donf forget that next of kin has no legal meaning so they have no right to know your medical problems, appointments or speak for you.