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Elderly parents

Am I doing the right thing?

2 replies

WowIlikereallyhateyou · 06/06/2024 20:33

Here goes..
Mother, 80’s,who has always been incredibly difficult,selfish,narcissistic has recently taken a turn for the worst and has started getting increasingly stressed,scared and anxious after constantly claiming she has intruders in different places in her home. Countless neighbours/ police and visits from me have confirmed that indeed this is a figment of her imagination, but not surprisingly she insists we are all wrong. At the same time she has become increasingly aggressive and argumentative, forgetful ( leaves gas hob on) etc . She goes out wandering on the street with a knife, goes to neighbours late etc,etc.
Fast forward a few weeks, Dr eventually suggests an mri scan, and she is hospitalised for three weeks and is then assessed by psychiatrist consultant. Who is of the belief she has dementia with Lewy bodies. ( no official diagnosis though!)
I am absolutely sure mum is not safe in her current state alone at home and would be much better placed in assisted living facilities for her own safety. OT have been in touch this week from hospital and expect her to come back to where she has been living,as they say she can dress, feed and clean herself ( she does not own her own property, family owned peppercorn rent), but there is nobody to care for her, watch over her when she goes on one of her mad wanders and i am a full time working only child. I am certain she will not be safe returning without plenty of help.OT seem keen for her to come home,but I do not think it is an appropriate course of action returning to where she lives currently, are there any other options?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 07/06/2024 06:41

You tell them that you will not be providing any care or support, and ask for your contact details to be removed. Get an urgent social services review.
You have to remove yourself from helping, or they will leave it all on you.

MumChp · 07/06/2024 06:44

Most likely it won't work out at home but they will return her to her home and go from there.

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