Who can I get to carry my mum downstairs?

[NameChangePropertyAdvice]

Mum has Alzheimer's and since falling and breaking her wrist 4 months ago has refused to use the stairs at home so she has been living upstairs. Dad lives with her and is her full time carer, with help from a care agency who come in 4 times a day.

Dad's decided - rightly I think - that they would be better living downstairs where there's a bathroom and a room they could put beds in. Social services might be able to organise mum being carried down the stairs, but it's not a certainty and could take weeks if not months to arrange. Does anybody know whether there's any other way to get mum downstairs, please?

We've already tried St John's Ambulance, Red Cross and the GP surgery. It's logistically complicated because it needs to happen on the same day that her hospital bed is moved downstairs by the company that delivered it, so moving mum needs to be something we can arrange for a specific day. If anybody has experience of this I'd be very grateful to hear from you, thanks!

Try your local mountain rescue team, they are volunteers so if they can help you please make a generous donation.

They are trained and have equipment to carry injured people down mountains so a flight of stairs should be no bother.

They go to homes during flooding and snow so shouldn't refuse on the basis it is a house.

Do you chaps have a volunteer ambo service? DH is one (a volunteer) and he said they do this sort of thing.

That’s for deceased bodies!
Not the living.

Any chance of getting a stair lift put in? I know it's not an overnight solution but might help in the future.

There are private ambulances who also working with the living too. They often just do patient transfers. Some times they work at big events.

What about using an evacuation chair? They are probably too expensive to buy but you may be able to borrow one from somewhere Red Cross etc.

I think your best bet is going to have a chat with the local ambulance or fire service in person or on the phone not 999 and see if someone local wouldn't mind helping out. People are often more helpful than you think they will be and both services will have appropriate manual handling training and equipment. St John's is another group to try.

The fire service will likely offer a free fire safety check and install new smoke alarms etc if appropriate. They have a community role as well as an emergency rescue role.

You need an evac chair. Maybe the go or clinic could lend you one while the practise is shut

Would it not be easier to put a stair lift in?

I'd you can find a non-emergency number for your local ambulance service or fire service they may be able to advise. They have the specialist training and resources.

I work in a district nursing team and we arrange with the fire service to transfer patients. They have a dedicated number for professionals to arrange patient transfers. Adult social care should also be able to arrange this, usually can be arranged for the same day.

'Private ambulance' is often the logo on the outside of funeral vans when they transfer a body from a house.

But there are also private ambulance companies who transport live people to hospital, home, clinics, airports etc. They look no different from normal ambulances but will have a logo e.g Harley Street Ambulance; or SATS - they are ones I've worked with.

@Jellycats4life you are so right about the need for a service that can step in quickly. It's so frustrating, and absolutely exhausting trying to navigate the systems. We get asked things like 'well is it urgent?' and that's a really difficult question to answer. It's not currently life-threatening, but it could become so very quickly.

Mum wouldn't be able to bum-shuffle. She's lost almost all of her language so we're having to work out why we think she's scared. And I don't think she can process 'I need to get downstairs because that will be a better place to live'. She's much more in the moment than that.

I have found a private ambulance that will carry her down it so thanks for those suggestions all. Cost is £200 + VAT (unless I pay cash 🙄) for those who are interested.

And the suggestion of a second bed is genius, thanks @Darkbutstarrynight

My problem now is to persuade dad that I can project manage this and make it all happen. He's all for waiting for social services to sort it so he doesn't have to do any more thinking, but I'm worried that will take months.

Do you think you could walk her down with you in front and someone behind? You'd need to be super firm and it will feel horrible at the time, but I've got lots of people down the stairs that way. As long as she cab physically walk its automatic to take a step down with some steering and firm instructions.

Edit to say, a private ambulance service won't physically force her into a carry chair so make sure you guage whether she will be compliant before spending any money. If she flat out refuses to get in tbe chair you'll be in the same position but 200 quid poorer!

Best of luck, I know how stressful this must be

@JuvenileBigfoot did you even read any of the thread, or even the post you quoted? OP has got a solution and has clearly explained why your idea wouldn't work.

Why post on such a short thread and not bother reading it???

There is no need to be rude.

She doesn't have a solution as it sounds like her mother is very anxious and is likely to be non-compliant with being carried down. Hence my suggestion of her daughter (sorry OP I'm assuming you're a woman) walking her down with someone else who is familiar and therefore less likely to be frightening for the lady in question. The lady, if you read the thread, is able to walk, she just won't walk down the stairs.

I'm making a suggestion to try and help and to save money on something that may not work.

@JuvenileBigfoot No I don't think we could walk her down. Experience suggests that she'd resist and sit down which would be dangerous. We need to do this with trained professionals around who can lift and carry her.

She complied with being put into evac chairs by patient transport who took her to hospital appointments while her wrist was being treated. I know that what happened in the past isn't necessarily a good indication of what would happen now, but it's the best evidence I've got.

We think she'd be terrified on a stair lift.

As someone who has just crawled upstairs to sort out a room, we sleep downstairs but guest Room is upstairs. I'm waiting for hip and knee surgery. I'm scared of breaking something.

Urm. But she doesn’t need to attend hospital urgently? And then someone might die in a REAL fire because of this. Selfish suggestion when the alternative is spending some money to get it done professionally.

Why do you need someone to move the bed? I can understand that your mother needs to be carefully moved but can't you and a couple of friends move the bed? A bed is not going to get hurt if it slides down the stairs.

One of my neighbours was carried downstairs by the fire service, when he needed to go to a nursing home.

I’m not sure this would be safe in case she had a panic on the way down and she may be very frail.

🤣 don’t be so bloody dramatic 😱
The fire service will ALWAYS turn out immediately to persons reported in life threatening situations.
They don’t say “oh no sorry you’ll have to wait an hour while we carry a lady downstairs!” 😂

Have you spoken to social services about this ?
And explained that its currently a safety risk in that she's stuck upstairs. They may have suggestions and very likely will have encountered this situation in the past.

How about ringing around a few local home care agencies they may be able to provide this service for a fee.

Ah I hope it goes well.
Just, as I said, be aware they can't force her I to the chair.
Although I've seen situations where people with dementia respond well to uniforms and "authority" and comply when they haven't complied for family for years.
Crossing everything for you!