hoist idea for parent who had a stroke 15 years ago

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since my parent had a stroke a long time ago they became paralysed on one side. despite this they managed to generally look after themselves by using the strength of one side of their body and various apparatus.

both me and my sibling have children now and are settled in different cities from each other and from our parent. now their body is deteriorating and they cannot even stand up to get in and out of bed or on and off the commode. they refuse to go into a home (eventually maybe they will come round to it after this first step) but we've managed to convince them to move out of their house, so it can be sold, and into my sibling's house. my sibling has been trying to build an annexe for our parent for a few years but has run out of money and our parent can't keep waiting. the money from the house could help finish the annexe.

the problem is that, aside from needing to find a carer who could help multiple times a day, our parent is heavy and cannot lift themselves up anymore. we tried to move them onto their bed and commode but it wasn't possible and they were too scared of falling. we are right now trying to get hold of a mobility transport vehicle to move our parent asap as they are stuck on a mobility wheelchair currently unable to get into bed to sleep or onto a toilet. this is obviously very distressing for us all, and beyond unbearable for our parent. they are of sound mind and we cannot force them to do anything. they would rather stay on the chair for a few days than call an ambulance to help them into bed. we obviously should have set up a carer earlier but they also refused this.

we need to try to set up the annexe like a mini care home, mimicking all of their equipment, particularly whatever hoist system is used for heavy people who cannot move much of their body due to paralysis.

carers would not be able to lift our parent even with help from my sibling. we need to find a hoist system that would work to lift our parent in and out of bed and on and off the toilet. does anyone have any ideas? i have no idea where to start. when i say our parent is heavy i don't mean beyond hoist weight limits but just too heavy for safe manual lifting. thanks for any advice.

Please reconsider, if your parent is so disabled they can no longer be moved at all using their own strength, then you need 24 hour care, 2 carers and the proper equipment.
your sister will end up disabled herself and you will then need to care and move them both.

please ask social services for support, they will send the right person to assess and recommend the right equipment.

it may be that a care home is the best place

You need occupational therapy and physio assessments for your parent, which can be discussed with the GP. Physio will assess the appropriate means of transfer/mobility for them and then OT will be able to tell you what equipment is needed for them to exist in their home environment with their assessed needs.

Also, in my local area - if you call the ambulance due to being stuck in a chair or having fallen and being unable to get up they don’t send an ambulance out for these - there is a team called Urgent Care Response who have lifting equipment, etc - they are nurses/physios/carers, etc - who will get the person up and comfortable, check for injuries/illness, and then assess the home environment for immediate risk of falling again, etc. If they identify that there is a care need immediately they will bridge the gap with care calls until social services or family can get an appropriate package of care in place.

I think in this situation I would be calling 111 or 999 to discuss, regardless of my parents wishes - there may be a similar service near to your parent which is literally designed for the exact scenario that you are describing.

You need an occupational therapist assessment.

However I think you might need to over ride them and get an ambulance too. If they can't be moved they will be incontinent,you can't change them and risk of skin breakdown.

How heavy are you talking? It will depend on weight etc.

Sounds like your parent needs to go into full time care.
You will both injure yourselves further trying to lift and move them. I'm talking from experience here.
They never want to go into a home - but it does come to the point where they can no longer manage in their own home.

This is an emergency . They will get pressure sores if you leave them. Please don’t leave her. (Doctor)
Call 111 . You need emergency assistance which may involve an admission to hospital while you cannot cope. She needs an OT assessment and proper plan for looking after her.

I think you need a professional assessment so you know what safety equipment is required. This way you will know how best to avoid further injuring your parent AND your sibling.

You cannot leave someone stuck in a chair for days! That is an emergency.

And then you need a proper assessment for the right type of hoist, and carers trained to use it. This is not something you can bodge as a DIY job.

Your parent cannot stay stuck on the wheelchair 'for a few days' however much they argue with you.

They will develop pressure sores that will take forever to heal and be sitting in their own waste for days.

None of what you are suggesting will be done in a few days, let alone a few hours. This is an emergency and needs an ambulance and you need to get your parent to agree, even if this involves having a massive row with them.

now their body is deteriorating and they cannot even stand up to get in and out of bed or on and off the commode. they refuse to go into a home (eventually maybe they will come round to it after this first step)

That time has come op, your mum cannot be left in a chair indefinitely, sitting in her own waste, whilst you scramble to find a way to mobilise her.

She needs specialist 24/7 care. Now.

I agree with the others. If they are unable to get off the chair you will need to call emergency services now for help to get her back to bed. If she is left to chair and develops pressure ulcers (which are very nasty and painful) this would also be a sadeguarding agains who ever is meant to look after her. There is also a concern that has something else happened (ie another stroke, infection etc) if previously she was able to get off the wheelchair.

she will need an urgent occupational therapy assessment to look at her equipment and care needs to avoid hospital admission (if there is not need for this yet). Sound like she will likely require hospital bed, transfer equipment and double handed package of care for support. If family is looking to move her into annex thatbis currently being build I would also encourage to contact major adaptations OT / private OT specialising in building works prior to finalising design to ensure it is fully accessible for wheelchair user, ie wetroom of suitable sice, turning spaces, diirways, ? Ceiling track hoist. This can avoid costly issues later on.

I agree that this is really serious and your loved one just can’t sit in a chair. If they can’t reposition, their skin will break down incredibly quickly!

You urgently need OT assessment for suitable equipment and likely carers to support. Incorrect or ill fitting hoisting equipment can lead to serious injury or death so it is vital all these things are fitted and I doubt it would be quick!

I think this is an emergency and you all need to accept that before they develop pressure areas or infection. I would call an ambulance!

I think I would call 111 rather than an ambulance but I would do it right now.

Umm this is an emergency and a safeguarding concern. Consider respite until the annexe is complete as you are clearly not coping at present nor acting in their best interest. I appreciate it's tough, I'm not having a go, but you need to try and see this from an outsiders perspective . How are they managing the toilet for example. And sleep is important, they need a safe and accessible place to sleep. How is their skin? Do they have capacity, has this been formally assessed recently? Are they eating and drinking ok?

I'm trying really hard not to lose my rag, here.
What are you all thinking? This is a terrible situation, and pressure sores can quickly turn into infected ulcers. S/he cannot be left like this.
You need to call 111. Why have you not contacted your GP for district nurse support?

S/he needs to go to hospital or for immediate respite care in a care home. Poor parent.