Breast cancer, no surgical treatment in 78 year old

[jenkel]

My Mum was diagnosed with a small hormonal Breast cancer in Jan, she has been put on tablets and was due to have surgery next week. However due to her health they have now decided that she is not fit for surgery. We are due to have an appointment next week with her consultants but we are at the end of our tether. She has a pacemaker and is slightly overweight, they don’t believe that she will survive anaesthetic. Now I am obliviously pleased they are taken it seriously but what on earth does this mean. She was originally asked if she wanted to go for surgery which she did, she just wants it gone and was told the tablets would only work for 5 years or so and she would then need surgery. She would rather much have surgery now than in 5 years but sounds like that isn’t an option any more, can the tablets work, will they be enough, is there alternatives? I have had lots of advice form Mumsnet regarding my Mums journey, so sorry for asking for more. Obviously we will find out more next week but has anybody been through something similar.

I'm.sorry to hear your Mum is unwell.

Surgery does carry risk plus preparation, surgery and recovery takes a section of one's life away in some respects. So, to that end, if she is unlikely to tolerate surgery well then this is the best decision. Obviously ask them why this is the case to get more information about the anaesthetic issue.

My Mum did have surgery for Bowel Cancer but they then only did the minimum option and sewed her back up as once they could see what was going on, they decided surgery would have been too major and would have been unlikely to extend her life by much. This might be why - they may feel in the round the medication is likely to buy as much time for her as surgery and medication.

Everyone's cancer story is different as the stage and type make huge differences. Take a list of all of your questions to the meeting. My Mum even recorded hers when I couldn't go which they were happy to allow.

My grandmother had surgery for a very small breast cancer. In retrospect, it was probably the wrong decision. Her health and mental health declined rapidly. Yes, they cured her cancer, but the physical demands of the surgery destroyed her quality of life.

we can never know what her life would have been like with palliative care. I have always wondered though if she might have been better off just living her best life with that small cancer for as long as it stayed small. It wasn’t making her sick. By the time it did, it might have been untreatable, but she might have had several good years and then a quick demise instead of a long, lingering loss of self.