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Elderly parents

Parents who are so stoic you actually wish they would ask for more.

3 replies

PermanentTemporary · 06/03/2025 08:15

I am frequently on here moaning about, not my mum but the situation around her. I am quite horrible sometimes about what it has taken. I wanted to say something about an older person who is much beloved and where the situation is so much better managed, if awful.

I'm thinking about my dear FIL. He has terminal cancer. He tells me just about enough of what us going on, while remaining very private, for me to understand the outline of what symptoms he is having. He has got the community palliative care team in touch and a good GP so none of us have to worry too much about the medical side. He is determinedly maintaining his social life via longstanding friends and the U3A, despite being widowed this year (MIL had advanced dementia and was in a nursing home). He is slowly but steadily giving things away, though he was never a hoarder, so it's not going to be a challenge to deal with the house. He has refused any more invasive treatment so probably has a year or so left. We speak regularly and he always has news and things to say, recommending TV programmes and books. He's always interested in our lives.

It's horrible that he is dying but he is doing it with such grace. He's a role model.

OP posts:
RandomDays · 06/03/2025 16:56

Such a heartwarming ♥️ post @PermanentTemporary , to hear of a considerate, kind, elderly person dealing with age, decline and even death with grace. We hear so much about selfish, difficult or demanding elderly parents on here it’s so good to hear of the example of people like your FIL 🙏 .

RandomDays · 06/03/2025 17:22

good and touching I meant to say.

Mum5net · 06/03/2025 23:16

He’s what I’m striving to be.
Can you bring him a chilled bottle of alcohol free lager to your next meet up.? He sounds like he’d appreciate the effort.

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