My Mum passed away suddenly 4 years ago which was a massive shock. I was very very close to her and she was the most wonderful Mum, my best friend, and an amazing Nanny to my children. My Dad has been struggling without her for the last 4 years, as have we all and its been a really tough time adjusting to life without her.
My Dad has now just been diagnosed, out of the blue, with an aortic aneurysm. As its very large, and he is over 80 and in quite poor health, they will not operate as he will not survive the operation. Therefore the only option left is to leave it to its own devices. As its very large and growing fairly quickly they have told him there is nothing they can do for him and the only option now is that he lives with this ticking time bomb inside him which can rupture and kill him at any given moment. Their diagnosis and best guess scenario is that he has no more than a maximum of 2 years before this ruptures and kills him. 2 years is being very optimistic.
As a family we are all in shock and my poor Dad has to live with, what is effectively, a bomb inside his body. We have vowed to make what is left of his time left (however long that may be) as best as we can for him and plan to do as much as we can this year. We have told him, if there is anything he has particularly wanted to do (other than going somewhere on an aeroplane for obvious reasons) that now is the time to do it.
It just feels so sad and its hard to get my head round that fact that we are at end of life for him. Everytime I call him and he doesn't answer I imagine him dead and that it has burst and he has gone.
How do you cope with the terminal illness of a loved one? My Mum's death was so sudden that we had no time to prepare or say goodbye to her which was utterly horrific and painful but somehow this feels just as bad.