Power of attorney

[Geekylover]

Hello

to cut a long story short I am about to have poa for mum for health and finance.

its been a rough few months with numerous falls and admissions to hospital. I was told today she has been drinking alcohol and this has been noted on admission. I asked how we can be supported through this and I was told it is up to me to sort it out as I am power of attorney. I’m suffering mentally with all this going on and now I have this to deal with. Has anyone had anything like this? I don’t know where to start

Do you think she has a problem with alcohol ? Local organizations like Age Uk may have alcohol support groups for older people, I know our local one does and they can offer support/ coffee mornings/ companionship. Hospitals can refer to the scheme so may be worth asking if a referral to a support group could be made. I guess your mum needs to recognise there is a problem and agree to referral assuming she has capacity.

Can you ask to speak to the hospital social worker? They will have ideas for you.

Power of attorney means the healthcare team must share information with you and that you can refuse treatment on your relatives' behalf. It doesn't make you the healthcare teams' dogsbody!

Ask about detox support in the hospital. The trust i work at has an alcohol support worker and AA meetings for inpatients.

Thanks for this. I have been their dogsbody for months and I have really had enough. I have had contact with an alcohol team in the past and probably need to contact them. When I asked yesterday I was told she isn’t showing withdrawal symptoms so isn’t addicted….i took that as ‘ so she gets no support’ . Hopefully I’m wrong.

Hi and thanks. She doesn’t admit to having a problem and is not 100% capacity. This makes things so much harder. It has been suggested when I have poa I limit her money in her best interest. Is sounds morally wrong but they say it is for her good so is acceptable.

Is sounds morally wrong but they say it is for her good so is acceptable. Depends whether she still has the capacity to understand what the implications of her drinking are. Having capacity includes the capacity to make bad decisions.

In a way it’s analogous to refusal to accept medical treatment. You wouldn’t give medical treatment that you knew the donor was dead set against. On the other hand, facilitating alcohol abuse is doing actual harm. You, as attorney, aren’t allowed to do that - eg you can’t stick a pillow over her head no matter how much she begs you. It’s complicated.