Ageing mum has started to smell - worried

[Squirrel81]

I’ve not really ever been around old people much until now because my grandparents died when I was very young so this is new to me.

My mum is in her 70s now and the last two times I’ve seen her she’s had an almost sewegy smell or a bit like something is rotting. It sounds so awful to say and she is the cleanest person ever so I know it’s not bad hygiene. She seems healthy but I don’t know if she gets regular doctors check ups. She’s also still all there mentally.

Has anyone else experienced this and what could it be? Could it be something worrying? I am a worrier. We have poor communication in our family and I don’t know whether to raise it or if it will just make her feel bad when she can’t do anything about it.

I am pregnant, tired, stressed, a lot on my mind and adding this is taking its toll.

It could be your sense of smell has changed due to pregnancy hormones, it's pretty common?

Could it be the pregnancy? I hated the smell of my MIL when I was pregnant, it used to make me feel sick, when the baby was born she smelt ok again I still don’t like her

This might be completely untrue, but could it be a forgotten tampon?
You say she's the cleanest person you know, but we can all forget that no matter how clean we are. Sorry if that's not the case/TMI. xxx

I would guess a combination of hypersensitive nose due to pregnancy, plus possibly the start of 'old person smell' https://www.agingcare.com/articles/old-person-smell-174839.htm, which is actually a real thing.

It is also possible that your mother is starting to experince continence issues, and her declining sense of smell with ageing means she doesn't notice any odour. Does she have any other regular visitors you could discreetly ask if they have noticed anything? Or you might just have to wait until you have had the baby and see if the smell magically goes away...

A forgotten tampon sounds extremely implausible for a woman in her 70s. Are you a male poster?

I know pregnancy nose is a thing but so is nonenal - the smell some elder people get due to something in their sweat. It's quite distinctive and unpleasant but I wouldn't really describe it as "sewagy". Could she be having continence issues? Maybe suggest she sees her GP for a wellness health check?

Could it be that she's using incontinence pads but not changing enough?

Either because she's hardly got any and won't be at the shops much so makes them last, or she can't afford them?

Has she had a benefits check if it could be the latter?

Would she talk about bathing and bladder issues with you? Could she be scared of falling in the bath or shower?

Does anyone else else smell anything? If you've had a respiratory infection lately you could have phantosmia and mum doesn't actually smell at all.

Could be that bacteria infection in the gut sometimes that smells really bad.

A 70 year old woman will not be using tampons!

😂😂😂 forgotten for like 20 years?

I worked in supported living and once commented on the unusual and unpleasant smell of a resident and was told the elderly can give off a smell if they have an infection. He had a chest infection (so not like am open wound that may smell), it was so bizarre! I had never heard of this before.

I can smell my family when they are unwell.
Its a sweet/ unpleasant cloying smell.
Often before the person is showing symptoms.
Possibly your mom is developing an infection/ illness?

Could be a pessary ring? Does she have gynae problems?

It's likely your pregancy sensitive nose however has she got any rashes or lumps on her arms etc?
In nursing homes with much older residents than your mum but if we noticed smells we'd check the skin. I hope she's alright and it's just a joy of pregancy for you!

I agree with the infection idea. When my son had a chest infection he smelled funny, as did my husband when his appendix burst. Does she have any symptoms of anything unusual?

No, I'm not male, I just said something without thinking.
Sorry, OP.

I was wondering about it being an infection or sign of an illness. I read it can be a sign of kidney or liver issues. I don’t think it is my pregnancy although perhaps that is exaggerating the smell - my husband can smell it but he doesn’t think it’s sewegy!

I generally am right when it comes to instinct and something being wrong with someone in my family, I’m getting tired of being the first to notice things that are wrong. Sometimes I think my family is just oblivious!

The points about old person smell are interesting! I am also concerned about bringing it up and damaging her self confidence. It’s not as bad as walking past someone with BO to be honest because it isn’t as strong as that. But it is certainly unpleasant.

Thanks for all the replies I wonder what I should do 🙈

Maybe in the summer heat, she's got something rotting in her fridge or kitchen cupboards? Potatoes or carrots shes forgotten about. Is it worse in one room in particular or just lingering all over the place? Could be hightened smell senses due to pregnancy.

Could she have vaginal discharge? Many many years ago my mum noticed my grandmother was smelling and that’s what it turned out to be. Unfortunately my grandmother was embarrassed so had just tried to ignore it. Maybe casually bring up smear tests in conversation if you think it could be that?

If she is only 70s I would not have thought it was old age

Has she got any wounds?

They can smell if they need treating.

I'm not going to be popular on here but old people do smell, sorry. It's not necessarily a cause for concern. A few years ago when we were all less PC it was joked about that old people smell like cabbage. Not very nice or fair but there's a grain of truth in it! Same as teenage boys smell like sweaty feet, menstruating women sometimes smell like period blood, little babies smell like poo and milk, it's one of those things. We're so divorced from the realities of life now we forget old people have a smell. Which they do.

Interestingly I could always smell when my parents were unwell. Generally infections but in the most extreme case I walked into my Nana's room one day and walked straight out and said to my mum I'd just smelt death. We all left because she was fine but the nursing home called us back a couple of hours later and she died that night.
I'm not suggesting it's anything like that but I can often smell when people aren't well. As I say, usually an infection that gets identified soon after and treated. Quite how you then get someone checked out on the strength of that I'm not sure.
It may be coming from her stomach as a lot of smells emanate from there on the breath.

Perhaps she is constipated and it is her breath that is creating the smell.