Oddities in aging parent

[RainbowColourcake]

My mother is in her early 70s.

Over the past two years I saw some things in her. Just some odd stuff here and there. She looks confused first thing in the morning and I am wary about her mood and tone first thing in the morning. She has some anger spells that are quite often disapproriate to what is. Completely blown out of proportion.

I have a long list of stuff that happened over the past two to three years. Like she told me she has high cholestrol (the GP found it) but she doesn't want medicine and she wants to treat it naturally through her diet. My mother wanted me to research a diet online for her to lower cholesterol. Only she ever took it seriously and complained about the changes suggested and never carried through. High cholesterol was identified again in recent times and the same thing happened. I am astonished how the GP never referred her to a dietician.

Over the past 6 weeks or so, there's been a lot of silent treatment from her where she's not talking to me unless she wants something. I also noticed OCD and manic cleaning spells. From the moment she finished her breakfast til evening time she attacks sections of the house for cleaning and deep cleaning but it's every day. There's no change in her day to day stuff. It's every day she's doing this. She is just attacking sections of the house and home and she's utterly phased out in her own world of cleaning and paranoia. I came home last week to find a whole entire room cleared out as if it was going to be redecorated but there was no plan for redecorated. She just took everything out. Everything. The room was bare.
Another week the kitchen got emptied out and every Delph and lot and pan and mug and cutlery was washed, boiled and polished.

Then this week she was attacking another section of the home and she boiled the kettle. I thought she was going to have a break and a cup of tea for herself but nope- she carried the kettle into the bathroom. I had to follow her then to see what she was doing in fear she would pour it down the toilet and crack the toilet bowl. Thankfully she didn't do that but she poured it all around the shower drain but it's only a matter of time before she's going to do that to be honest. She's utterly paranoid and obsessed and I can't get her to take a break.

I am exhausted just watching her.

I was trying to redirect her yesterday and encourage her to go to town today but she never went. And she's now attacking more sections in the kitchen. The place is not that bad.

I feel like there's no real structure to what she's doing.

She asked me to go to the shop this morning for milk and bread and I usually do help her but I had to make excuses not to do this in the hope that she goes herself and it just breaks her out from what she's doing.

Do all older people turn this way?

Do you know if she did talk to her GP about any of this. She probably wouldn't recognise much of it in herself?

The high cholesterol, in my experience you don't go near a dietician, you just get a nurse at the GP surgery telling you to cut down on cake and red meat and the GP offers to prescribe statins.

Thanks for your reply.

I haven't discussed my concerns with my mother due to her tone and temperament and the likely aggression that will follow even though I am coming from a good place.

I have a long list of observations and it's all exetremely odd stuff here and there and there is tuff that's happening that's not right. I don't think she would be aware of what I am observing and adding up. There's definitely something happening with her but I don't know what it is.

Her comprehension is exetremely low.

For example she asked my to get a recommendation of a plumber and she wanted my neighbours plumber and she wanted me to get his name and number of my neighbour. I had a chat with my neighbour to get his name and number. This naturally spiked a curiosity in my neighbour and I gave a brief description of what our plumbing issue is. My neighbour was concerned and wanted to know if he could help us more with his DIY skills. All lovely. My mother wasn't aware of my chat with the neighbour hut I got the plumbers name and number.

My mother through an absolute fit of explosive anger raging at me - 'how very dare you....stop taking about our problems to the neughbours'. When that is not what happened.
I asked for my neighbours plumber (and gave a brief description of what we have).

Her comprehension is shit.

I very much highly doubt that she spoke to her own GP about the issues I see. I think there is definitely a decline in her brain and I am experiencing behavioural issues with her.

could it be a UTI? that can cause odd behaviour. Any history of dementia or mental disorders in your family?

Sounds a bit like my mum with the disordered thinking, paranoia and explosive rage but mine has always been like that, no dementia she's just a battleaxe, so I leave her to it and keep an eye on her from a distance via visiting paid carers these days. So my advice is probably skewed from handling a challenging personality, but if it gets too much take a step back, limit contact even temporarily to protect your peace of mind, only do what you can cope with. Elderly people treat it as a marathon not a sprint, you'll need your emotional energy for times when things get tough and this can go on for decades.