Any advice would be grateful

[Kimmints1]

Hi all,I am new here. Il try make short.My mum is 89 pallative care, she has vascular dementia and heart failure and other problems with heart. She is housebound, hoisted from bed to chair.She is later stage demetia and severe heart failure.My sister is her sole carer, since she stopped carers going to help, and one of my daughters goes in 6 days a week to help, because myself and sister were doing caring but we ended up arguing constantly and it was unfair to my mum and dad, who is 85 with health problems too.I wonder, as I'm not even updated about mums health etc, and can only visit for minimal time, as my sister is very controlling and manipulative, and she reads everything on Google and even trys telling drs and nurses about mums needs, including her medication. The reason for this thread is to ask if anyone with there love one, has them in there chair all day, apart from to hoist to bed to change, and wake them up to reposition or get food and drink into them, and medication. My concern is my sister has been told about mums unable to swallow properly and when and if mum wants anything, but my sister pushes food and drink, she wakes my mum continually.Two weekends ago we had princess alice nurses out as mum was unconscious and had no food or drink for over 12 hours, The nurse told my sister not to put in chair but she did , and the nurse had to come back to mum and my sister had,on her own put her in chair.My worry is she is the keeping mum in chair all day from 8am to 8 pm, and keep waking her, moving her, getting food and drink down her, I understand she needs it but she doesn't give mum a rest.She won't give oxycodone slow release as she tried 1 tablet and my sister said it made mum breathless, she won't let the Dr give mum lorazepam as she said it does same, pallative nurse have told my sister, mum is deteriorating and will need mote than oxycodone liquid twice a day and paracetomol when my sister feels my mum needs.It upsets me as I know my.mum is suffering but my sister won't listen to anyone.any advice would be appreciated, sorry its so long Kim

Hi we have a financial poa but my sister doesn't let me see bank accounts and mums savings, If she's able to do financial things on her own, the PoA clearly allows you to act jointly and severally, so you too can do things one your own. Any banks and building societies where your sister has access to your mum's saving will have taken a copy of the PoA document, so if you go in with id for yourself, you should be able to get access to her accounts once you remind them they already have the PoA registered with them. You don't need to tell your sister you are doing this. All hell will let loose if you try to do anything with the money, but at least you will be able to watch what your sister is doing with it.